Real life MMD: Should I pay for Grandma's 'gifts'?

AsknAnswer2

Haha, my mum did exactly this when I was pregnant with my first. Bought baby clothes then told me how much they were and held her hand out for me to pay her for them! I handed the bag of clothes back to her telling her that I hadn't asked for this, we hadn't discussed it or made any agreement so she was welcome to return them or sell them to make her money back, I wasn't paying for clothes I hadn't asked for or picked. I was furious with the nerve of her.

st_owly

Give them straight back. Tell her you can't afford them and that you'd rather choose things you need, especially since you have most of them already. You could possibly compromise if necessary by offering to pay for a few things you do actually need.

tindella

Goodness - not the ideal Granny, eh! I would tell her that you can't afford them. Surely she should know how you're fixed - or haven't you told her? If you haven't, you should before she goes out and buys a top range buggy! No need to cause a row - just tell her, you're sorry but she'll have to take them back and get a refund. She might offer to split the cost with you - but if she doesn't, they have to go back. Then she won't do it again - hopefully!!

cuba2008

My daughter's pregnant at the moment - baby due in August. It's their first child and, just like the OP, she and her husband are short of money. I wouldn't dream of going behind her back, buying a whole load of stuff chosen by me for the baby, then expect her to pay for it! If I were the OP I wouldn't even offer to split the cost because, even if she agrees, you are still going to be in the position of paying for items you don't necessarily even like and she may think it's okay to do the same thing again. It's one thing to be given gifts you may not be too keen on, it's another thing altogether to be expected to pay for the privilege.

GerryC

Although it is a cheek for her to do this, she is family and some peace needs to be maintained. So, without being rude or seeming to be ungrateful, I would ensure that she knows that you are working to a budget and have to stick to this so her purchases are unplanned for and therefore have to be returned so that you stick to / within your budget. This will hopefully make you both 'win' out of this.

Dirtybird

The answer is simple......NO,
If she went out and bought them without you asking her to then its not up to you to pay for them.
I would have thought though that most Grandmas would love to buy things as gifts for their grandchild and not expect any kid of payment, especially if she knows your financial situation.

Psyon

Come on.. All the above people are right, but come on!! It's your mum.. Don't make a fuss of it..

Just say,,, "Mum! I didn't ask for these. Pls return it"

It's your mum!!

eilidhcatriona

No! That's just plain rude.

You could look at it from one side, and think it's kind of her to help you out with shopping for the baby. But what she should have done, if that was her intention, was ask what you needed and what your budget was.

Don't pay. Explain you can't afford it and anything you're paying for, you want to choose yourself.

linedancer123

I would turn it into a joke and make it light, saying thanks Mum, take the money out of ..... Babys pocket money, you know I can't afford it.

domoneill

I agree that this is cheeky, but being within the family it would be wise to remain placid about it.

When returning them, say that they are unsuitable but stress that you think she should return them to the shop. That way it would seem less of a waste of money on her part.