13 yr old daughter dating a 17yr old

thehappybutterfly

~Chameleon~ wrote: »

I'm of a similar age and this is nothing new. It doesn't matter what your background is either, many of my peer group were sleeping around aged 13-14 even whilst at boarding school

Well it was very unusual at my school and it was a normal run of the mill school. I myself waited until I was 16 and only did it because I thought 'hmmm, I'm 16. I'd better get on with it'. I didn't want to DIE a virgin!

sharnad

Faith177 wrote: »

She isn't a child she is a teenager. I think anything over 13 I would automatically assume in this day and age for the person to be getting up to something. Now be that kissing or more that is down to the individual. I know I didn't sleep with anyone till after I was 16 but did stuff before that.

Of course he is getting some she allowed him from what I've read. More to the point a pervert, predator, pedo ect wouldn't hasn't stopped when she told him and that to me says a lot

A thirteen year old teenager is still a child.

thehappybutterfly

Faith177 wrote: »

But on the occasion there was no sex from what I could gather.

Teenagers are growing up quicker now and society needs to accept this and arm them with the knowledge on how too cope. My mum taught me most things when I was about 10 and I knew I could go to her with anything.

A lot of teenagers don't have this support due to outdated opinions that they just shouldn't be doing it so why do they need any help.

They just shouldn't be doing it - simple as. I hate the attitude that many people have these days - "well they're going to do it anyway - let's give them the support they need". No wonder there are so many teenage pregnancies/increases in abortions. Just don't get into trouble in the first place.

I can't help but think the increase in teenage pregnancies can be directly linked to the earlier delivery of sex education. If this 'improved' sex education is supposed to be teaching children how to keep safe/prevent pregnancy/prevent STDs etc. - it's not doing a very good job is it?

peachyprice

Faith177 wrote: »

Teenagers are growing up quicker now and society needs to accept

I don't actually think 'society' needs to accept this. I'd far rather 'society' let children be children.

I think it's terribly sad that children are being encouraged to grow up so quickly and actually quite sickening when you see 11-12yo girls so desparate to look and act 16.

Faith177

thehappybutterfly wrote: »

They just shouldn't be doing it - simple as. I hate the attitude that many people have these days - "well they're going to do it anyway - let's give them the support they need". No wonder there are so many teenage pregnancies/increases in abortions. Just don't get into trouble in the first place.

I can't help but think the increase in teenage pregnancies can be directly linked to the earlier delivery of sex education. If this 'improved' sex education is supposed to be teaching children how to keep safe/prevent pregnancy/prevent STDs etc. - it's not doing a very good job is it?

So you mean to tell me that you have NEVER done something you shouldn't?

They can still do it and not get in trouble if the necessary items to stop them getting into trouble are freely available.

I know that if my mum hadn't been open about things I never would have gone to her with a problem and that is what a lot of teenaged fce everyday.

When they need the help a lot of the time they are met with judgements or a million in one questions thy don't want to go through that so they try and deal on their own results in more trouble.

thehappybutterfly

Faith177 wrote: »

So you mean to tell me that you have NEVER done something you shouldn't?

They can still do it and not get in trouble if the necessary items to stop them getting into trouble are freely available.

I know that if my mum hadn't been open about things I never would have gone to her with a problem and that is what a lot of teenaged fce everyday.

When they need the help a lot of the time they are met with judgements or a million in one questions thy don't want to go through that so they try and deal on their own results in more trouble.

Pretty much! I'm very obedient when it comes to rules or the law. Which makes me sound very boring but I'm really not! I've never had a speeding ticket/been in trouble with the police/stole anything. I got a parking ticket once and nearly died of shame . I currently have a library fine and I'm so worried that I'll get banned that I think I might send in my 20YO son with my late books and pay the fine on my behalf. Then I'll stay away for a couple of months until they forget my face!

Off topic but I'm a real stickler for rules - family games are a laff-a-minute in my house. I don't care if you're three or 33 - you will follow the rules

xcarlyx

I would have thought the 17 year old would have known its wrong to touch a girl under 16.

sparklyshoe

Report him, I have a daughter and would do the same, if they think they can get away with it once......

Running_On_Empty

These are two teenagers doing what teenagers have done for millennia.
It's their hormones.
He isn't preying on a child, she's a willing participant.
The mother of the girl needs to inform her daughter exactly what will happen if she doesn't say no. And / or give her condoms.
The essential point here is to prevent an unwanted pregnancy and anything else is irrelevant.
It's six of one and half a dozen of the other.

Torry_Quine

Faith177 wrote: »

She isn't a child she is a teenager. I think anything over 13 I would automatically assume in this day and age for the person to be getting up to something. Now be that kissing or more that is down to the individual. I know I didn't sleep with anyone till after I was 16 but did stuff before that.

Of course he is getting some she allowed him from what I've read. More to the point a pervert, predator, pedo ect wouldn't hasn't stopped when she told him and that to me says a lot

She may be a teenager but she's still a child and under the age of consent!

thehappybutterfly wrote: »

To me it doesn't matter if a 13 year old girl 'consents' to s e x with an older boy/man. It's statutory rape. The age of consent is 16 for a reason - any younger and they don't have the maturity to make a decision like that. Regardless of how mature we as parents or they themselves think they are. They're children at the end of the day.

I AM old fashioned and proud of it. I'm only in my early 40's, I'm outgoing, fun-lovin' and don't act my age but I do have strong morals and I'm dismayed at the casual attitude many people have towards sexual activity. Kids are starting far too young, doing it with too many people and not taking any responsibility for contraception. I really worry for some of these kids.

Couldn't have put it better.

I think it very sad when some make comments to the extent that we should expect children to be having sex. We should do all we can to prevent them behaving in adult ways too soon.