Allowance for clothes

Lotus-eater

My 8 and 3/4 DD has been into fashion and her clothes for as long as I remember.
Not luckily which clothes/labels are in fashion now, but just the way she looks, she really cares how she looks and which clothes she wears.
She gets lots of 2nd hand clothes from friends of ours and has no problem with that (she actually loves it), but loves shopping with my DW for clothes.

My DW is thinking of giving her a clothing allowance of £10 a month, not in her hand, but virtually in a book, so she can then choose what to buy and when.
Her shoes and school clothes would not come into this money.

It seems a good idea, it will make her grown up and get her more used to what things cost.

But I'm a little hesitant, I myself spend next to nothing on clothes, only replacing them when they are falling off me. Now I'm not saying she should be the same, we are who we are, but it she a little young to be given this freedom?

Northern_Princess

Sorry, I think this is far too young to have an allowance for fashion. Then again I may be an old fuddy duddy at the grand old age of 44 At 8 or 9 children should be children is my view not young teenagers. There's plenty time for her to enjoy fashion when she's older Hold back the years and encourage her to be a child. Their childhood years are so short, I feel it's such a shame to waste them. I really don't like seeing little girls dressed as teenagers.

Lotus-eater

She's not dressed as a teenager, she just likes to pick what she wears and buys. She is still very much a child.
Luckily her school is really great and there is no pressure for anything fashion wise between any of the kids, it's not that, but it's one of the things she really cares about.
Thanks for you view.

Dunroamin

I agree totally with the above.

I'd try to nip it in the bud or at least try to distract her; the last thing to do is to encourage her.

Nan63

Will your DD be expected to earn this extra money? Will she be asked to do a few more chores (if indeed, she does any to begin with of course). Not sure just giving her an extra allowance is the way to go to be honest.

As she is Ok with being given 2nd hand clothes I think that should be encouraged more, she may become more individual and stylish in her dress sense and not become a slave to fashion as she has to make the donated clothes 'fit' together more if that makes sense?!

Also, perhaps the answer to your question about freedom can be found in your own signature ....

poet123

I am afraid I agree too. At the age of eight if she is thinking about fashion she may well be a nightmare by the age of 14. Children need to be guided and moulded not given free reign, it is dangerous precedent imo. I would not pander to it.

coinxoperated

I think she's too young to handle the responsibility of money. Rather than put the responsibility on her, why don't you take her out for a mum and daughter outing once every couple of months and give her 30.00 to spend and do a bit of charity shop searching. She might get some fabulous stuff, you get mum and daughter time, and maybe even discuss about her giving away/selling stuff she doesn't want anymore, to get stuff she does want and teaching her the way of giving and receiving rather than focussing on cash?

MatyMoo

My sister did this with her 3 girls once they were at secondary school but 8 seems way to young to me.

If she already gets pocket money doesn't she get a choice in what she spends that on anyway?

Lotus-eater

Nan63 wrote: »

Will your DD be expected to earn this extra money? Will she be asked to do a few more chores (if indeed, she does any to begin with of course). Not sure just giving her an extra allowance is the way to go to be honest.

As she is Ok with being given 2nd hand clothes I think that should be encouraged more, she may become more individual and stylish in her dress sense and not become a slave to fashion as she has to make the donated clothes 'fit' together more if that makes sense?!

Also, perhaps the answer to your question about freedom can be found in your own signature ....

She is very individual and stylish already, she's not a slave to fashion at all, I thought I made that clear.
It's not an extra allowance, it's her clothes allowance, what we probably would have spend on her anyway.

poet123 wrote: »

I am afraid I agree too. At the age of eight if she is thinking about fashion she may well be a nightmare by the age of 14. Children need to be guided and moulded not given free reign, it is dangerous precedent imo. I would not pander to it.

As I said above, it's not fashion, as such, just "her fashion" the way she likes to be. Of course she will still be guided, we're not going to let her buy anything.

coinxoperated wrote: »

I think she's too young to handle the responsibility of money. Rather than put the responsibility on her, why don't you take her out for a mum and daughter outing once every couple of months and give her 30.00 to spend and do a bit of charity shop searching. She might get some fabulous stuff, you get mum and daughter time, and maybe even discuss about her giving away/selling stuff she doesn't want anymore, to get stuff she does want and teaching her the way of giving and receiving rather than focussing on cash?

She does charity clothes shopping all ready, we shop at them all the time, she doesn't care if it comes from a charity shop or a normal shop.
Selling her unwanted stuff would be a good idea and she would be happy to turn round the extra money that bought in, but we normally donate it, or give it away to someone else anyway.

Northern_Princess

Lotus-eater wrote: »

She's not dressed as a teenager, she just likes to pick what she wears and buys. She is still very much a child.
Luckily her school is really great and there is no pressure for anything fashion wise between any of the kids, it's not that, but it's one of the things she really cares about.
Thanks for you view.

At 8 years of age there is no way I would have allowed my daughter to choose what she wore or bought. However, that's just me and my view.

It worries me children try and grow up far too fast. It may be choosing her own clothes at age 8 but you have to ask yourself where will it end? Will she be wearing make up at age 10 given 'freedom' to choose what she spends that allowance on?

I'm not having a 'dig' at you, so please don't think that, but please look at the possible outcome for the future.

Lotus-eater

Northern_Princess wrote: »

At 8 years of age there is no way I would have allowed my daughter to choose what she wore or bought. However, that's just me and my view.

It worries me children try and grow up far too fast. It may be choosing her own clothes at age 8 but you have to ask yourself where will it end? Will she be wearing make up at age 10 given 'freedom' to choose what she spends that allowance on?

I'm not having a 'dig' at you, so please don't think that, but please look at the possible outcome for the future.

That's very interesting, she chooses what she wears already, sort of, we both have the final decision of course, but one of her passions is choosing her clothes.
I know it's difficult to see when it's written on a forum, but she is really a lovely little girl, very unstreetlike and nothing at all like that. She has a passion for clothes, always has, she's nothing like a brat, or anything you see on the tv.