Allowance for clothes

Dunroamin

FBaby wrote: »

at first I read you were considering £10 a week allowance and I thought that Saad easy over the board but £10 a month I don't see anything wrong with that. What I don't understand is why you can't just give her pocket money and then she can do what she wants with it rather than a clothes allowance. I would definitely encourage the artistic side of it though rather then the cosmetic one.

I think that this is a good point.

One of the things that worries me about your plan is the idea that anyone needs a certain amount of money per month to be spent on clothes as opposed to buying stuff when it's outgrown or worn out.

It makes me think of adults on other MSE boards who allocate an amount of money for clothes even when on a tight budget, as if, come what may, one always have to keep buying clothes whether they're needed or not.

POPPYOSCAR

Northern_Princess wrote: »

I completely agree with this :T I am the mother of a hormonal teenager :rotfl:

Yes I have one of those as well.

Fed up with hearing about her friends who have a monthly clothing allowance, some as much as £200!!

VJsmum

Northern_Princess wrote: »

I completely agree with this :T I am the mother of a hormonal teenager :rotfl:

Yep - me too.:p

My DD has always been - erm - opinionated and has never followed a trend. I do think kids have to have an input into their clothes to some extent because, mine certainly, would refuse to wear what i bought them if they didn't like it. When my DD became 11, so high school age, we gave her pocket money of so much per month (more than £10). We buy her uniforms, shoes (that we think she needs), and some essentials - a basic wardrobe if you like. She has to use her allowance to pay for trips to the cinema with friends, friends birthdays (cos that was getting out of hand financially) and her other clothes that she "wanted" rather than "needed". I have to say not much of the money has gone on clothes.

If she is creative, would she be able to try making some clothes - a simple skirt or shorts? with help of course.

I think with some ground rules - i.e. you have the final say over the suitability of something - it might be workable.

SandC

I don't think there's anything wrong with it either. It's difficult to not read it as a young obsessed with fashion (like you do see some kids dressed up to the nines) but I read it as a young girl who is into clothes.

I was like that myself from a younger age than she is. I had a next door neighbour 5 years older who used to give me hand me downs. Whilst friends' mums were putting their outfits out for them, I would put my own together. I didn't do much shopping and I wasn't allowed to just have anything I wanted or when I wanted something. But the interest was always there.

I think the idea will give her a head start in budgeting and learning that you can't have everything you want.

I was into music from a young age too (that neighbour again) but I only had pocket money so record buying didn't really happen - the radio though was always by my side from the age of around 7 and that's never stopped. The biggest thrill was when I got a radio cassette recorder finally when I was older and I could tape the charts etc. Yet many friends only ever bothered with music if there was some novelty tune in the charts that would get played at birthday parties. I was holed away from 5-7pm every Sunday with my radio.

Personally I think this is a healthy interest and no different to any other hobby or pastime.

January20

I have just come into this thread - late as usual! - and caught up with most ofit.

I am surprised at the number of people who thinks this little girl's interest in clothes should be stiffled! I think her individuality should be nurtured and guided and to be perfectly frank, if more parents did this and talked to their kids like the OP and his wife seem to, then perhaps we wouldn't see so many teenage girls dressing like t.a.r.t.s, believing flashing the flesh = looking good. I remember taking some y11-13 on an trip to France and, in a school we were visiting, the way the French kids were looking at our girls! The shame!

OP, you said you wouldn't actually give her the money but keep it in a book or something. I think that's a good idea to give her a sense of how much her passion costs her. It would be a good idea to record purchases from charity shops, high street shops and also clothes given to her.

Yes, 8 and 3/4 is young, but they are so grown up already at that age and it sounds to me like this girl has a passion. She could become a fashion designer.

My own dd has always been into clothes whilst I am not much. It has been delightful for me to watch her over the years, trying styles out, going through phases and developing her taste. She has not turned into a monster - even if I say so myself lol!

JC9297

I can't believe some people are so against letting an 8 year old say which clothes they like, thinking it's going to turn her into a superficial, appearance obsessed adult. Nobody is suggesting she wants to wear age inappropriate clothing, just that she likes certain colours, styles etc, it doesn't mean she is growing up too soon or missing out on being a child somehow.What about boys who want to wear their favourite football team's shirt, should we just buy them whatever is cheapest and tell them it doesn't matter which one they wear?
Personally I wouldn't bother with the £10 a month allowance, mind you I think I spent a lot more than £120 a year on my boys' clothes at that age (they are now 15 and 19). If you do want her to be financially aware maybe when she is taken shopping let her know there is a budget for that day.

aliasojo

Dunroamin wrote: »

One of the things that worries me about your plan is the idea that anyone needs a certain amount of money per month to be spent on clothes as opposed to buying stuff when it's outgrown or worn out.

It makes me think of adults on other MSE boards who allocate an amount of money for clothes even when on a tight budget, as if, come what may, one always have to keep buying clothes whether they're needed or not.

This bit bothers me a little too.

It's almost as if she's at a crossroads in life and one road leads to 'buy what you need' and the other leads to 'buy what you like' (don't take that literally, I realise you will have final say, I just mean 'like' as in wanted and not actually needed).

Now obviously life is a balance somewhere between the two, but I just have this wee niggle that starting her off down the 'buy what you like' road, at 8 (nearly 9 ) years old, is perhaps not wise.

BUT.....obviously character and individuality will play a part in whether she becomes 'expectant' or can stay well balanced as she matures. (So will hormones at 13. )

It's a tough call. I'm glad I'm skint and couldn't afford this option anyway. Natural avoidance at it's best.

SandC

Dare I say it but most of the more monstrous little princesses that I know of were somewhat guided that way by parents dressing them up from a young age.

Alikay

I'm all for children having an input into what they wear: Mine had favourite colours from a very early age, and some are also very sensitive to texture of fabrics, but an allowance is too "teenage" IMO.

At 8 or 9 I think parents should be the ones to judge whether trousers, socks or a dress are needed, and the child's input into the specifics of a given item is all that's needed. An allowance gives more choice about what and when things are bought.

Spendless

I understand where you are coming from as I have a 9 year old daughter who also likes to 'choose' or rather have some in-put into what she wears, whereas the rest of the household me, Mr S and our 12yo son think of clothes as you describe yourself.

What happens at the minute regards clothes buying? I tend to go a few times per year for summer clothes and winter clothes and take my DD with me, having sorted thru the wardrobe first with what has been out-grown or has 'had-it' and what will do for the next season. I would maintain overall control though,which I think is something you are saying you would too, not because I think my DD would buy a leopoard skin mini skirt but because she doesn't always think of practicalities. Mine likes long dresses, but she still needs t-shirts and leggings for playing in the park for example.