Is this assault?

thatgirlsam

OP I'm a fiesty female and I have to say anyone throwing a drink into my face would have hell to pay, son or no son

I have a son who I love, cherish, and adore but at the point when he throws a drink in my face then he becomes a man who threw a drink in my face - and I do not accept that behaviour in my life. I wouldn't do that to anyone.

Op, I am worried about saying this next bit cos it sounds like blaming and I don't want it to - but.. did you spoil him as a child, did you let him think that Mum would accept him however?
That's where I don't want to go wrong with my boy.. I love him, but there is a limit to what tolerate. From ANYONE.

i hope you can work this out. Violence is never right.

System

Feeling ever so guilty for once throwing a drink over my ex now...

Taadaa

My brother used to get irrationally angry..not to the point if physical aggression, but shouting and swearing and starting rows. It took him until he was 20 to admit he he's gay and finding it hard to cope with it.

If he isn't ill there is an underlying problem he needs help with. Last time he threw the drink. This time he threw the drink and smashed the glass. What next?

Sooki

nationaldomesticviolencehelpline

Please find info for the national dv helpline, (im not sure if i can post links so ive only put the main body of the address on) you might find this a useful place to get support. The number for women's aid is on this too, they are very helpful and have also refuges if you should ever have a need of one.

Also if you already haven't please speak with your local police liaison officer when you are not in a crisis incident, the police have family support units and may also be able to offer some useful advice and assistance.

Hope things work out out for you, it's sounds like your having an awful time.

bestpud

I once threw a glass of squash over my husband but I didn't smash the glass or rant for ages afterwards - I realised we had serious issues that were making us both act in uncharacteristic ways and we split up shortly after. It's never acceptable and that one incident made me wake up and smell the coffee.

Your son doesn't actually have a problem with his behaviour, OP. If he did, he'd change it!

Why doesn't he have a problem with it? Because his family allow him to think it is ok!!

As a mother of two daughters, my blood runs cold when I read your posts.

When he seriously hurts someone, which he will, I think they should get the insipid, moronic bloody parents like you in the dock too!

I know he is the offender dah de dah, but you are allowing him to repeat this pattern and you know he will one day harm a partner and/or a child!!

Seriously, get a grip!!

claire16c

I would have thrown him out the minute I found out he had hit his girlfriend.

ellay864

OP I really hope you have the family support to take action as it will be hard for you. My mum ended up taking out an injunction against my brother when he was 17 due to his violence. She was slammed by a lot of people for doing it as brother put on a completely different persona outside our house. I was terrified of him (I'm 2 years older) as his mood swings and outbursts got more unpredictable.
Although he had been getting into trouble from teenage years, despite my mum and dad trying everything to stop him, it was like he pressed a self destruct button after our dad died when he was 15. Allowances were made for grief, mum persuaded him to see a counsellor but a person has to take resposibility for their own actions. About a year after mum threw him out we found out he'd been on drugs for a year before that and yet there'd been no sign, we'd looked but he hid it well.
He needs help, but you need help too and the rest of your family need him out of their lives while he poses a physical danger. Yes it will be do hard for you and I saw what it did to my mum but it got to the point she had no option. I think you're at that point too. Good luck

paddy's_mum

Mindless_Clone wrote: »

It's hard to ask any mother to do this to their son



OP, I am sorry you are in this position and I wish you strength to deal with this as you know you must.

Good post but I've corrected the bit above which surely should read "for their son".

I too wish the OP strength, courage and enough love to try to save the son from himself.

Wootball

I'd just like to post here before someone decides to use the completely moronic, age-old and disproven excuse that he plays video games as a reason for him being a d*ckhead.

Misstress wrote: »

Is the above bold the problem? Has he an addiction to computer games? Violent ones?

Oh, dammit.

Lotus-eater

Wootball wrote: »

I'd just like to post here before someone decides to use the completely moronic, age-old and disproven excuse that he plays video games as a reason for him being a d*ckhead.



Oh, dammit.

I was also thinking along those lines.