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The honest truth is that even though i still have feelings for him and i find it difficult to imagine my life without him in it i don't think that i can attempt to sort it out, he has lied too much to me this time, he refuses to tell me where he is staying as "i don't need to know" and i honestly don't think he can even lie straight in bed!0
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Who says you have to pretend to be ok?
Who says you have to pretend life is peachy?
Only you are saying this.
Life is obviously not ok and peachy at the moment as you're going through a crap time but who's caused the crap...... he has.
Why do you feel you need this person in your life?
Because he is just a habit......that's why. It's what you're used to in your every day life, that's why you're feeling such a sense of loss. But what have you lost? A cheating liar who has made you have no sense of self worth and that the only thing you feel your worthy of is to have him in your life. That's how people like this work.
Life will get better but it will take a little bit of time. It's not going to happen overnight.
I can't say whether or not it's too late for you to have children but can you honestly say that you would have children with this man even if you accepted him back into your life? I think not and if it did happen, do you really think that that would change him? Again..... I think not.
Please just allow yourself time to move on.....you're trying to push your feelings through way too fast. It's normal to feel that you've taken one step forward and 25 back but at least you have taken a step forward and it will get better.
Why can't you just be you? Nobody is stopping you but yourself.
By all means scream and shout and throw things but make it a photo of him so you don't have to have unnecessary contact with him and so you don't get done for assault!!
Come on, you can get through this. You are the one now in control not him, you're the one who is in the position to make a choice about your next move, not him.Onwards and Upwards0 -
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sadandbetrayed wrote: »
its stupid i know but this feels like my failure ! that i cant make it work
When my husband and I split, I felt like it was all MY fault too, and he was only too happy to take none of the blame. He was abusive, had cheated on me, and then expected me to have children with him when we had agreed from day dot that that was not what either of us wanted.
It takes two to make a relationship work, you are the one trying to make it work and fight for it, and he is just walking away. So, who do you really think is the failure?
In time, you will find someone who gives you the respect you deserve.0
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