would this offend you or are people just to touchy

belfastgirl23

Regardless of what anyone else thinks, she was offended. It wasn't what you intended but it happened. I think you should apologise and say that the reason you thought she'd find it funny was because she didn't do that and you never dreamed she would take it personally. Might be worth adding in a bunch of flowers as well!

Better_Off_1983

Hi,

I just asked my partner what he thought, he said he would feel offended. I can see the 'joke' in it though. You see loads of those cartoons with captions and I find them funny- I see many about people posting pictures of their children as their profile picture which means the mother/father has lost all their sense of identity now that they has become a parent. In your case, I think it would be more hurtful and offensive if you actually wrote it as a status and tried to make it like a subliminal message - like many people do when they rant about a 'friend' on their status but not actually use their name.

System

I must admit i stopped sharing my funny pics on Facebook for the reason that i had to answer too many questions from family members about what and why i posted what i did.

marywooyeah

Tiddlywinks wrote: »

It says "Dear mother in law...", it's on your FB page - as someone else has said, you only have one MIL.... so, it is safe to assume that this message is from you and is directed at your one and only MIL.

this pretty much sums it up, although personally I think it's hilarious and apt. heck, I'd share it myself if I didn't know for a fact it would cause a storm of s**t to kick off with my touchy MIL!

Four_leaf_clover_2

Tiddlywinks wrote: »

The 'funny picture' and message says that you live with one of your MIL's children and that he needs a lot of improvement.... as in, you think she did a less than good job at raising her child (your OH) - how else can this be interpretted.

The OP has said that the MIL knows full well what her son is like. She also mentioned that it has been joked between them that it must be like having three children in the OPs house.

Despite doing our best parenting we are all fully aware by the time our kids grow up that they will have their faults. If we are honest with ourselves most of us will admit that some of those faults are down to things we could have, but didn't do better. No need to wrap yourself over the knuckles for it for years to come or take such offense to a lighhearted joke.

See this as a sign to remove MIL from your fb account OP.

Buckslad_2

Oh and shame on you for being on that site :mad:

Nicki

mummyoftwomonkeys wrote: »

Tiddlywinks wrote: »

The 'funny picture' and message says that you live with one of your MIL's children and that he needs a lot of improvement.... as in, you think she did a less than good job at raising her child (your OH) - how else can this be interpretted.[/QU

on the flip side the person who "reported back to her" never went to her own sons wedding and doesn't talk to her son or daughter in law so maybe she thought she would try and do the same to us and when she sees me in the street always asks me if her daughter in law is expecting yet

OK. So not only did you put it on your Facebook for your mum in law to read directly, you also have friends who read it who also know your MIL in real life. And you are wondering why she feels offended? I suspect she is not just offended, she is also feeling publicly shamed and unliked. Even if this was not your intention, and you thought the cartoon was funny, if you care about your MIL I think you need to be making amends to her.

coolcait

mummyoftwomonkeys wrote: »

well seeing as Im only married to one man then yes. its just a funny picture. Its not like it even says don't tell me how to bring up my kids, or anything such as that.

Yes, it does...

"I don't need you to teach me how to handle my children"

- that's very close to saying "I don't need you to teach me how to bring up my kids".

As a casual internet reader, I can see the funny side of it.

If I were a mother-in-law who had been joking with my daughter-in-law about how your 'children' never grow up, and how - despite your best efforts as a mother - they still have their 'little ways' , then it might have come across as a shared joke.

If it was posted out-of-the-blue then it must be very hard for her to escape the fear that it is a very public denunciation of her as a mother-in-law (" I don't need you to teach me how to handle my children!!" :mad: ) and as a mother ("I have one of yours living at home and he needs a lot of improvement" :cool:).

It seems like an extraordinarily tactless thing to 'share' on somewhere like Facebook if you have a mother-in-law.

I'd agree with the advice you've already been given.

Take the message off Facebook; apologise in person, with a bunch of flowers in hand; and be prepared to explain why you never dreamt that it might be offensive (maybe because she's such a lovely, supportive MIL, that you simply didn't see the 'joke' as applying to her? - grovel, grovel, grovel).

faerie~spangles

mummyoftwomonkeys wrote: »

thanks i guess i just thought after being married to her son for 6 years I knew her better than that but obviously not.

You know her son as an adult better than she thinks she knows him.

Do yourself favour, stop fretting over it.

FatVonD

Ouch, guaranteed to offend (but very funny.) You might have got away with it on a greetings card given to her so she knows she's in on the joke but not on facebook where it just looks like a dig.