Son being bullied/assulted at high school

ANNIEHAHA

My son has just gone back to school yr 8, toward the end of yr 7 he experienced older boys being rough, he was slapped, punched etc in school between lessons and on the bus.

He decided to go back rather than change schools, after 5 days in he has been experiencing it again, the boys are yr 8-10.

He is taking the longest route to classes to avoid them, and tries to avoid them at break/lunch. If he sees them coming he turns and goes another way.

The other day he was coming out of class and the next thing he knew he had been spun and thrown on the floor, he didnt see it coming, this was a year 9 boy.

He does not want me to contact the school but I have, I will be attending a meeting with his head of house to see what they can put in place and filled out transfer forms to move to another school.

I have taken 3 photos, one of a bite on his side torso, a bruise on his leg and a red mark on his chest. I fear the damage has been done psychologically, he does not feel safe in school.

I does not help his sister has gone to another school and is very happy there!

My question is how soon can I move him? can they speed the application through? I live in Norfolk

kingfisherblue

I'm sorry to hear about your son. My son is the same age and is also being bullied, but the physical assaults have not been as severe. Last term I was in school two or three evenings a week and I requested a copy of the school's bullying policy.

I was back in school yesterday and I told the head of house that I wasn't prepared to put up with another year of this for my son. My child is now keeping a diary of events and I am prepared to take this to the LEA if necessary.

In my area, physical assaults are reporteed to the LEA by the school. If this is the case in your area, could you use this to speed up the transfer?

My son has decided not to move schools, but his school are aware that this is a path I will take if I have to. It's a horrible time for your son and for you as his parent. I wish you both luck x

oligeo

Hi I didn't want to read and run, but can offer no real constructive advice as I don't know the process.
It must be awful for your son to go through that, and for you too, sending him off to school each morning must be breaking your heart.
The school should be doing something drastic about this situation, and your son should not be left alone to walk between lessons, a member of staff should be watching out for him, this sounds a lot more serious than your run of the mill teasing.
I hope you get a more helpful answer soon.

faerie~spangles

If my son came home from school with a bite mark on his torso it would be the police I would be calling before even thinking of contacting the school.

meritaten

If your son is not safe in school then it is a valid reason not for him to return, until the school can 'assure' both of you of his safety. I would phone your alternative choice of school and ask for a meeting with the headmaster asap. Assuming there is a place for him I would explain exactly what has happened and show the pics. I do hope you can get him a place Immediately! This is absolutely awful - it happened many years ago to my son, so I know how you feel. Feel free to PM me if I can help in any way. There are other avenues you can go down hun.

mazza111

And in the mean time can't they let him out of class a few minutes early so he's not in the corridors at the same time as these idiots? I know it's only going to stop the in school stuff but... Sad days when kids behave like this

tescovaluecrisps

Oh my goodness if he has been bit take him straight out, complain to the police and the school and try and get him in somewhere else these kids are vile! It must be difficult when they are in secondary school. I have had issues in primary with my son but have always gone straight to the mothers and that has always sorted it. But when they are older its very different, I am really sorry your son is going through this and I hope you can get him moved before it causes emotional problems xxx

mrs_sparrow

Seriously, he has bite marks. Are they still there? I would be calling the police tonight if your son still has marks.

And the I would stop sending him to that school for now and would be speaking to the new school in the morning to see if they had a space. Can you home school him until a place at the new school comes up?

savingmummy

I would be outraged if i knew my child was doing this!!
Have the parents been informed?

Our local secondary school often have the police support workers visit the bullies seems to help a lot.


No advice on how long it will take but wish your son all the very best for the future.

sassyblue

Your poor son.

If it were my son he wouldn't be going back, the police would be informed and I would be in touch with the other parents (if you know who they were) to tell them what thugs they are raising.

Don't go in asking questions, go in wanting answers and action.

Corelli

Hi,

I would echo what the others have said, if its not safe for him at school keep him way until they can guarantee he is safe there. We've been through bullying and it can ruin lives. Well done you for taking action, we delayed too long as my boy was afraid the repercussions would be worse if adults got involved. Which is probably your son's motive for not wanting you to go to the school.

So you need to be very sure of what the school and police can do. See how your son feels about the proposals too. And of course, changing schools could be an option but if he otherwise likes this school it does feel like the bullies have won this round.

I am going to say something as well and I want to be very careful how I say this because it could be interpreted as victim blaming and it is very definitely not meant that way.

Is there anything about the way your boy responds to teasing that provokes the bullies, or makes him more 'fun' to attack than others? Some people by their whole body language can look like a victim to an attacker. Walking tall and strong with head held high stops a person looking vulnerable. It can be worth practising non commital responses to verbal abuse.

Wishing you and your son and all the family the very best in dealing with this.