'supporting each other through really tough times'

MrsCD

zoec1980 - You really have had an awful time of it, so please look after yourself, pet. It takes time to grieve the loss of a loved one so don't rush into anything. There are threads on MSE which can help you to save on your bills, but just take small steps - don't try to do everything at once.
Maybe after Christmas you could ask in the library about local groups you could go to - mother and toddler, knit and natter, coffee mornings etc., which would help.
Is it worth a visit to your GP to make sure you are fit and well yourself? It can take its toll on your body when you are under a lot of stress, so you need to eat healthily etc. and get enough sleep if you can.
Take care, pet, and keep popping in. There's always someone around to talk to here. x

MrsCD

unixgirluk wrote: »

Well I knitted my friend's scarf. It didn't take as long as I thought. But I have knitted it to the lady in the wool shops instructions and its very short. No way it would wrap round.Thinking of turning it into a neck warmer (i.e. adding a loop of elastic on one side and a large button). Now I don't have a button big enough. Short of spending money is their anything I could use as a button?

How about, instead of a button, you could use a shawl pin. You could make one from an old brooch or a big kilt pin. There are tutorials on You Tube for making crochet/knitted flowers etc. to fasten on to a pin. Or you could glue a novelty of some sort on instead.

monnagran

Zoec: You've come to the right place flower. The people on here are wise, supportive, loving and very funny. You will get sensible advice from people who have been in similar situations and can help you get through this. You will get loads of loving thoughts and prayers. You will get listening ears so that you can rant all you like if and when it helps.
But best of all you will get a brand new circle of friends who will give you more giggles than you've had for a long time.

I've only one piece of advice. Be very, very kind to yourself and take your time. No decisions until you feel better and have more energy.

Hugs

x

missrlr

zoec
Hugs
You are brave and strong
You need professional advice, both emotionally and legally. Here we will help, and perhaps you can make changes and only need one wage, here we ca help you maximise this option, but please you are distraught, you need real life help and assistance.
Oh and keep posting

mcculloch29

Such wonderful advice for Zoec, I can't add too much else.

It can be hard to see a way forward when you are swamped by life shattering events like this. But day by day, a path will emerge for you.

I hope that you can find some joy having your daughter to care for; small children love the simplest pleasures and sharing them with her will help you too.

Hugs, strength and comfort to you, Zoe.

stiltwalker

Zoec - big hugs and welcome aboard. You've had some cracking advice about making sure you look after yourself and no making decision too quickly or too rashly and I hope you'll join in this occasionally madcap supportive thread - looking forward to seing your posts.

Have to say I'm glad to see the back of this week - both kids poorly at the beginning of the week so that meant no nursery and I didn't have any activities planned for the back end of the week and manky weather put paid to any outdoor adventures anyway so DD is now officially 'past herself' - I'll spare you the details, save to say it was potty related, definately deliberate and not fun for mummy. DH asleep on the couch and snoring so I'm enjoying a cheeky glass of vino, a catch up ith some of my favourite peeps (you lot, you silly sausages!) and some food !!!!!! (Nigel Slater - been sitting on the sky box waiting for a time I need it) - I'm getting old!!! Time was I'd have been propping up the bar at this time on a Friday night - or possibly the other way round........

Anyhow, enough drivel from me - night all, stay safe and take care. X

kidcat

Stiltwalker a well deserved glass of wine by the sounds of it.

I rather enthusiastically got really excited after buying the trees today and made the decision to move most of the living room furniture around. Am working away still after almost eight hours and am still not finished - but am now committed to finish before DS8 gets up tomorrow, the idea of moving furniture with his "help" makes me weak at the knees

So far am very pleased with the results but beginning to wish I had thought of it weeks ago rather than now!
OH could not be persuaded to get the Christmas stuff out of the loft either which means that tomorrow I will need to bribe DS14 to do it with me so that we can get the tree set up at least - they are sitting in the hall all wrapped up at the moment:)

bluebag

Zoec

I have a bad time very similar to your own, it's exhausting.
I found I needed time to unplug from it all and surround myself with people who care for me and offer support.

I can't tell you what to do, we are all individual and have seperate and differing needs.
I found it good to be with positve people, and just take care of me and mine.

A talk with your GP may be helpful, mine was great and put me in touch with a support group that saved my sanity.

It's still very hard, it's still exhausting, but I feel better about getting out of bed and facing the day.
May your feet find the road to peace.
bb.

meme30

Jem:- Am sending you healing prayers, and hugs. Try and rest, it sounds like you have a lot of stuff to cope with.
Zoec:- Things are still very raw and fresh for you. Take time to be good to yourself, and enjoy your time with your DD. The people at your work are not important and that manager sounds like a waste of space to me. :mad: Take a few weeks over Christmas for yourself and then start to weigh up the work/childcare costs.
If nothing else our experiences with illness and loss show us how important living for ourselves is compared to living to work.

It's been lovely to read everyone's comments this morning, such a warm feeling of support.

Kidcat:- It sounds like one of those jobs you wished you never started!
Stiltwalker:-I'm pleased your children are feeling better, sounds like you deserved your glass of wine.

Twelve of us for lunch today, a pre-Christmas family get together. We will be wiped out by the time everyone leaves but it will be worth it. There is a takeaway and a vodka and tonic with my name on it waiting for me this evening.:D

kidcat

Morning toughies, am up early this morning to get everyone ready for our trip to the forest to see santa. Its a magical trip and for me it really helps me get into the festive spirit, I am just as excited as the kids.

Was up until four moving the furniture but am pleased with the results, the living room now needs a really good tidy and cleaning but the big stuff is all done.