Anybody similar to me and have no family to speak of?

Rochdale_Guy

FAO Angelic - interesting avatar you have there.

Do you mind if I take a bite?

GobbledyGook

I am in a similar position. My only blood relations other than my children are my cousin, who I am close too but live hours away from, her children who are all under 8 and my father's family who I don't know and don't want to know.

My parents were awful, my grandparents brought my brother and I up. Mother died when I was 14, brother when I was 17 and both grandparents when I was in my 20's. I hadn't seen my father since I was 14 and he died last week.

The only other family I have is my ex brother-in-law who I am very close too and my ex husband. I used to be close to my parents-in-law, but that's long gone now.

Lots of relatives isn't always all it's cracked up to be. My father had parents, two sisters and a brother all around close when I was a child. Not one of them stepped in when he abused us or kept in touch/had any interest in us when we were removed.

Quality in the people around you is much, much, much more valuable than quantity imo.

JustKeepSwimming_2

I understand how you feel, I think.

I've not read your other thread (as I'm not looking for a nerdy girl to date ) but I'll pop over & read it later.

I have very little family, being an only child & having a mother who frankly "isn't interested in being a mother & never really has been". Her words, not mine. We meet up once or twice a year (she is some way away) for duty's sake, but it is a strain for both of us & sometimes I wish I had the courage to stop. I have no other family from her side as they choose not to speak to us as part of an ongoing family saga over a will. Sigh.

I have an aunt & uncle & 3 cousins from my Dad's side (my Dad died 8 years ago), but we are not close either. My aunt & uncle aren't well & although I've offered to help out many times they just don't want to know. I think they get enough help from my 3 cousins & their respective families, for which I'm thankful, but I'm also sad that I rarely see them. I have suggested meeting my female cousin several times for a coffee but it never happens. In fact today I sent a text to her today suggesting we meet but no reply... I always send birthday/Christmas cards, but rarely get any back, which I try not to let bother me but it does hurt if I'm honest.

Having split up with a long term partner some months ago, I now find I'm missing his family even more then him - they ignore me if I see them in town. They obviously don't know the whole story (or they'd be ignoring him not me ) but I'm not going to tell them. Blood is thicker & all that....

OP I don't know what the answer is, sorry. And I've waffled on a bit here too, sorry.... I do try & remind myself to be grateful that I don't have all these extra people to please, & that I can go away at the drop of a hat (when my kids are at their Dad's anyway) & that Xmas alone can be fun - but it is darn hard sometimes. It isn't always fun doing it all by yourself. I miss having someone to fight my corner, laugh with me & jsut help out & I am often envious of those that do have family.

OP - I'm probably not cheering you up, am I? I guess my only advice (FWIW) is to plan for the worst but hope for the best. Look after your friends (which is hard if they all have families I know) & try to be happy in yourself. That sounds really trite - but I can't think of the words...

shegirl

babymad wrote: »

Unfortunately, I have no advice but you are not alone. Both my parents died before I had left my teens, my grandparents are also all dead and my lovely brother, who had qualified as a doctor, died in 2009 after drowning when on holiday.

Words can't even express how much I miss them all x

OPTIMUSNEMESIS MEET BABYMAD.

She,like you has no family (nor do I but I'm introducing you two for a reason..)

She also has no partner and has been unable to find one,despite trying many avenues.

She also is worried about never having a family and,such is her desire to have one,she's considering sperm banks and going it alone because she doesn't think she'll meet anyone in time.

She's a deputy head teacher who is self sufficient and owns her own home.

Now,why don't you pair in such a similar predicament have a chat and see if there's any chance

Oh,and if there are bells and pattering footsteps I'd like to be acknowledged

Rochdale_Guy

shegirl wrote: »

OPTIMUSNEMESIS MEET BABYMAD.

She,like you has no family (nor do I but I'm introducing you two for a reason..)

She also has no partner and has been unable to find one,despite trying many avenues.

She also is worried about never having a family and,such is her desire to have one,she's considering sperm banks and going it alone because she doesn't think she'll meet anyone in time.

She's a deputy head teacher who is self sufficient and owns her own home.

Now,why don't you pair in such a similar predicament have a chat and see if there's any chance

Oh,and if there are bells and pattering footsteps I'd like to be acknowledged

Crike, you're not putting too much pressure on them then I see? :rotfl:

shegirl

Rochdale_Guy wrote: »

Crike, you're not putting too much pressure on them then I see? :rotfl:

Well,worth a try,right?! LOL

Erinnire

shegirl wrote: »

OPTIMUSNEMESIS MEET BABYMAD.

She,like you has no family (nor do I but I'm introducing you two for a reason..)

She also has no partner and has been unable to find one,despite trying many avenues.

She also is worried about never having a family and,such is her desire to have one,she's considering sperm banks and going it alone because she doesn't think she'll meet anyone in time.

She's a deputy head teacher who is self sufficient and owns her own home.

Now,why don't you pair in such a similar predicament have a chat and see if there's any chance

Oh,and if there are bells and pattering footsteps I'd like to be acknowledged

Matchmaker Shegirl in the house!

I don't really have much of a family... My Mum and step-dad live 150 miles away and I'm rarely in touch with any of my wider family especially after the big family breakdown recently.

I've always wanted a big family christmas, generations together celebrating and enjoying eachothers company. The season being about love and togetherness and not about presents or the commericalism (spelling!)

Rochdale_Guy

shegirl wrote: »

Well,worth a try,right?! LOL

Of course it is! You go girl :j :T

shegirl

Erinnire wrote: »

Matchmaker Shegirl in the house!

I don't really have much of a family... My Mum and step-dad live 150 miles away and I'm rarely in touch with any of my wider family especially after the big family breakdown recently.

I've always wanted a big family christmas, generations together celebrating and enjoying eachothers company. The season being about love and togetherness and not about presents or the commericalism (spelling!)

I'd love a family Christmas like in the older films,even with singing carols/Christmas songs around the piano!

Rochdale_Guy

Of course I meant you! LOL :rotfl:

Wow, what an invite! How can I refuse such a tempting offer? Be warned though, I am ravenous