Pre empting noisy neighbour and asking them to keep it down?

carpedieme

I work permanent night duty, have done for over ten years. I have never expected neighbours or anyone else for that matter to tiptoe around especially at the weekend just because I work nightshifts. I think it was cheeky of you and suggest your husband gets some ear plugs or changes his shifts:D Sorry if it isnt what you want to hear but you did ask:p

Jojo_the_Tightfisted

Sounds OK to me - where I used to live, the bloke downstairs would knock and let me know he was on nights, that way I knew and would switch the washing machine and dishwasher on at about 4pm instead of 8am and vacuum at about 6pm. It made no difference to me, my next door neighbour saw nothing wrong in vacuuming at 2am :mad: so I had no qualms about whether this disturbed her watching Neighbours, and the place was no more messy for swapping things around a bit.

A big smile and a thank you will be remembered as well. It was the way he showed he appreciated it that made me more likely to alter things a bit for him. Had I been ordered or moaned at, I wouldn't have changed a thing.

Valli

Mrs_Arcanum wrote: »

Think your approach was the right one. Pre-empting a situation means you speak from a positive frame of mind rather than angry.

I'm with this; you know the neighbours, asked them nicely to be aware that your OH was just in having worked nights and said that you'd appreciate silence 'until lunchtime' - not all day so more than reasonable to ask.

Moreover this is a one-off - your hubby is temporarily on nights.

And 9am is not early on a Saturday for anyone with younger children.

mummyroysof3

i wouldnt mind next door doing the same thing...i dont think its cheaky as you all get on ok and it doesnt happen often

TheConways

For comparison, try living in Switzerland. There are strict rules on noise here, which include (especially in German-speaking parts)

- No housework after 9pm that would make a noise (hoovering; washing machine running; noisy dishwasher; moving furniture around)
- Roadworks/building work permitted from 7am (!)
- No flushing your toilet or running a bath after 9pm
- No DIY after 9pm or on Sundays, including mowing your lawn. That's for Saturdays only. (Also note that all shops are closed on Sundays)
- Excessive noise from partying, shouting, music, musical instruments, TV is banned after 9pm
- Dogs are to refrain from excessive barking at all times


Hmm.

Mr_Toad

TheConways wrote: »

For comparison, try living in Switzerland. There are strict rules on noise here, which include (especially in German-speaking parts)

- No housework after 9pm that would make a noise (hoovering; washing machine running; noisy dishwasher; moving furniture around)
- Roadworks/building work permitted from 7am (!)
- No flushing your toilet or running a bath after 9pm
- No DIY after 9pm or on Sundays, including mowing your lawn. That's for Saturdays only. (Also note that all shops are closed on Sundays)
- Excessive noise from partying, shouting, music, musical instruments, TV is banned after 9pm
- Dogs are to refrain from excessive barking at all times


Hmm.

It's to prevent avalanches you know

FBaby

We live in a cul de sac and my kids like to play in the middle. I always remind them that this is a neighborhood and they therefore need to watch the noise they make. It's nothing to do with 'public road' vs 'own garden', it's about respecting neighbours.

If one of my neighbour came to me and very gently and politely asked me if I'd mind just watching my kids, not that they remained totally quiet, but that don't scream, play noisy games etc..., all said without expectation, just gratitude, I wouldn't find it cheeky at all and would be happy to oblige.

NewKittenHelp

I would probably be OK with your request when you first asked, but I definitely wouldn't think of you in the same way for the future and there would definitely be some cooling between us.

My adjoining neighbour moved in and started having late-night, loud parties nearly every weekend and saw that as her God-given right. Then she had a baby, and the parties stopped, but on the occasions when we had a party (four times a year max and always on a Saturday) she kicked off. Now her son is older, she's back to her old tricks as is he. They basically make our dining room unusable for evenings and she doesn't care.

In all other respects we get on OK as neighbours, but there is a stand-offishness because of her behaviour that cannot be repaired. We have close friendships with our other neighbours and next-door-but-ones and we all help each other out, but our adjoining neighbour doesn't have that. To the extent that when she was broken into last year, no one bothered to offer her help because she'd isolated herself so much, and people didn't want to go out of their way to help someone like her.

I'm not comparing you to my neighbour, but I am saying that you will probably be under a higher than usual level of scrutiny from this day forward and if you do anything deemed even slightly unreasonable, it will probably begin the end of the good relationship you enjoyed with your neighbours.

Fire_Fox

masonn wrote: »

Sleeping during the day isn't natural and those of us who do it do *not* have the right to ask the rest of the world to shut up and let us sleep. When I'm working days my evenings and nights are very peaceful and I do enjoy that peace.

Daytime is a different matter, it's when the normal world works and plays. Life and Children can be noisy, as can some adults and there are socially acceptable limits but children do run about screaming and laughing.

It's a very selfish person who thinks the rest of the world should be quiet just because they don't like noise.

So you think doctors and nurses who work nights are selfish, unnatural and abnormal? And you'd be happy to be treated by one who is chronically sleep deprived? What about police officers, soldiers, firemen, other hospital staff, care workers, people who clean the roads, repair tube and train lines? If the only people who worked shifts/ nights were those who slept soundly in the day we'd need conscription for all these work roles and we'd have to increase taxes to pay for all the unemployed people.

IMO it's a very selfish person who doesn't consider others and just make noise, or inflicts their breeding decisions on those around them. Why should your right to have fun trump someone else's right to restful sleep or peace and quiet? Don't you know any ways to have fun that aren't noisy? :eek:

Idiophreak

masonn wrote: »

Sleeping during the day isn't natural and those of us who do it do *not* have the right to ask the rest of the world to shut up and let us sleep.
...
It's a very selfish person who thinks the rest of the world should be quiet just because they don't like noise.

It's a selfish person who thinks other people should have to listen to their noise.

It's much like smokers who think other people are selfish for not liking smoke puffed in their faces...I tend to take the view that whoever's doing the thing that's impacting on the other person's life probably is the one in the wrong.

I've got a lovely home cinema system at home, but living in a flat, I've the sub turned right down and don't use the thing on loud. Now, should I just turn it up to the maximum, and when my neighbours complain say "you're so selfish...just because you don't like noise!"...sure that'll go down great...