Mothers day and wivies

lewt

does this sort of thing keep you awake at night phil?

studentphil

inkie wrote:

I think that this is one of the considerations for not having relationships and children so quickly after the closure of a previous relationship. That aside, why does she even need to know - why can't he just do what he needs to do, and it would never come to her atention. Not the best situation, but if she is going to get the face on over the whole thing then this may be the best way forward. Second and subsequent wives need to accept the status quo in regard to children from their partners previous relationships, as they will always have a connection with their parent.

Is keeping it a secret good though? Surely it looks like you are hiding stuff from each other.

MJMum

---

studentphil

lewt wrote:

does this sort of thing keep you awake at night phil?

Not especially.

Kimberley

MJMum wrote:

I'm married to a man who has a child from a previous relationship, and we always made cards for mother's day with my step-daughter when she was small for her mum. It's about the child wanting to do something, not about the woman receiving it IMHO.

Although looking at the ages of the respective children in the OP, perhaps there is a bit more friction there than in our situation as I didn't meet my husband until he had already been divorced for 3 years.

I agree, I think the 2nd wife is jealous, well she knew he had another child when she met him so she should except it and if the dad listens to her and gets no card for his son then he should be whipped :rolleyes:

We all have a past when we meet new people especially as we get older.

studentphil

Lets say 2nd wife was friendly with husband when he was married to 1st wife, therefore, they feel threaten by each other slightly.

Kimberley

studentphil wrote:

Lets say 2nd wife was friendly with husband when he was married to 1st wife, therefore, they feel threaten by each other slightly.

The father should be ashamed of himself:rolleyes:

studentphil

sherbetpops wrote:

It really shouldnt matter who met who, where or when they met, this should be about a child getting a card for its mother, maybe dad should leave new mum out too when not purchasing cards

So is best thing for him just to buy wife 1 a card and gift and not to tell wife 2?

helen_caslass

its shocking that this woman should make it all about her... he had the child when they got together the child id much more likely to be well adjusted if his parents have a good relationship. does the ex buy him a fathers day card from his son? if he gets a card fine buy the mother a card if he gets a card and gift buy her the same, just because she doesnt have a new partner does not mean she should miss out on a day that thanks her for bringing new life into the world, all mothers should get something on mothers day be it bought by the child the ex or her herself (esp if single mum who has nothing to do with father)

studentphil

Kimberley wrote:

The father should be ashamed of himself:rolleyes:

I am not sure if it was an affair!!

They were just friendly in that they would go to the pub together and stuff like that.