Pre empting noisy neighbour and asking them to keep it down?

TheConways

Perfectly reasonable - it's a short term request, and reasonable to ask.

Compare and contrast with our neighbour who knocked on the door at 10pm the other night (hubster and I were enjoying a romantic meal in and looking at wedding photos to celebrate our first wedding anniversary).

She immediately started with the phrase "That's not alright!" (no "Hi", "Hello", "Sorry to bother you") and launched into a tirade about my shoes making a clacking noise on the wooden floor. I had ballet shoes on which I often use as slippers. She lives UPSTAIRS (we have a garden flat). Crazy, crazy woman, and I have little desire to be neighbourly. (Incidentally, this was the second time we had met as we've just moved).

*That* is mad, not your polite request to the neighbour.

KxMx

Well since you and your neighbours seem ok with it, I don't see any problem.

But honestly, I sleep alot in the afternoon, and would never dream of asking my neighbours to keep it down, because they are making noise at a normal time whereas I am sleeping at an abnormal time.

Therefore i'd feel I was being unreasonable if I was expecting them to hush up!

I just put up with the noise and sleep as best I can.

Mr_Toad

I disagree.

I worked shifts and was on call for 28 years and I would never ask neighbours to be quiet so I could sleep.

I'm sure judging by the other replies that you don't agree but it does have a whiff of selfishness about it, the many being asked to sacrifice for the one.

It was a weekend, people's play time and for children, and some adults, that means being out and making some noise and letting off steam. We all have a right to that without being asked to keep quiet or made to feel guilty.

Why should we expect other people to tip toe about because we work shifts? They have a right to enjoy their time and make some noise if they want.

That's what ear plugs are for.

It is also the reason why shift work isn't suitable for everyone. Some people never get used to sleeping in the day but they should expect others to walk on eggshells while they are in bed.

lostinrates

My neighbours and i both start work really early in the mornoing, so our noise doesn't bother each other, but i have been known to mention we have someone staying who will sleep in, and i notice they make effort to keep their noise down. Seems to me common sense to try and give neighbours a decent quality of life. Likewise we always let eqch other know in advance if we are planning a late loud night. (and often issue an invitation). That way if they are having a party we can go out for a meal, or vice versa.

Idiophreak

masonn wrote: »

I disagree.

I worked shifts and was on call for 28 years and I would never ask neighbours to be quiet so I could sleep.

I'm sure judging by the other replies that you don't agree but it does have a whiff of selfishness about it, the many being asked to sacrifice for the one.

It was a weekend, people's play time and for children, and some adults, that means being out and making some noise and letting off steam. We all have a right to that without being asked to keep quiet or made to feel guilty.

Why should we expect other people to tip toe about because we work shifts? They have a right to enjoy their time and make some noise if they want.

That's what ear plugs are for.

It is also the reason why shift work isn't suitable for everyone. Some people never get used to sleeping in the day but they should expect others to walk on eggshells while they are in bed.

So people don't have a right to enjoy some peace and quiet in their own house, without resorting to earplugs?

Sorry, I don't believe people have the right to make noise that impacts on the lives of others. Yes, sometimes you need to hoover, sometimes you need to mow the lawn...these are things that *need* to be done, and I think most people tolerate them as long as they're done reasonably...But A garden 5m away from another home is absolutely *not* the place to go to "let of steam"...if you want your children to be able to run and scream about, take them to a park where they can do it without ruining your neighbours' enjoyment of their own homes.

FunWithFlags

I think it's cheeky. If it was night time or something, then I think that would be fine but I don't see why other people should have to alter their lives to fit someone else's sleeping habits in the middle of the day.

Fire_Fox

I don't think it is unreasonable as an occasional thing to ask a neighbour to keep the noise down. But do invest in some wax ear plugs - they are super comfortable and very effective.

splishsplash

I think I would find it cheeky too.

You'll be able to judge, OP, what your neighbours really thought about your early morning visit (9am on a Saturday morning, really??) over the coming weeks. If you notice a cooling off from them, then you can take it that, gracious as they appeared, they also took offence.

Acc72

It clearly worked for you, in your specific circumstances with your specific neighbours (just because this may not have worked for somebody else doesn't make it wrong).

Assuming that you are equally accomodating of any such requests from your neighbours I don't see a problem.

Mr_Toad

Idiophreak wrote: »

So people don't have a right to enjoy some peace and quiet in their own house, without resorting to earplugs?

Sorry, I don't believe people have the right to make noise that impacts on the lives of others. Yes, sometimes you need to hoover, sometimes you need to mow the lawn...these are things that *need* to be done, and I think most people tolerate them as long as they're done reasonably...But A garden 5m away from another home is absolutely *not* the place to go to "let of steam"...if you want your children to be able to run and scream about, take them to a park where they can do it without ruining your neighbours' enjoyment of their own homes.

Sleeping during the day isn't natural and those of us who do it do *not* have the right to ask the rest of the world to shut up and let us sleep. When I'm working days my evenings and nights are very peaceful and I do enjoy that peace.

Daytime is a different matter, it's when the normal world works and plays. Life and Children can be noisy, as can some adults and there are socially acceptable limits but children do run about screaming and laughing.

It's a very selfish person who thinks the rest of the world should be quiet just because they don't like noise.