Doulas

emsywoo123

mrbrightside842 wrote: »

How much does a Doula cost? If she's tied only to you for 4 weeks to prevent overlap, then how much is a months wage for her?

Sorry it's probably my post that has confused matters.
I mean to say, a doula may be working with several mothers, but when I would have been at 38-42 weeks she ensured she had no others that would be 38-42 weeks either for that time.

emsywoo123

fluffymuffy wrote: »

I've had several babies and the best experience was the one where I was alone at the hospital. Alone in that I didn't have DH or anyone I arrived with. The staff are much more relaxed without husbands/friends/relatives hanging about. They certainly didn't leave me all alone - I had a nursing axillary - a lovely older lady/salt of the earth type. More of a party atmosphere. Long gone are the days when women need to argue to get their wishes respected in any case.

The idea of someone hired to be there for me is just creepy.

Polar opposite of my birthing experience!!

aliasojo

Nicki wrote: »

I'm not sure it's fair to tell a woman that her midwife won't leave her if she doesn't want to be left as I don't believe this to be the case. A midwife could easily have more than one woman to look after at a time and will pop in and out to check progress but will not necessarily be able to be there throughout the entire labour.

This was certainly my experience.

I've had 3 kids, only with the 1st did I have a midwife with me for most of it and I suspect that's because I was young and clearly terrified. :rotfl:

I was left alone for large parts of the other 2 labours, the ward was busy and it was a case of who needed help most at any given time.

I don't think a doula would have been for me but I can completely understand why someone might consider one.

All our experiences are just that....our experiences. No-one can say for sure what the OP might experience. Even if the 'norm' is *whatever*, there's no guarantee that the 'norm' is what the OP will get.

If the thought of hiring a doula is comforting to the OP and she can afford it, then why not. Anything that helps reduce anxiety at this time has to be a good thing. (Again, as long as it's affordable.)

Good luck OP.

callow

Well I was definitely left by my midwife.

I knew my husband would be useless and not support me so I a specifically written in my birth plan that I would like the midwife to stay with me throughout. It was the first sentence.

She kept leaving and just popping in every now and then. I was in established labour at 5 cm at this stage so I was there labouring on my own with my husband sitting in the corner reading his paper (after having gone down for a hospital breakfast). She only showed him how to support me when I finally gave in and wanted an epidural and was waiting for the anaesthetist.

This was a while ago when there wasn't the availability of doulas as there is today. I would definitely have one now if I could afford it. A different midwife may have supported me but mine didn't.

fluffymuffy

mrbrightside842 wrote: »

How much does a Doula cost? If she's tied only to you for 4 weeks to prevent overlap, then how much is a months wage for her?

I guess you'd need to pay a few thousand pounds if there's no overlap. People need to earn a living wage after all. Otherwise there's an element of charity in it. And that's a really disturbing thought.

jackyann

crvs wrote: »

Reason , Im considering doulas because , I dont have any female friends to ask. I have a good aquitances but dont have any good friends. Furthermore , I cannot get my parents or in laws to help me out.

Vidhya

I think you are right to consider a doula if you can afford one. Whilst those who point out that there is no official registration or training, a reputable organisation such as the NCT is going to be very careful.
Without doubt, UK midwives are supportive & caring and do an excellent job. If I knew that my maternity unit was well staffed I wouldn't think that I needed a doula; but given the pressure some units are under, the idea of having someone else to offer the ice chips, the sponge, the fan etc. etc. is very appealing. When I did my midwifery training 40+ years ago, we were under instruction never to leave a labouring woman for an instant without calling another midwife in. Not so now.

crvs

fluffnutter wrote: »

Having said that, a doula might be a nice idea for you. Not sure how much they charge though, so I can't help you on that. How far along are you?

I'm 26 +2 weeks pregnant. I have seen on doula today but would see 2 more before making a decision.

Vidhya

crvs

mrbrightside842 wrote: »

How much does a Doula cost? If she's tied only to you for 4 weeks to prevent overlap, then how much is a months wage for her?

Doula I visited today said that she will not overlap for a month. She is charging £400 for birth (2 ante natal - hospital (initial stage until baby is born + 1 post natal visit) . For post natal £15 / hour.

She is registered with doula uk.

Vidhya

SingleSue

I always thought my (now ex) husband would be useless during labour but although we got off to a bad start as he had a hypo, he was absolutely amazing.

Nothing was too much trouble, he knew what I wanted (poor chap didn't have a choice, I had nagged it into him in the weeks before) and was putting my point across just as forcefully as I would have done if I had been able. He was also right there with the ice chips or the gas and air or the sponge..in short and bearing in mind he could see very clearly all that was going wrong, he was amazing.

Blimey, not often I say something so nice about him but he wasn't all bad...just the last few years.

crvs

emsywoo123 wrote: »

I mean to say, a doula may be working with several mothers, but when I would have been at 38-42 weeks she ensured she had no others that would be 38-42 weeks either for that time.

Doula I saw today told me that if I will go with her then there will be no overlap between April 18th 2013 - May 14th 2013. My due date is May 2nd 2013.

Thanks,
Vidhya