My daughter has been detained :( .........UPDATE!

pollypenny

Tea bag, you are not a failure. You have worked hard and supported your daughter, but she clearly needs more help.

All the very best to you and her.

heartbreak_star

Aw hun, you're not a failure - quite the opposite in fact, you sound like a great mum!

As previous posters have said, your DD is in the best place, they will help her.

Lots of love!

HBS x

thorsoak

I can understand how devastated you feel about the fact that your poor daughter has been detained - but this may well be the start of the help that you have asked for and been denied for so long!

You aren't a bad mother - you have done the best that you possibly can do for your daughter and the other childen - you haven't been given the support that you should have received - either from officials or from your OH - and with your mother seriously ill at the same time, I'm filled with admiration at the way you are coping with everything.

Good luck - hopefully now your daughter will receive the help and support she so desperately needs - and this will be the start of something good. {{hugs}}

Jojo_the_Tightfisted

This may sound harsh to you, but I would imagine that her admission is a relief for your other children. Please, use the time to catch up on sleep, relax and devote time to them, as they must miss your involvement due to your eldest requiring the largest amount of attention.

Take the time to enjoy uninterrupted moments with them before they only have memories of their sister needing all of your attention all of the time.

You can't control somebody becoming ill, you can't change the fact that she needs admission, but you can choose whether to focus on this being a disaster or an opportunity for her to get the treatment she so desperately needs at the same time as strengthening your relationship with your other children.

daska

Jojo_the_Tightfisted wrote: »

This may sound harsh to you, but I would imagine that her admission is a relief for your other children. Please, use the time to catch up on sleep, relax and devote time to them, as they must miss your involvement due to your eldest requiring the largest amount of attention.

Take the time to enjoy uninterrupted moments with them before they only have memories of their sister needing all of your attention all of the time.

You can't control somebody becoming ill, you can't change the fact that she needs admission, but you can choose whether to focus on this being a disaster or an opportunity for her to get the treatment she so desperately needs at the same time as strengthening your relationship with your other children.

^^^^^^

Hear! Hear!

sassyblue

teabag you are NOT a failure. You've got an awful lot to cope with and many women would have buckled by now but here you are still coping best you can. Your daughter will hopefully get the help she needs now, it should have been a long time ago by the sounds of it and you yourself have been let down.

Hoping you get the help and advice you all need, especially your daughter. xx

teabag29

Hi guys thanks for your support, feeling a bit better today after speaking to her on the phone. My only worry now is that they will release her too soon as she seems to be enjoying it there and not at all low, apparently she will be there a week and then there will be a meeting to see if they feel she is not a risk to herself, thing is she isnt gonna appear as a risk in there because she is happy and not being bullied or given any demands (she has pathalogical demand avoidance syndrome). The way camhs were speaking is she is in there short term (a week) to calm herself down and not feeling like killing herself anymore, but im concerned she needs alot deeper help or she will be exactly the same when she comes out and that work cant be done in just 1 week.

CH27

Will you have the opportunity to meet with staff & voice your concerns?

pollypenny

As others have said, try to recoup your energies and give the other kids some time during this period of respite.

Hope there will be some structured support for her and the rest of the family when she does come out.

POPPYOSCAR

I am glad you are feeling better today.


See you did the right thing and she is ok.:)

I do not know anything about these things but I hope someone who does can advise you how to get the authorities to listen to your concerns and act on it.