One of my workers is pregnant for my best friends fella.

whitewing

If you don't tell her, how are you going to handle it when they ask you to be a godparent....

What a nasty piece of work he is.

POPPYOSCAR

I would be really interested to know if anyone has actually had to tell their best friend that they knew the OH was having an affair, and what the outcome was.

GracieP

yvonne13 wrote: »

I know that when I tell the woman at work she will be asking for time off and my best friend will get mad at me as her head is all over the place at the moment.

Well if you went through with the awful photo plan, your employee would know you had done it on purpose as she just introduced you to her 'fiance.' And would very possibly be consulting the most vicious solicitor she could find to sue you for anything she could as it would be the just about the nastiest cruelest thing anyone could do and as her employer it would be construed as a weird and bullying mind game. Especially considering the fact that she is in a reasonably early state of pregnancy and finding out such a horrible thing in such an unbelievably awful way from her employer could cause damage to the pregnancy.

As for needing proof, well you have proof. Your employee is having his baby and believes she is engaged to him. This isn't a French farce, you don't need to devise an elaborate scheme to out him. As tough as it will be you need to get to your friend, tell her the truth and then do the same for your employee. In both cases act as tactfully as possible and try to arrange for the two women to meet each other if they are willing. They will each be able to prove the relationship to the other.

It won't be easy, it may blow up in your face and tbh, each minute that went by between that man knowing he was caught and you acting, made it all the more likely that it would have a worse outcome for you. As soon as he got over the shock he was clearly planning a way to discredit you. Even if you never tell her, he will not be comfortable with your relationship continuing and will do all he can to keep you apart. But if you handle it as well as you can, as quickly as you can you have the best hope of things between you and your friend, and you and your employee, eventually going back to a good place.

snozberry wrote: »

Your title really doesn't make sense. I thought that your colleague was having a child for them and not preggers because of him.

'Pregnant for him' is a reasonably common regional colloquialism which basically means 'pregnant by him.'

yvonne13_2

poet123 wrote: »

He has been taking a hell of a chance wandering round Manchester (I assume that is where you saw him) he could have bumped into anyone at any time.

We were in the trafford Center and I doubt he was thinking he would get caught.

POPPYOSCAR

yvonne13 wrote: »

@shell_girl I will caller her in the office at the end of the working when everyone has gone home and tell her then.

I really wanted to tell my friend tonight so she knows first but I am scared to go to her house on my own as I don't know what her husband is capable of.

I have just send my friend a skype and hopefully he hasn't seen it.

He may even of taken her out tonight so you can not get to her.

Presumably you could go to her tomorrow when he is at work?

laurel7172

He has probably already told her that you flung yourself at him and threatened to invent an affair as revenge. Sorry. All you can do is the right thing.

poet123

yvonne13 wrote: »

We were in the trafford Center and I doubt he was thinking he would get caught.

Strange, because I suspect most men who are playing away would shy away from going somewhere so public and such a usual haunt of many Mancunians.

looby75

I know he is threatening to make up lies about you if you tell your best friend, but whats he said about you telling your co worker. Surely he doesn't think he has any hold over you there?

POPPYOSCAR

poet123 wrote: »

Strange, because I suspect most men who are playing away would shy away from going somewhere so public and such a usual haunt of many Mancunians.

You would be surprised!

Some people are so arrogant they think they can do anything and get away with it - lets face it to actually get engaged to someone else takes some front!!

marisco_2

I would handle things very carefully with how your friend finds out this truly devestating news. This level of shock could be enough to bring on early labour, it is a small risk, but it could happen.

It is awful how the man she is married to has behaved and that he is now threatening you. If I were in your position I would be telling my best friend before your employee. You would handle this with your best friends interests at heart. Your employee may just turn up at the house and want to tear your friends husband apart with no concern for your friends feelings at all.

You know them all well and are best placed to judge what to do next.