Strange Request for a wedding?

fashionlover10

My boyfriend has just invited me to his friends wedding which prompted me to mention this thread to him. His immediate reaction was that no way in hell would he shave off his beard for anybody.

Definitely does seem a bridezilla thing. I'd just elope to avoid the need for any 'requests' if it was my wedding!

poet123

It really has got out of hand, how can brides really think it acceptable to make so many "requests" or rather, "demands" of guests? The same guests who will in the main be happily forking out for travel, accom, outfits,and a gift.

My wedding photos are hilarious, my bridesmaids were like chalk and cheese (or actually Hinge and Brackett) one very tall, thin and gaunt and one short and rotund. Looking back and hearing these tales it occurs to me that some people would have made different choices based on the looks of those involved in the wedding party rather than the relationship or personality. How shallow is that?

I can well imagine this is just such a "demand" I just find it rude and tacky.

sarahs999

We had kids at our wedding but we hired childminders and said that any kids who would get bored by the ceremony could go and play with them instead (we got married in a manor house and barn with lots of rooms so it was all nearby). In the end no one used the childminders; now that I have children myself I think it was probably overkill - I'd want my child to be there to see what a wedding was all about. Guess not everyone's would be interested/well behaved though. We also made sure there were goody bags for each of the kids on their table so they had something to do during the meal and speeches. That was definitely a good move.

Didn't ban beards though. I think Bridezilla has got a little carried away. Oh and I agree with the poster who said that proper posh people don't need to be told what to wear - it's clear from the address of the wedding or style of invite. We once went to a very U wedding and my DH and my old editor were the only ones not wearing morning suits. There was no mention of it on the invite, but it was at a seriously smart catholic church in west London. Clearly we were just supposed to know. We stood out like serious sore thumbs - pretty funny really!

Jojo_the_Tightfisted

Wouldn't worry too much - at the ex from Hell's sister's wedding, she first wanted no children at all. Her brother (my ex) said he wasn't going then. Which would have been really embarrassing for her, apparently.

So she said she wanted my eldest (about 7 years old) left at home because she wasn't her brother's biological child and there were to be no b*stard children there. Especially as she was ginger as well.

Then her future MIL pointed out that the groom was born 5 years before FIL and MIL married.


I don't think it was really about the DDs though, seeing as the bride then decided I wasn't to be in any of the photos, as I had a BMI in excess of 22, which was her cut off point for inclusion in the album. It was because she had *issues* with food and excessive exercise, as did all her friends. Probably a bit of class prejudice too - but then again, she just assumed there. In truth, I actually think the Tightfisted Family Tree is significantly posher, but I didn't have any desire to advertise it.


No skin off my nose, I only went because the now Ex from Hell wanted me to, apparently he would have been embarrassed if I wasn't there.


Should have taken this wedding debacle (and the instant question when DD2 was on the way 'are you sure it's yours?) as a clue this relationship wasn't really likely to go well.



If I ever get married (which is pretty unlikely, but you never know), I expect there to be Goths, indie musicians, couple of grungers, some singer-songwriter types, at least 5 beardies, a couple of rastafarians, a hippy or two, a Muslim mate who prefers biker gear with her hijab and possibly some 'normal looking' people.


If this is what the bride does for one day, she's going to be worse when the brats come along. Can you imagine the rules for viewing the first born offspring? Or the great list of banned substances for kids' parties?

sweaty_betty

sarahs999 wrote: »

We had kids at our wedding but we hired childminders and said that any kids who would get bored by the ceremony could go and play with them instead (we got married in a manor house and barn with lots of rooms so it was all nearby). In the end no one used the childminders; now that I have children myself I think it was probably overkill - I'd want my child to be there to see what a wedding was all about. Guess not everyone's would be interested/well behaved though. We also made sure there were goody bags for each of the kids on their table so they had something to do during the meal and speeches. That was definitely a good move.

We also hired children's entertainment for our wedding - not the ceremony, just the "boring" hanging around mingling bits while we had photos taken and until the evening disco. It was probably the best money we spent, the kids had a great time, with proper activities specifically for them, then when the "disco" started they just ran around in there (having had something different to do beforehand, this managed to keep them happy for hours!). It certainly wasn't to keep children seen and not heard - I specifically wanted them there as the children of our friends/family are important to me as the adults - just didn't want them to get bored.

pixelation

Jojo_the_Tightfisted wrote: »

If I ever get married (which is pretty unlikely, but you never know), I expect there to be Goths, indie musicians, couple of grungers, some singer-songwriter types, at least 5 beardies, a couple of rastafarians, a hippy or two, a Muslim mate who prefers biker gear with her hijab and possibly some 'normal looking' people.

I want to get married again just so I can do this ^^^ Mine was a quiet small wedding.

Tish_P

Jojo:

as I had a BMI in excess of 22, which was her cut off point for inclusion in the album.

WHUT

WHAAAAT

Every time I think to myself "that, there, is the most absurdly rude and ridiculous thing anyone could possibly do at a wedding", someone tops it. 'Strewth.
If I ever get married, I hope I retain the sense to invite people I like and let'em wear what they like. It's ridiculous the pressure people put themselves / each other under to have a Perfect Day.

pimento

I'll burn in hell for paying extra to have the choir drown out stone deaf Auntie Florrie's hymn singing in the church.

Hezzawithkids

Jojo_the_Tightfisted wrote: »

Wouldn't worry too much - at the ex from Hell's sister's wedding, she first wanted no children at all. Her brother (my ex) said he wasn't going then. Which would have been really embarrassing for her, apparently.

So she said she wanted my eldest (about 7 years old) left at home because she wasn't her brother's biological child and there were to be no b*stard children there. Especially as she was ginger as well.

Then her future MIL pointed out that the groom was born 5 years before FIL and MIL married.


I don't think it was really about the DDs though, seeing as the bride then decided I wasn't to be in any of the photos, as I had a BMI in excess of 22, which was her cut off point for inclusion in the album.

That's totally !!!!!!! outrageous :eek: Sounds like you're better off without that shower of !!!!! in your life.

Jojo_the_Tightfisted

Hezzawithkids wrote: »

That's totally !!!!!!! outrageous :eek: Sounds like you're better off without that shower of !!!!! in your life.

Absolutely.


Well, he's still being a nightmare well over a decade later, and there were worse things that those going on, but at least I don't have to endure the day to day soul emptying misery of being with him anymore


Moral of the story is when you discover a 25 year old man reads the Daily Mail, as do his parents and his 22 year old sister, you RUN. Especially when you find out shortly afterwards that he has told his parents he's dating a barmaid, giving the second job taken to save towards a holiday, rather than mentioning the main job (which sounded much posher).