Not being in the school clique! ***UPDATE***

Daddyto3

Right your'e gonna have to bear with me on this one, because it may get long....

My wife is absolutely furious at the mo, and to be honest all though i agree with her to a certain extent, i can't reason with her.....She is on a mission:rolleyes:

Heres the story. Our DD is making her First Holy Communion this year, and we have been really looking forward to it. We are going to come home afterwards and have a party for her with our families.

My wife was in the playground waiting for our daughter to come out of class the other day, and theres was about 3-4 mums stood next to hear, she overheard them talking about paying their next installments? Wife says, "ooh where you all off too, anywhere nice" There reply was "no wer'e talking about the money for the holy communion bash!" ..... it transpires that the whole year, barr about 3-4 have all pooled together and are having a huge party.

Now my wife isn't bothered about this at all, and tbh we wouldnt have gone if invited, BUT my wifes argument is, why wasn't our daughter invited? She asked this, and was told suchabody was organising it, and it was personal invitations only....!!!!

My wife is taking it personal, and cant believe that anybody would leave out any children in an event such as this!

She is very friendly with all the mothers in the year, but there is a clique of about 6-7, and these are the organisers.

I have told her to let them get on with it, but it's eating away at here, what do you all think????

(btw if this is in the wrong place, pls feel free to move!)

SSB

Hi
Sorry, but this is the way so many things are organised.... best revenge, organise something fabulous yourself. It is sometimes very difficult to explain it to the children though, I can understand how your wife feels.

ceebeeby

Hi Daddyto3,

There have been other similar threads to this one about children not invited to birthday parties etc. and each time it is heartbreakingly sad for those that have not been invited, and yes, sometimes seems almost cruel.

If your wife is friendly with the other parents, why did they not mention something sooner.

I presume your daughter is in a Catholic School, perhaps a word to the head-teacher or your daughter's Communion teacher or even your Priest to say how upset you are as a family that this has happened - it may not help this year, but a quiet word on Sunday from father may remind these parents of the requirement for community spirit, particularly at this very special day.

With regards to your daughter, I'm sure that whatever you choose to do on this day, it will be very special, and memorable. Our DD3's is in 3 weeks time, and she is sooooooo excited.

This suggestion won't take away the feeling of being snubbed, but hopefully will make you feel less cross.

I wish your daughter all the best for her special day x

Daddyto3

I know, but her argument is out of 28 in the year about 24 have had an invite. Surely no one would leave just 4 children out?
(that was in reply to almac, didnt see other replies at the time)

Lady_E

I can understand where your wife was coming from and agree that the special gang get to choose what is going to happen . I hate all this , I really do . Best advice is to rise above it , give your little girl a really good day and dont think about these spiteful people. Personally I think it is all about egos being massaged, and nothing to do with the children , who after all , it is their day . Good luck .

Daddyto3

If your wife is friendly with the other parents, why did they not mention something sooner.

This is what she can't understand, i mean we don't even want to go!!!!
BUT these other children, my wife on occasions as picked up from after-school clubs, dropped off at breakfast clubs, took to parties for others, picked up from Dancing classes etc, ect, etc,

We have only just found out about this *BASH* and she is livid!!!

ceebeeby

It's honestly not worth falling out with all the other Mum's over (you've still got another 10 years of schooling to go with them).

Would she feel better asking the 'organising' Mum why she did it? Perhaps even explaining how upset she feels that this has happened. It's so difficult, because I suspect that whatever the response is, won't really take away the hurt.

TBH though, your 'bash' sounds so much more fun anyway ... you'll have all your friends and family with you and be able to individually celebrate with your daughter.

Presumably all the children will be going to the hall after service for their juice and cake, so your daughter won't completely miss out.

Daddyto3

TBH she has already kicked off with a couple of mums along the lines off *if your face doesnt fit, your not in the click etc, etc* and about how disgusted she is.
And to be fair the other mums where just as surprised our dd wasn't invited!

We have a meeting this saturday after evening mass, and i know she can't wait!

I on the other hand, may have to stay at home I think....:o

Horasio

I don't know why you are bothering to post on here - you will get flamed and told you are in the wrong for feeling the way you do!

Bullies and cliques are everywhere and school seems to be a breeding place for that type of behaviour.

You have my sympathy - cliques consist of sad mindless sheep! Your wife has a mind of her own, and sheep don't like that! She should count herself thankful she is not in it!

Vive la difference!

Daddyto3

Presumably all the children will be going to the hall after service for their juice and cake, so your daughter won't completely miss out.

No, the PTA hasn't any money apparently for this, but that is a whole other story, sadly it's not like it was in *Our* day!

Daddyto3

You have my sympathy - cliques consist of sad mindless sheep! Your wife has a mind of her own, and sheep don't like that! She should count herself thankful she is not in it!

Thankyou. Thats what she realises, and tbh we know on the day that they will all be at this *bash* counting how many sausage rolls each of the other parents families have had, they will all be sat whispering about this and that, the kids will be running around all excited, girls getting tripped up over there HUGE frocks, boys sliding on their knees (why do they do that?)

Glad wer'e out of it all personally.