Doulas

crvs

All,

Has anyone considered hiring or hired a doulas for birth? I and husband have no one to help us during the due date. He is very emotional but dont know how he is going to support me during labour. Hence Im considering doulas. Any suggestions.

Vidhya

Ladyhawk

I seemed to remember a regular poster on the Old Style board was a retired doula... I am not sure how that helps but thought I'd mention it.

Person_one

What country do you live in?

If you're in the UK you will have a qualified midwife to help you.

emsywoo123

I had a doula. Very worthwhile. Let me know if you have any specific questions?

guruchelles

Doulas can be very good at effectively getting your wishes across to health care professionals when you are too tired/in the zone to do so.

Do you have a birth plan/anything you would rather do or avoid?

Person_one

Bear in mind when you're looking into it that literally anyone can call themselves a Doula, no training, qualification, specific knowledge or registration is required. Be careful what you spend your money on!

fluffnutter

Why do you say you have no one to help you?

skintchick

I had a doula. I loved having someone there who was entirely for me and my choices, who would advocate for me, look after me and help my husband, and ensure the midwife adhered to what I wanted.

I had a home birth, and my doula came out long before the midwife arrived, and helped feed me, get me drinks, rub my back, suggest things I could do, and just generally encouraged me and told me I could do it.

She was the one who realised I was pushing, and who helped me to the toilet, and helped me decide if I wanted to cut the cord that was too short even though I had wanted a Lotus birth.

I don't think my husband could have done all that, he was very emotional throughout the birth, and the midwife wasn't there to do that, she was there to oversee the birth and step in should there be any emergency (she did massge my perineum to stop me tearing, then had to apologise afterwards becuase they're not supposed to touch you without permission. I hadn't even noticed).

I heartily recommend a doula because they are all about YOU, whereas the midwives, and doctors in some cases, are about the birth, not you.

Worth every penny IMo but do interview them, get references, check qualifications, etc.

You can also hire them postnatally to help with breastfeeding (do check what training they've done though) and even housework! Midwives definitely don't do that person_one

Person_one

skintchick wrote: »

I had a doula. I loved having someone there who was entirely for me and my choices, who would advocate for me, look after me and help my husband, and ensure the midwife adhered to what I wanted.

I had a home birth, and my doula came out long before the midwife arrived, and helped feed me, get me drinks, rub my back, suggest things I could do, and just generally encouraged me and told me I could do it.

She was the one who realised I was pushing, and who helped me to the toilet, and helped me decide if I wanted to cut the cord that was too short even though I had wanted a Lotus birth.

I don't think my husband could have done all that, he was very emotional throughout the birth, and the midwife wasn't there to do that, she was there to oversee the birth and step in should there be any emergency (she did massge my perineum to stop me tearing, then had to apologise afterwards becuase they're not supposed to touch you without permission. I hadn't even noticed).

I heartily recommend a doula because they are all about YOU, whereas the midwives, and doctors in some cases, are about the birth, not you.

Worth every penny IMo but do interview them, get references, check qualifications, etc.

You can also hire them postnatally to help with breastfeeding (do check what training they've done though) and even housework! Midwives definitely don't do that person_one

They do their own, I expect, but no they aren't maids or cleaners. If I wanted a maid or a cleaner I'd hire one of those!

The first bolded is just, weird. You're the one giving birth! Maybe if you hadn't had a doula you'd have a different understanding of what midwives do. (I'm not remotely surprised you had one though, if I had to name one poster on here who would...:rotfl:)

skintchick

Doulas ensure your birth wishes are respected and will advocate for you should you end up in a situation where HPs are pushing for interventiosn you don't want when you are not in a position to be able to argue effectiuvely because you are in the middle of giving birth.

I don;t understand your comment to be honest. Yes, the woman is the one giving birth. What do you mean?


I'll ignore the personal dig because unless you can be bothered to explain exactly what you mean and why you think it, I can't be bothered to respond to such childishness.

jackyann

The NCT do training for doulas, so I would look on their site. You do need to be clear that they are not medically / midwifery trained; but they can be very helpful.
I would consider asking a sensible friend or older female relative to be there with you, but of course, they need to be the right person, and available - not always the case!