Ms, Mrs or Miss?

roobers_2

Wilma33 wrote: »

I wish all women would use Ms. My martial status is nobody elses business. I will always be Ms, regardless of surname.

I'm proud of being a Miss, and really dislike Ms. Not sure what's worse, that or being called Mrs, when I'm not one.

JC9297

My mum was widowed in her forties, she has never remarried and so has remained Mrs Myfamilyname for the last 32 years since my dad died. I see no reason why a widow would want to change from her married name and title.

I have been with my partner for 23 years but have never married so I have exactly the same name and title as I had when I met him - Miss myfamilyname. We have two children who have his surname and I don't mind if people call me Mrs Hisname when it's related to the children, I just don't like being called Mrs Myfamilyname, that's my mum. Working in a school I have learned to grin and bear it because children mix up Miss and Mrs all the time.

Regarding Ms, if I do not know a woman's preferred title I would always use Ms when writing to them. I have never chosen to stop calling myself miss and say ms instead because I don't like the way ms sounds when spoken.

cottonhead

You can use whatever title you like - there is no rule.
In my experience, most widows seem to use Mrs ( why would you change it ? ) unless they remarry.
Perhaps because you have a new partner its making you feel a little uncomfortable and thats the issue ? If it were me I would keep Mrs - its less hassle than changing everything and would be the same name as my kids. Sorry in advance by what I say next - no offence meant - you would still be married if your husband had not died and thats why I think I would continue to use Mrs as a mark of respect.
Personally I really dislike Ms. Normally - again some people will not like what I say - seems to be used by woman who have either - gone through a messy divorce or never got married but feel too 'old' to be a Miss. Either you are single or married. Single = Miss and Married = Mrs. If you are divorced you are single !

Mojisola

cottonhead wrote: »

Either you are single or married. Single = Miss and Married = Mrs.!

Why should a woman have to tell people whether she's married or single just because she's ordering goods to be delivered or a company needs to write to her?

lostinrates

It occurs to me, why do we even need titles now? While i dislike it i do find people who might have traditionally called me 'mrs rates' now address me, unbidden, as 'lost' iyswim.

Person_one

roobers wrote: »

I'm proud of being a Miss, and really dislike Ms. Not sure what's worse, that or being called Mrs, when I'm not one.

Proud? Why?

Emmzi

we should all get PHDs so we can use Dr. Much less messing about.

jackieb

Emmzi wrote: »

we should all get PHDs so we can use Dr. Much less messing about.

When I write my cousin and his wife's Christmas card, I address it to, The Rev. and Dr. xxxx Makes a change from Mr & Mrs.

lostinrates

Emmzi wrote: »

we should all get PHDs so we can use Dr. Much less messing about.

Well, thats interesting too. In italy i am usually refered to as dotteressa, whoch surprised me, and had continual pangs of guilt for not completing my PhD...a title based as much out of presumed status as much as education so far as i can see...so a whole other layer of potential offence!

LandyAndy

I haven't read the whole thread (as usual).:o

I think continuing to use Mrs {first hubbie's name} is the thing to do. You are comfortable with it and consider it 'your name'.

As an aside re the comments on divorce..My first wife and I divorced 22 years ago. She still uses 'my' surname. She has been in another relationship for a long time but never remarried.