Outrageous Liars

LutonGirl

I am loving this thread! Keep the stories coming, they are making lunchtime more interesting. I just need to remember some of the tales I've heard to contribute.

Although not strictly an outrageous liar, I did work with a guy some years ago who would recycle anecdotes he'd heard as his own. He tripped himself up though when he told one of my own tales back to me.

Reading through these posts, it's amazing just how many folk claim to have been related to the Krays. (You could leave your doors open and they only killed their own... allegedly)

SuziQ

A lad I sat next to in maths at school told everyone he had cancer and had weeks left to live.

Weirdly he was still at school years later, and his mum confirmed he'd never had cancer.

I don't get why you'd say that when clearly you're going to get caught out when you don't die

Reminds me of a sad situation when I was at school back in the 70's. there was a mouthy girl, something of a risk taker shall I say, in my class. She started to put weight on towards the end of a school year, and suddenly announced she was emigrating to Australia in the summer ( this was actually quite common in the 60's and 70's, so no one batted an eyelid.)



She came back to school in September, much trimmer. Yes, she had her baby in the summer. She had decided to keep it after all ( good for her) and fessed up to us all that she had a child. She had been with the child's father a couple of years, even though she was only about 14 when she had the baby. I was shocked and actually quite impressed that she was bringing the child up and doing O levels. She actually stayed with that guy, married him,but I saw her a few years ago, and they had sadly been unable to have any more children and her husband died of cancer when he was only about 38. Very sad

sassyblue

LutonGirl wrote: »

Reading through these posts, it's amazing just how many folk claim to have been related to the Krays.:)

I think these people think it makes them look tougher - that's my own psychology - along with claiming to be in the SAS and stuff. Sad really, all these liars have to be pretty insecure to want to tell lies - or they love the drama either way not positive attributes.

Mr_Toad

When I go to parties I always tell people who ask me what I do for a living that I'm a yoghurt salesman.

In reality I work in IT but when nearly every house in the country has a computer telling people you're in IT is a big mistake.

You end up trapped in a corner and the conversation usually starts "You know about computers.......can't send emails.......how do I.....in Word.....Excel.....blue screen....virus.....won't turn on......won't turn off.....and the dog stuck its nose in the fan.......sat on the laptop.....can't get the CD out.......where can I download......."

They then expect you to diagnose their problems unseen and for free or worse, call round at the weekend and fix it.:mad:

Telling them they're too stupid to own a computer seems to offend them as does telling them you'd be happy to come over in your precious spare time and fix their problem for £250. :eek:

Worse than the people with a problem are the enthusiast who likes to bore the @rse off you by telling you how wonderful his system is and how clever he is for buying the best PC on the planet for under £100 or how he's built some Frankenstein computer from bits of scrap and junk he's bought off eBay!:eek:

I used to go out with a doctor and it was the same for her if people found out. I've got this pain....

They get upset if you point out that you're at a party and don't want to spend all night talking about work. :mad:

Sorry that turned into a bit of a rant but I feel better now. :rotfl:

fashionlover10

Mr_Toad wrote: »

When I go to parties I always tell people who ask me what I do for a living that I'm a yoghurt salesman.

In reality I work in IT but when nearly every house in the country has a computer telling people you're in IT is a big mistake.

I wish my OH would fib when people ask what he does. He's a mechanic so I usually end up finding him talking engine management lights, cambelts and clutches with people all night. Most people seem to expect him to diagnose and/or magically fix said problem there and then lol.

Mr_Toad

fashionlover10 wrote: »

I wish my OH would fib when people ask what he does. He's a mechanic so I usually end up finding him talking engine management lights, cambelts and clutches with people all night. Most people seem to expect him to diagnose and/or magically fix said problem there and then lol.

Yep, there's always someone.

barbiedoll

When I was (much) younger, a guy in a nightclub was trying to chat me up. I wasn't really interested but I was bored so when he asked me what I did for a living, I told him that I was a HGV driver. I'm quite short so he looked quite incredulous but I waffled on about the size of my rig and how I was due to drive to Switzerland over the weekend to deliver a load of giant Toblerones (I know, I know!)
He was listening agog and eventually he asked me how I managed to reach the pedals as I was so "petite"

I told him that I glued wooden blocks to my shoes................:D

top_drawer_2

I used to work in an organisation where we had many volunteers working, and it seemed this led to all sorts of weird and wonderful people working for the organisation.

One volunteer in particular was/is a chronic liar who told us she was best friends with John Barrowman and his partner Scott Gill. She would regularly regale us with tales of him picking her up from her (council) house and whisking her off to Edinburgh for the weekend, attending film previews and meeting numerous celebrities as well as the more mundane theatre visits, meals out to top restaurants and the amount it all cost (they paid obviously).

The thing was we caught her (although didn't tell her) checking his twitter feed so that she could tell us what she had done this weekend. She was so detailed though recounting conversations, claiming her interests were more in line with Scott's than John's, told us how he bought her expensive clothes and took her to his famous friends houses or to a secret première of a film, introduced her to all his famous friends and then eventually got her a job as a script writer for the BBC!! In fact she cut down on her days in order to cope with the "workload."

She eventually left in a strop as she said that she never felt that the staff trusted her to undertake any task in the organisation - things did tend to go missing when she was around .....

GlasweJen

My boss likes to tell tall tales, he once told us about the time he met a famous footballer who played for one of the Old Firm. This footballer was so bowled over by his son that he treated them to lunch and bought the son a toy and signed a shirt for him ok the spot and everything. Apparently the footballer couldn't have kids and that's why he took such a shine to his son.

The look on his face when later that same day I was in the staffroom showing my colleague photos of uncle famous footballer at his (older than bosses son) daughters wedding!

We all learned to smile and nod, funnily enough he's related to a gangster family too, I must ask him if he has any SAS connections when I'm next in work.

RevolvingDoor

Some of these are so funny!:rotfl: