Allowance for clothes

Brighton_belle

Well OP, I think it sounds a good idea. She clearly is a lovely girl with a mature well balanced outlook and the 'discussing things' relationship you have with er as parents sets a good precedent for her teenage years. You know her best and are quite clear she is very much a girl and not a wanna be teenager, nor obsessed with appearance core values etc.

Her interest in clothing (as opposed to high fashion) is a gift and I wish I had had that sense of individuality at her age. Why try and stifle that?

This will teach her about budgeting and how much things cost and how we have to make choices, we can't have everything we want. Also, how to save and not spend every month if she needs a new coat for winter sort of thing. I don't think you can stifle what is already there. The only thing that is changing it from how it already is, seems to me, is introducing her to the concept of budgeting.

For further interesting discussions with her over time around clothing, how about looking up project 333 - (google it): aimed at adults mainly though really, anyone who is in charge of their own wardrobe, it's about builidng a core wardrobe (i.e owning 33 items of clothing including shoes an acessories, with alterations 'allowed' each season) and not owning so many clothes you never wear most of what you own.

And am I the only teenager who was lovely, didn't rant ,rave or generally make my parents life a misery? Does it have to be a forgone conclusion she'll turn into a nightmare?

abis21

I too don't understand the negative responses you recieved at first on this thread, and don't think you will create a 'monster' if you allow your daughter to enjoy her hobby of fashion / clothes. I do think you may create a 'monster' tho if you try to discourage her and stifle what she likes. I rebelled against my mum in my teenage years as she tried to control me over things like this and I hated it.

My daughter is 6, and she likes clothes too. Sometimes she gets to pick her outfits, with guidence on what the weather will be like (ie, she can't wear a sundress when its cold outside etc) and what we are doing (so if we are going to a playcentre then she needs to wear leggins or trousers - not a skirt or dress). She loves it and is very bohemian and likes to very much mix her patterns and colours! Asshe gets older I presume there will also be some rules on what is appropriate too clothing wise.

She also likes to design clothes after playing with another little girl on holiday once who had a 'designing book'. We bought her some of these: http://www.amazon.co.uk/Fashion-Angels-Design-Colouring-Portfolio/dp/B002CSRZKQ/ref=sr_1_2?ie=UTF8&qid=1339321307&sr=8-2 They have a few different versions. DD loves to mix and match styles with these designs too!!

As for the allowance - I'm not really sure how it would work to be honest? You don't really get much for £10 these days - not even in primark or the like. My DD would choose a dress every single month with an allowance like that, and she doesn't really need all that many dresses. We tend to go shopping every 4 months or so out of town as there isn't really any suitable shops where we live. And she grows too much as well, so sometimes she does need new clothes (shes in age 8-9 clothes normally now as shes so tall!)

I agree with teaching children about money and budgetting, but I don't know how this would work as presumably you will still need to buy other bits of clothes and shoes to supplement the £10 (not including uniform I mean) so I think it may be confusing for your DD as she may think she gets money for clothes in her allowance, but still gets new stuff anyway. So she may get a mixed message about potential budgetting/money guidence.

kj*daisy

I think some posters have been a bit harsh, but rather than an allowance I would suggest she goes shopping with mum every couple of months and has the 20 to spend then, rather than 10 a month, and you still retain the final say so over whether something is suitable.

SandC

I also think that it's entirely possible for an 8/9 year old to be able to choose an outfit that is suitable for the weather/occasion. In fact surely that's part of what shows that the interest is a genuine one?

Many kids of that age of course want to wear their favourite sundress even though it's gone autumnal and have to be guided towards something more appropriate (or just plain old 'told') but not all.

SandC

Abis21 you have just reminded me of the comics I used to read as a little girl. You would have a girl to cut out and then various outfits to cut out and dress her with. And these were comics for young girls, not teens - so we were encouraged to take an interest back in the 70s!

FatVonD

I recall wanting certain fashion items from the age of about 10 (Levi cords and a fringed suede waistcoat in my case!) and I also remember cringing with embarrassment at some of the clothes my mum dressed me in before that (crimplene suits :eek: ) and I remember buying some of the things I really wanted (party dresses) at a jumble sale only for my mum to throw them away.

I do think your DD should be allowed to have some input into what she prefers to wear but my issue with the allowance idea is that you will be encouraging her to buy clothes whether she needs them or not, at 8 they should be a necessity and nothing more.

KxMx

I don't think it's the fact that the little girl will be allowed an input, rather the fact that it seems like she would be given control, and would be going out and buying stuff monthly for the sake of it rather than need ie outgrown, a special party etc.

I certainly had an input at 8 as to what I wore, in fact Mum tells me at 4 I would match colours etc, but it was only when I needed something. At that time I was in school in the US so no uniform, and clothes were on a strictly need basis outside of Christmas and Birthdays.

mintymoneysaver

I think it's quite a good idea. It's only £10 a month, and you're not going to get much for that anyway. And if it's not spent one month, then it could be £20 the month after. I probably spent far more than this a month on my children's clothes even if I was just buying shorts and t shirts from Asda!

Blue_Elephant

I haven't read through all of this thread, but it sounds to me like what you want to do it give her a "virtual" allowance rather than just hand her the tenner every month. And that you may not be necessarily "going shopping" every month, but rather if it has been 3 months, there is £30 for her to pick things from.

It's not like you're going to send her shopping by herself at 8yo, nor is she going to have the money in her hand to wander to the cashpoint, so control is ultimately yours or your partners.

I'm sure at 8 she wouldn't be confused between need vs want, so she'll understand that parents will buy "needs", she gets to choose "wants".

Go for it. I'd be concerned if she was after designer stuff and clothes designed for older people, but that doesn't seem to be the case, rather that instead of mummy choosing the pink t-shirt, she gets to choose the blue one, but if the blue one is a little more expensive she might not be able to have something else.

It's not an extra amount of money, it's just that she gets some extra "rights" within reason, and with that she learns responsibility.

Go for it.

PS I'm not a parent, and mum made most of my clothes that when I was little, and we still had battles. I just couldn't understand why my long swishy dress mum had made was not appropriate for playing in the park in the rain. 8 years later mum despaired because I wouldn't wear anything resembling a dress or a skirt

bigmomma051204

Hiya - i for one would try and encourage her interest (as you would if she was interested in egyptians or flowers etc etc lol)

BUT i dont think i would give her an "allowance" as such... think i would encourage the interest rather than the product - get her some design books or those design things someone else suggested... maybe see if she would like to have a shared hobby with mum and try "making" her own clothes - start perhaps by getting some fabric pens and sequins etc and letting her design her own tshirts etc? If she still shows an interest, maybe get her a sewing kit or perhaps sewing machine - she can then use methods like applique etc to put her own style on her clothes - take her shopping in charity shops as she does already but having designed an outfit and then she can chop up and redesign things as she pleases. Thus giving her interest a learnable skill rather than just learning to spend money