Social services onto me about not having child in nursery! Advice needed

coolcait

I'm not quite sure how or why I have gone from posting on a thread about child protection, to posting on a thread about home education. :eek:

Especially when it seems to be the same thread...

Edited to add - kudos to the poster above for uniting the two themes!

POPPYOSCAR

poet123 wrote: »

I do think that the two issues are inextricably linked.

I didn't go to nursery, but that was because my mother was a sahm and I was surrounded by a large extended family. No two days were the same, I certainly didn't lack stimulation or interaction with either my peers or adults, or miss out on age appropriate activities.

My own children went to "playschool" rather than nursery. They all went for a maximum of three mornings a week. When the eldest started it was staffed by mums and was replicating my childhood in many ways; baking, water play, naps, fun learning by osmosis. Certainly not the structured environment my youngest encountered. I didnt want academia for my kids from the age of 3, I wanted them to have peer interaction with supervised play. No targets, no rigidity.

I can understand why some parents wouldn't want the Ofsted inspected, target driven nurseries that we have today and they certainly shouldn't be seen as odd for feeling that way.

However, if by doing that ( and other seemingly innocuous things) they hit the triggers for SS contact then I think it is a small price to pay to protect other children for whom such withdrawal from what is now the accepted the norm may be a front for abuse/neglect. It is about being clear why you are doing xyz and being open with the authorities and allaying any fears. I agree it shouldn't be necessary but sadly, case histories show that it is.

So the parents of every child who does not attend Nursery should be asked why?

Gillyx

Fwiw I'm not against home schooling, children not attending nursery etc, but if the main reason behind it is for the sake of avoiding bullies and the not so nice things in life, for me, isn't what I'd say is best for the child.

POPPYOSCAR

Gillyx wrote: »

Fwiw I'm not against home schooling, children not attending nursery etc, but if the main reason behind it is for the sake of avoiding bullies and the not so nice things in life, for me, isn't what I'd say is best for the child.

I would agree in the main but for some children this may be necessary if they are being bullied and the school do not resolve the situation.

poet123

POPPYOSCAR wrote: »

So the parents of every child who does not attend Nursery should be asked why?

As it is a "free" service provided by the Govt I think it is legitimate to ask why some parents are not taking it up. I certainly don't think it meets the needs or wants of every parent (or child) and that should be known and accepted. Asking why should not mean pressure or judgement however.

Gillyx

POPPYOSCAR wrote: »

I would agree in the main but for some children this may be necessary if they are being bullied and the school do not resolve the situation.

It's not something I'd not consider if I had issues with bullying, but I wouldn't chose to do it on a what if basis. If that makes sense.

POPPYOSCAR

poet123 wrote: »

As it is a "free" service provided by the Govt I think it is legitimate to ask why some parents are not taking it up. I certainly don't think it meets the needs or wants of every parent (or child) and that should be known and accepted. Asking why should not mean pressure or judgement however.

I do not see how this protects the child though.

What 'reasons' would be acceptable to SS. Why indeed should any be given? it is offered, not compulsory, so who is to say what is an acceptable reason to not want to take it up.

POPPYOSCAR

Gillyx wrote: »

It's not something I'd not consider if I had issues with bullying, but I wouldn't chose to do it on a what if basis. If that makes sense.

Yes that makes perfect sense to me.

poet123

POPPYOSCAR wrote: »

I do not see how this protects the child though.

What 'reasons' would be acceptable to SS. Why indeed should any be given? it is offered, not compulsory, so who is to say what is an acceptable reason to not want to take it up.

I would doubt that SS would be involved simply and solely because a parent didn't want their child to attend nursery. It may be, as others have said, part of a bigger picture of removing the child from the sight of "authorities".

POPPYOSCAR

poet123 wrote: »

I would doubt that SS would be involved simply and solely because a parent didn't want their child to attend nursery. It may be, as others have said, part of a bigger picture of removing the child from the sight of "authorities".

I have personally been involved with SS with a friend and a family member which rather colours my judgement of them I am afraid!.