Bottle feeding and guilt

Mojisola

janninew wrote: »

I think threads like these do nobody any favours! Bottle feeding mothers end up stressed and upset as its such a sensitive subject.

Just feed your baby how you want and forget EVERYBODY else and what they think!!

Why would this thread upset someone? I think the majority view is supportive of mothers choosing whichever method suits them.

poet123

Mojisola wrote: »

Why would this thread upset someone? I think the majority view is supportive of mothers choosing whichever method suits them.

Hopefully!!

If I remember correctly though the last thread on this subject had someone expound the view that trying breast feeding should be mandatory and that formula should be prescription only.;)

Mojisola

mildred1978 wrote: »

I doubt it's any more stressful than hundreds/thousands of years ago. And yet we've survived, generation after generation.

More "primitive" societies are usually very protective of new mothers - I'm sure our ancestors noticed that happy mothers and babies lead to better survival rates.

Having an effective flight/fight reaction is good; being permanently in that state is bad for the body and mind.

That's why I don't think that mothers who are struggling to BF should be pressurised to continue when they don't want to. I think the benefits of BF are wiped out by the lifetime results of having a stressed-out, underfed and unhappy baby.

Mothers should have the option and be supported in their choice.

janninew

Mojisola wrote: »

Why would this thread upset someone? I think the majority view is supportive of mothers choosing whichever method suits them.

Threads like this invariably end up with posters having a heated debate and the benefits of breast milk versus formula being discussed. The OP said herself she was going to stop reading, I can imagine she is feeling quite sensitive and some comments may upset her.

To be quite honest though as a breastfeeding Mum I've had a few negative comments about breastfeeding. I had a young Mum from our baby massage group ask me how long I was going to breastfeed and whether I was going to be one of these 'weird hippy mums' who breastfed a toddler! Even a friend who is a school nurse said 'didn't I think it was time to stop now!'

My Daughter was born at 27 weeks and spent 13 weeks in the SCBU and I expressed every 3 hours for her for 3 months so I know exactly how hard it can be. Babies born as early as my Daughter can't tolerate formula, so its was either my own milk or they use milk from a donor mum. I dread thinking about stopping breastfeeding as my Daughter sees a Consultant every few weeks due to her having numerous problems and I dread telling him that I am no longer breastfeeding. I know I'm probably being ridiculous and its my decision to stop, but I know when I do I'm going to feel very guilty.

Mojisola

janninew wrote: »

To be quite honest though as a breastfeeding Mum I've had a few negative comments about breastfeeding.

I know I'm probably being ridiculous and its my decision to stop, but I know when I do I'm going to feel very guilty.

These things go in cycles. I had comments about BF my children because most people used formula. We were all given a kit in the maternity hospital with "everything to get you started"! I had to be very discrete when I had to feed when we were out and about. Mothers were expected to go and sit in the toilets to feed their babies if they weren't using bottles.

The crux of the matter is that we should all be supported in our decision and no-one should be made to feel guilty or weird.

janninew

Mojisola wrote: »

These things go in cycles. I had comments about BF my children because most people used formula. We were all given a kit in the maternity hospital with "everything to get you started"! I had to be very discrete when I had to feed when we were out and about. Mothers were expected to go and sit in the toilets to feed their babies if they weren't using bottles.

The crux of the matter is that we should all be supported in our decision and no-one should be made to feel guilty or weird.

I wish we could all be supported in our own choices, but I doubt it will ever happen. I think the trick is to forget the negative comments and don't let them bother you (easier said then done!)

I never had pressure from medical staff about breastfeeding, I saw them giving the same support and help to Mums who fed formula milk as they did to breastfeeding Mums. I've only had negative comments from other Mums! They will always be women who think breastfeeding is the absolute best and your are a failure if you can't do it or don't want to try and equally from women who think breastfeeding is 'a bit weird' and can't understand the idea of putting a nipple in your babies mouth!