Outrageous Liars

oxfordrocks

I've always found women to be the best liars.

Everything about them is a lie.

Lipstick and make-up to alter their appearance.

High heels to make them look taller while pulling in their stomach and pushing out their backsides.

Wearing bras to give their sagging bosom a "lift"

Dyeing roots, nail varnish, shaping briefs etc....etc...

Head to toe a woman is one huge lie....before they even open their mouths!:rotfl:

(I'm only joking.................I love all women):A

ValHaller

I must say that those of us such as myself who were in the SAS, really despise those wannabe's who pretend just for a few moments of fame.

simple_but_sweet

a friend of mine once used the excuse "my goldfish died" not to head on a night out, I think it later transpired she didn't actually own any!

simple_but_sweet

within our socialising group there's one bloke who I can't listen to anymore. It used to be every week he'd talk about all these women chasing him on nights out and dancing with this girl and that girl, coincidentally it only happened when no one else was around!

Same fella sat one night telling me that i should break up with my then boyfriend cos my dad had told a mutual friend that me and him should get together. Complete nonsense!

bestpud

I was at college with a woman who arrived late one day and ended up causing an argument with another student. She apologised and said it was because her brother in law had been in a massive car accident the night before and was in ITU.

This went on for a few weeks, with this guy having ups and downs and crises where she'd have to take off to support her sister etc.

Thing is, I knew her husband's sister (other side of the family) and happened to ask how he was getting on over a holiday from college.

Turned out he had had a bad accident and there was some semblance of truth in every update we'd had, but it had all happened around 2 years earlier! She'd been reliving it and getting a second dose of sympathy!

Errata

This went on for a few weeks, with this guy having ups and downs and crises where she'd have to take off to support her sister etc.

Pathological liars always over egg the pudding!

Saturnalia

I find it funny to tell people I am a model.

I can see them looking at me and thinking "yeah right!" I'm too short for the catwalk, too big for fashion full-stop, too plain to model make-up, have short hair so clearly don't model for hairdressers, and I'm flat-chested so obviously don't do lingerie or glamour!

But I do work occasionally as a life model for art classes.

westy23

HI
I can remember telling a few colleagues some of the stories my
dad told me about his time as a jap prisoner of war in ww2.
Later that day a friend told me that there was a rumour going round
that i made the stories up and that he was never a prisoner.
The next day i took a copy his military records to work and left them for all to see.
A story i remember dad telling me was how most of the men were unable to eat monkey as when it was cooked (boiled i think)
all the hair came off and it looked like a human baby.
Another story was when he dropped a chunkel (google it)
and was nearly beaten to death by the guards.

Robisere

I will turn this upside-down giving a lie I once told, that I have regretted and been ashamed of all my life. Anyone going to join me in this?

Many years ago, whilst in the army in Germany, a mate and I used to read the Services magazine "Union Jack". Lots of girls wrote in from the UK, asking for Service pen-pals and we answered two of them. I won't say where they were from, because as I say the shame and regret is still with me today in my 60's.

We corresponded with these girls for almost six months and we sent them photos of us, singly and together, asking for photos in return. We should have been suspicious, but our requests were stone walled at first, until I gave an ultimatum, just before we were due to go on leave and meet them - send photos, or we are not coming.

Well, the photos arrived and as you might expect they were 'not as advertised'. we were not Movie Stars, but we were young, fit and had a mental picture that did not tally with the photos. I panicked in my youth, so did my mate, until I had a brainwave. My mate wrote to the one I was supposed to meet and told her that I had been injured a my car when it was written-off, and I was in hospital, in Intensive Care. This had been my brilliant idea, could not blame my mate, he was just the messenger.

The whole thing died a death and I forgot it, until one day a similar thing happened to me. Someone I really liked and thought I was in love with, lied about another relationship she was in. I caught her in the lie and was incandescent with anger for a while. Then I thought back to my own lie and realised that I was no better. It has been many years since that incident - over 40 - but I still remember it and I just hope that she found what she was looking for with someone else.

Regarding the "Walter Mitty" type of liars, though, I have a real example living nearby, parks his car next to mine. He has an old Escort and I have a newish Focus, he has always been about to get a spanking new model before every older car that his Motor-Trader Sson gets him, for free. He has been an RAF policeman, once told me that he caught a Russian spy on one base. Forgot that I knew he had only been in the RAF less than a year and left under a cloud. Everything I have, he has bigger, better, or is about to get. I don't ever put him right, or let him know that I know he is talking complete BS, because I know where he comes from (a vilage next to my own birthplace, know all his family) He had a really awful childhood, a worse time as he get older. He has a stammer and does not meet my eyes while he is telling his romances, and they are all so blindingly obviously false, but I don't say so because I feel great pity for a life so ruined and miserable that he has to live another in his mind.

MORAL: there, but for the grace of fortune, ...

Hardup_Hester

We had someone at work who couldn't walk into a pub without Jean Claude Van Dam or Vinny Jones picking a fight with him, he always won the fights.
Many years ago when I was running swingers parties lots of single men tried to get an invite by lying & inventing a non-existant wife.
Hester