One of my workers is pregnant for my best friends fella.

POPPYOSCAR

marisco wrote: »

I would handle things very carefully with how your friend finds out this truly devestating news. This level of shock could be enough to bring on early labour, it is a small risk, but it could happen.

It is awful how the man she is married to has behaved and that he is now threatening you. If I were in your position I would be telling my best friend before your employee. You would handle this with your best friends interests at heart. Your employee may just turn up at the house and want to tear your friends husband apart with no concern for your friends feelings at all.

You know them all well and are best placed to judge what to do next.

This is one of my concerns as well.

If she were not so close to giving birth I would tell her but it is this fact that makes me unsure.

yvonne13_2

marisco wrote: »

I would handle things very carefully with how your friend finds out this truly devestating news. This level of shock could be enough to bring on early labour, it is a small risk, but it could happen.

It is awful how the man she is married to has behaved and that he is now threatening you. If I were in your position I would be telling my best friend before your employee. You would handle this with your best friends interests at heart. Your employee may just turn up at the house and want to tear your friends husband apart with no concern for your friends feelings at all.

You know them all well and are best placed to judge what to do next.

I don't want to stess either woman and I know what they are both like and they would both want proof.
My fingers are crossed that she has seen my Skype and calls me back, I will ask her if I can meet her for lunch tomorrow and I can break it to her gently.

pondskater_2

Does your friend have any close family such as her mother or a sister who may be able to help break this terrible news to her.

POPPYOSCAR

yvonne13 wrote: »

I don't want to stess either woman and I know what they are both like and they would both want proof.
My fingers are crossed that she has seen my Skype and calls me back, I will ask her if I can meet her for lunch tomorrow and I can break it to her gently.

Yes face to face is the only way to do this, not the sort of thing to be discussed by email or phone!

POPPYOSCAR

pondskater wrote: »

Does your friend have any close family such as her mother or a sister who may be able to help break this terrible news to her.

I would not want to hear second hand from family tbh.

yvonne13_2

pondskater wrote: »

Does your friend have any close family such as her mother or a sister who may be able to help break this terrible news to her.

To be honest I think it's best coming from me, I don't want her to think I have been telling everyone before her and it really isn't my place to tell her family.

barbiedoll

As pondskater suggested, do you know your best friend's mum well? Could you get her to ring her daughter, and maybe ask her to get out for the evening, you could then meet up and tell her? At least she would have her mum for support too.

I wouldn't worry too much about "early" labour, if she only has two weeks before she gives birth, she could go into labour anytime now anyway. She needs to know as soon as possible, she will have some difficult choices to make and she needs as much time as possible before the baby is here.

I really don't envy you one bit.

rising_from_the_ashes

Ohhhhh what a truly awful situation - what an absolute rat this guy is.

I often make decisions by trying to put myself on the other side - if you were the BF in the dark, would you want to know? I know I would, no matter how devastating it will be.

It will all come out "in the wash" at some point and, if you haven't told her, think how much worse this will make an impossible situation for her and I know I'd never forgive my BF in a situation like that.

As for your employee, once you've told your BF, I'd also tell her ...... I honestly don't know how you managed to keep "stum" when you ran into them and she introduced him as her fiancee - probably shock.

Best of luck

yvonne13_2

barbiedoll wrote: »

As pondskater suggested, do you know your best friend's mum well? Could you get her to ring her daughter, and maybe ask her to get out for the evening, you could then meet up and tell her? At least she would have her mum for support too.

I wouldn't worry too much about "early" labour, if she only has two weeks before she gives birth, she could go into labour anytime now anyway. She needs to know as soon as possible, she will have some difficult choices to make and she needs as much time as possible before the baby is here.

I really don't envy you one bit.

That's a point I will ring her mum and see if she has heard from her today.

barbiedoll

Yes, and maybe ask her to give her daughter a message to call you urgently?

Good luck with whatever you decide.