The poor relation

clearingout

zepsgal wrote: »

One family friend of mine has married a nice wealthy man. Going on about spending £3k+ on curtains for one room that their interior designer is having made for them.

Later I asked if the chicken she had bought was free range. Good god no! Cheapest of the cheap, you can't even taste the difference anyway!

Just shows what people are like. Thousands of pounds on curtains, but not even £1 more so a poor chicken can see a bit of daylight in its short life

There was a comment made about how they would never buy cheap crap curtains from Argos or Primark, oh no way! Words stung a bit as I looked at my nice Argos curtains hanging up At least I know I worked hard for all my possessions and furnishings, I didn't marry into 'nice' things x

this reminded me of a baby group I used to attend. Several of the mothers there were very well off and one morning were going on and out about how poor quality baby clothes from Tesco, Asda, Primark etc. are. One then looked at my child and said 'that's a lovely pair of jeans he's wearing. Where are they from?'. I took great pleasure in answering, honestly, 'Primark'. They were shame-faced for the rest of the morning and whilst I can't say it stopped them altogether, it's one of those things that I remember with a huge amount of....smugness!!!

Mojisola

clearingout wrote: »

this reminded me of a baby group I used to attend. Several of the mothers there were very well off and one morning were going on and out about how poor quality baby clothes from Tesco, Asda, Primark etc. are. One then looked at my child and said 'that's a lovely pair of jeans he's wearing. Where are they from?'. I took great pleasure in answering, honestly, 'Primark'. They were shame-faced for the rest of the morning and whilst I can't say it stopped them altogether, it's one of those things that I remember with a huge amount of....smugness!!!

Some groups do operate on this competitive level. I got talking to a woman about schools in our area. They had one child at a very expensive private school but her husband didn't think the hot-house environment would suit their other child. I told her the school our children went to and she asked why we hadn't sent them to private schools, I laughed and said we just didn't have that kind of money.

She was visibly shocked and it was quite funny to see the emotions go across her face - shock, embarrassment, relief. She then relaxed and said it was so hard trying to keep up with the social group they moved in - there was always someone just finishing a second or third degree, setting off on a massively expensive holiday, talking to publishers about the book they've written in their spare time, being head-hunted for an amazing new job - she already felt inadequate and was worried that if they sent their child to the local school, he would never be able to complete with that kind of crowd.

When I asked her why, if being with them wasn't making her happy, she wanted her children to have to join that kind of social set, she couldn't answer. She was so fixed on the idea of success in life being those things - highly-paid job, expensive houses and holidays, academic achievement, etc - that she couldn't imagine just doing what you wanted and enjoying life. Very sad.

thorsoak

Oh dear Muscle750 ....what you aren't saying is that you are ashamed of your daughter (didn't get a degree - got a baby and a hanging-on b/f) - and you're now trying to get them out of your house and expecting the taxpayer to support them whilst ranting on about parasites/immigrants .........

See https://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/discussion/4364467=

johnnyl

Muscle750 wrote: »

I'm getting abit sick and tired of listening to both my sister in law and my sister bragging on about their expensive holidays and how they are so looking forward to it and can't wait to get away from it best part of it neither of them have worked and its all what their husbands have earnt we haven't had a holiday now for 4 years life's a real struggle ones off on a 6 week cruise to the caribeean the others off for a month to the Far East I just feel we're having our noses rubbed in it best part my sis in law remarried and in my opinion was gold digging her first husband never did her any harm that I know of and she up and left and within a year she was remarried
We got a nice house and wonderfull children but I'm just sick of struggling and listening to tales of big holidays cars etc when I last saw my sis in law I was shown the latest acquirment the new cars not one but two we worked out at a cost of £50k I wouldn't mind it's just they won't bloody stop goin on about it all

ask yourself this. Are you happy with what you have?

If so, then this literally is all that matters. Just smile and humour them; if you are truly content with what you have (whatever it is that you value) then you wont be bothered with what others have / do / think etc

SuzieSue

thorsoak wrote: »

Oh dear Muscle750 ....what you aren't saying is that you are ashamed of your daughter (didn't get a degree - got a baby and a hanging-on b/f) - and you're now trying to get them out of your house and expecting the taxpayer to support them whilst ranting on about parasites/immigrants .........

See https://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/discussion/4364467=

Reading some of the OP's other posts, I can totally understand why she feels as she does about her SIL and sister as she seems very bitter about life in general. So even if they aren't deliberately rubbing her nose in it, she probably thinks they are. Unfortunately, until she changes her attitude to life in general, nothing we say is going to help.

C_Mababejive

It seems that they could be considerably richer than you..

Nicki

Do you know when I read this thread the first time I just assumed from the nature of the comments about the sister and sister in law that the OP was slightly spiteful !!!!!y woman. And now from the link that is posted it turns out that the OP is a male. And clearly a misogynist as well as a racist and all round charmer...