Not told of Son's wedding

candygirl

maggy50 wrote: »

Thank you for your kind thoughts.
Yes I must accept his decision, from the photos I have seen he looks very happy but what hurt was his low key wedding involved 30 of her family it seems that he has shunned his family.

So I have sent my best wishes and today I will find a nice card and hope it is seen as it us meant.

thank you xx

Awww i'm so sorry about this difficult situation, and would be gutted if my DD did the same to me:(:(It's good of you to send a card:A

Sambucus_Nigra

maggy50 wrote: »

Thank you for your kind thoughts.
Yes I must accept his decision, from the photos I have seen he looks very happy but what hurt was his low key wedding involved 30 of her family it seems that he has shunned his family.

So I have sent my best wishes and today I will find a nice card and hope it is seen as it us meant.

thank you xx

Have you asked him why you were not invited?

determined_new_ms

Hi op - gosh I'm stunned you must be absolutely gutted. I would be devastated if either of mine got married without me there, and we've had our troubles. On the other hand I have an awful relationship with my mother and would definitely not invite her if I got married as I have no doubt she would spoil the day. I think there must be more to your relationship, when did you stop being close to your son? Why can't you ask him why and let him know you feel hurt by this?

I'm so sorry this must be so painful for you x

DUTR

Charlie23 wrote: »

sorry but why is the son at fault? if HE got married then HE chose the guests and she wasn't invited.
it's his wedding, his choice.
my mil wasn't at the wedding and my fil (they're divorced) was only invited at the last minute because a friend couldn't come.
bride and groom are the people who matter.

If I ever get married I doubt I will invite my family (and we are on speaking terms) I would just go and do it, perhaps invite them to the reception though

splishsplash

OP, you are a better person than I am, I have to say. I would be very hurt and extremely angry too. I'd be so upset and mad that there is no way I could just wish him well and send a card. Not yet, and not without a real conversation about how this situation could possibly have come about.
It's a bit beyond my comprehension, to be honest. Is it that he is just incredibly self-absorbed and spoiled? Is he not mortified to have acted so selfishly and slapped his family in the face so publicly? I actually cannot get my head around this... I keep trying to imagine how it could happen. There was obviously a lot of preparation done, invitations written and sent, venue and meals selected, rehearsals, etc - and while all that was going on, he said not one thing to you or anyone else in the family??


Wow.
Just, wow.

boat_girl

From the other point of view, me and my hubbie got married on the quiet almost 10 years ago and it was the best thing we ever did. I am quite a shy person and would have hated all the fuss, also do not have a great relationship with my family and was dreading a scene caused by certain family members.
My husband, is very close to his parents being an only child and although they were a bit disappointed to not see him married they have always said it was the best thing for us and suited our personalities to just slip off and do our own thing.
Also we were young and money was limited and we would never have wanted to ask our family for financial help as we have both been financially independent since 18. So we cut our cloth to fit our means and by excluding everyone then no one was singled out if you know what I mean!

In your situation then I can see why you would have been hurt as one side of the family has been favoured over the other.

FatVonD

Mojisola wrote: »

Has he told his new wife that his family background is very different to reality and can't introduce to any of you without the truth coming out?

This would make sense of why the OP has never been introduced to her.

cocopops21

So sorry Maggy, that's terrible of your son to do. I would ask why he didn't invite you and invited so many members of her family. I'd be gutted. What a terribly mean thing to do.

globetraveller

sorry, but if he is the type of son who can't even phone to say he is married, and leaves you to find out through FB then something is very wrong. He must have a completely different impression of your relationship with him than you do. Either that, or he is an incredibly selfish person.

jellyhead

Becles wrote: »

My eldest is 15 and is married to his girlfriend on FB, and I know fine well they are not married in real life!

Facebook marriage is okay - it's when your 15 year old gets facebook engaged and he has a ring that you start to worry.

The thought of them getting married in 2 and a bit years ...

But it's one thing to get married with a couple of witnesses and nobody else - but to invite her family and not his, that is hurtful and I can see why OP is upset