Return to Solvency

missrlr

Hi Granny

Glad you are enjoying the money a little. I know when we manged to pay off a large chunk of most of the debts DH was very bitter about the fact he had "had" all this money and instead of being able to live the high life with it and "enjoy" the money (e.g. spend on stuff because he can) there was "nothing" to show for it. Not help in so far as the redundnacy issue at the time and the subsequent lack of incoming funds meant a lack of leap upwards in living standards / spending power whatever. If I am honest he is still bitter about it now.
Quite frustrating but I suppose he had always thought of getting rid of the debt with the job he had (and therefore the income), thus when both went it was net no gain.
Hopefully your DH can resolve this issue in his head, eventually. If you can aget another job for income then you can both see the rewards more quickly. We are still treading water here so 18 months on and no traction forwards, equally as I keep reminding him not slipping backwards either.

Hope you get the response you want - did you put a time limit on the offers?

grannyx2

Hi Missrlr

I'm doing the letters today but will be putting a time limit on them as I don't want to be making payments to them next month, (other than settlements) if I can help it.

OH doesn't know how much I have and therefore won't moan when it's all gone. We had a chat on Sat and I earmarked what he thinks I have. It seemed to work.

Although I'm nervous about finding new employment I'm prepared to do just about anything really. I have a support counsellor who has said she has no doubt I will find work easily once I start looking. I'm considering temping work to start to give me a bit more flexibility. I know things won't be easy without my income but as long as my offers are accepted we will just have the mortgage & secured loan to pay, no unsecured debts at all and a bit of a buffer fund.

I'm being positive and have everything crossed

Sorry to hear you are still finding things difficult

Granny x

amber03

Granny I did exactly the same as you when I came into a bit of money, I didn't tell my OH how much I actually received, some people may find this awful. I love my OH but he can be a bit overpowering with money. My MIL once told me that when she had a inheritance when her dad died she put a little bit a way "just in case". Which at the time shocked me but now I understand. I didn't want to spend all the money just kept a little back that is there if I ever needed it.


I left my previous job as everybody I knew who wanted another job seemed to get one. Somebody said to me if you don't look you wont find. So I took the plunge took redundancy from work had a little break and breather then within two months I found I job I enjoy. Good luck and don't rush into anything.x

grannyx2

Thanks for the positive post Amber, I'm glad you understand. It's hard hiding it all from OH but like yours he's overpowering and puts the pressure on re money. I need some financial security for once in my adult life.

Granny x

grannyx2

Offer letters written, ready to post recorded delivery tomorrow morning. I've given them 2 weeks to respond, fingers crossed this works

I feel shattered now

Granny x

grannyx2

I've also updated my signature to show the revised figures for now. Now need to do a snowball to see what my DFD will be if things don't go to plan

Feeling quite positive right now though and have spent the afternoon looking for flights to Oz

please-let-me-be-lucky

Love that things are so positive for you now! Enjoy booking those flights Xx

missrlr

I can totally relate to the overwhelming money behaviour what is it with men and money?!?

Fingers firmly crossed for a positive outcome

beanielou

please-let-me-be-lucky wrote: »

Love that things are so positive for you now! Enjoy booking those flights Xx

From me too.
Positive vibes for the offers.

grannyx2

Thanks for the visit Beanie, Lucky & Missrlr

I've had a really good day today, no reason in particular but am feeling really happy & calm. No news yet, far too soon but what will be will be and I'm feeling positive

Granny x