DD won £5k - should she share it?

gravitytolls

Dunroamin wrote: »

I'm an only child as well and often don't "get" sibling relationships but I know that when my dad won on the horses or my mum won at bingo there were always treats for the other two and some degree of sharing.

If any one of us had had major good fortune, the others would never have had to worry about money again. That's my idea of how families work.

I pretty much agree, but the OP's offspring's win is rather minor in comparison to never worrying about money again.

But you're right, if one comes into a jackpot win, other family members will always have a roof over their head, of their own and would never be in need.

faerie~spangles

dandy-candy wrote: »

A bit of a weird situation has come up the DH and I disagree on!

We have 3 kids and my FIL bought them all equal amounts of Premium bonds a few years ago. DD is 13 and last month she had a number come up and won £5000. I cashed it in and told her to buy something special (she got an Ipod) and the rest i've put in her building society savings account.

DH has twice now said he thinks she should share her win with her brothers but I disagree, I think what she wins should be hers.

They have all won odd £25 - £100 pounds before and they have all kept what ever they individually won as more bonds. Because this was a large win I thought it better in the savings account.

What do you think? Should each kid keep what their bonds won or should it be pooled and shared equally?

The rewards of the bonds are hers and hers alone irrespective of the value.

crochet_2

Dunroamin wrote: »

Definitely not "made to" but I'd be ashamed if a child of mine didn't want to share; I'd feel I'd done something wrong in her upbringing.

There is a difference between theft and someone offering a small gift from their own free will. What the OP is suggesting is theft and completely unfair.

Dunroamin

crochet wrote: »

There is a difference between theft and someone offering a small gift from their own free will. What the OP is suggesting is theft and completely unfair.

Theft - what is the OP suggesting?

busiscoming2

OP - I'm with you, it's probably what I would have done as well. It was her 'luck' that allowed her to win, not the others this time.

crochet_2

Dunroamin wrote: »

Theft - what is the OP suggesting?

The OP's partner.

Tina20

Am I the only one who thinks it a bit outrageous that if the child won 1mil the mother would buy a house?

What if the child doesn't want a house?? What if he/she gets to adulthood and is lumbered with a property they dont want or can't maintain it? It would have to be in the parents name wouldn't it?

That just can't be right! How can you say '5k is her money' but 1mil is the parents to spend on a house! Double standards!

aliasojo

Tina20 wrote: »

Am I the only one who thinks it a bit outrageous that if the child won 1mil the mother would buy a house?

To be fair though, at least the OP is trying to please everyone whilst still letting the child retain ownership.

Whereas Dad just wanted to take the money for them.

tyllwyd

The DD has won £5K and might never win again. The others have always kept their smaller winnings and not shared. So what will happen if they win £5K in total, but made up of smaller amounts and spread over a longer time, will they be asked to share as well? You have to have the same rules for everyone, either you share everything or nothing.

Welshwoofs

Dunroamin wrote: »

If any one of us had had major good fortune, the others would never have had to worry about money again. That's my idea of how families work.

Sure, if everyone in the family buys into the same ethos. But in this case all previous wins have NOT been shared, yet the girl is expected to share this one. So the ethos here seems to be "What's mine is mine and what's yours is yours....unless yours is a lot more than mine, in which case I expect you to share it."

As someone else said, over the years it could well be that this girl never wins another penny on her bonds whilst the others overtake her £5k in dribs and drabs. So how would it have been fair that she was expected to share because her good luck came in one lump sum?

For the record...if I ever won a lot of money (which I won't because I don't do bonds nor the lottery), then I certainly wouldn't share it equally amongst my family because I view some of them as total a-rsehats and I don't like them. Instead those I liked would get a sum and I wouldn't give a stuff about how unfair that was.