Lunch with Colleagues - don't know what to do

Nicki

I think you should have ignored the fact you dislike thingy and have a history with her. What would you have done if your best friend at work had paid by card and things then unfolded as they did? If you would have immediately assumed your best friend was a thief and started a witch hunt, then I guess you have been true to yourself. However if, as I suspect, you might have considered your best friend made an honest mistake and been more circumspect, then you ARE bullying thingy and have put yourself firmly in the wrong by sending that email.

gibson123

Any wrote: »

That's exactly what I would say to be honest.
There is not even much I could do exactly for those reasons. I am sure that the bosses above me wouldn't be happy if I spent my time investigating something that was done off company time.
And to deal with it I would have to call the restaurant to confirm the story at least.

I think my Managers and HR would take this view as well.

aneres

The Manager said the Waitress was new - could the girl you work with have given the waitress the tip and she pocketed it instead of putting it in the tip bowl/jar?

Any

Nicki wrote: »

I think you should have ignored the fact you dislike thingy and have a history with her. What would you have done if your best friend at work had paid by card and things then unfolded as they did? If you would have immediately assumed your best friend was a thief and started a witch hunt, then I guess you have been true to yourself. However if, as I suspect, you might have considered your best friend made an honest mistake and been more circumspect, then you ARE bullying thingy and have put yourself firmly in the wrong by sending that email.

While I agree with that concence (sp?), I think given the history I don't think OP could take the girl aside without getting another bullying complaint lodged.
I think it better come from someone without the history.
But I do hope it will be done sensitively!!

gibson123

Nicki wrote: »

I think you should have ignored the fact you dislike thingy and have a history with her. What would you have done if your best friend at work had paid by card and things then unfolded as they did? If you would have immediately assumed your best friend was a thief and started a witch hunt, then I guess you have been true to yourself. However if, as I suspect, you might have considered your best friend made an honest mistake and been more circumspect, then you ARE bullying thingy and have put yourself firmly in the wrong by sending that email.

Hardly, I have not accused her of anything, I have simply told my colleague the facts - that I went back to the restaurant and found out that Thingy only paid £116 and that I paid £30 to make up the tip, and asked her advice on how to approach her to get the money back... the reply I got was ... she did WHAT, wait until I see her tomorrow. I am sure this particular colleague will think it over carefully and come up with a decent approach, if I wanted to make trouble I would have e-mailed everyone.

Poppy9

sassyblue wrote: »

Not always. When you pay by debit/credit card you often have the option to add a tip before you put your PIN number in.

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but in this case the OP said it was all done in cash. Maybe the waitress did just pocket it and Thingy only avoided paying her share!

gibson123

aneres wrote: »

The Manager said the Waitress was new - could the girl you work with have given the waitress the tip and she pocketed it instead of putting it in the tip bowl/jar?

I suppose so, but if she had £30 in her purse why would she not just chuck her £15 cash on the table, rather than say she was going to the cash-line and then paying the whole bill by card.

Any

Poppy9 wrote: »

but in this case the OP said it was all done in cash. Maybe the waitress did just pocket it and Thingy only avoided paying her share!

But OP said that Thingy picked up the cash and paid by card?
Unless she left some cash behind, which the others would have seen?
Or perhaps she stayed behind and they wouldn't see it..

Poppy9

Out of curiosity how many of you work together. Was excluding one a big thing?

I am in an office of 36 and sometimes groups of us go off to lunch together. We used to email to invite everyone but it's always the same bunch so now we don't bother asking.

Poppy9

Any wrote: »

But OP said that Thingy picked up the cash and paid by card?
Unless she left some cash behind, which the others would have seen?
Or perhaps she stayed behind and they wouldn't see it..

Oh I read it as they had £135 in cash and Thingy was to pay an additional £15 by card to make up her share and a total payment of £150.

OP
The receipt you saw was it for £116 cash or £116 by card? If so did she then give the cash tip direct to waitress and keep the remainder of the cash as she had settled whole bill on her card?