15 year old son trading goods at cex

duchy

If you do invite the copper round for a chat-Make sure he is the one who (unprepared) opens the door to him !

Carl31

DylanO wrote: »

I also feel that you need to drag him down to his GP and have him booked in for counselling to get to the root of the issue. If you don't come down hard on him and show him that there are serious consequences for his actions, then you'll end up with a 35-year-old son in prison.

What! lol, dont be so OTT

hes a teenager, the problem is independance. Money allows you to do things, adult things, things that his friends are doing. There will be friends that always seem to have money, and hence are always able to buy the latest things and have what they want. I imagine its partially peer pressure, partially learning to stand on his own to feet, and partially being indescisive about what he wants and has.

All kids want what they cant have, teenagers however are old enough to go off alone and obtain it. A part time job would help, most kids had paper rounds when i was younger, they dont have those now which is a shame

Seanymph

duchy is right - it's a principle thing, not a monetary value thing.

Personally I'd have him cleaning his brothers football kit or room or doing his chores as well in order to recompense his brother in a 'using up his time so he isn't under my feet whilst he's grounded way'.

Or leave it to his brother - his punishment is 20 hours community service under the service of his brother and his brother gets to choose what he uses those hours for. Perhaps 20 hours of monopoly or whatever his brothers want is will make him wise up.

quintwins

i stole alot as a teenager (amoung other things) and i did fritter it away, i stole about £20 a week off my parents and spent it all on sweets to give to my clasmates (my parents knew i stole it and caught me at it a few times), however i was being abused at home and was convinced no-one liked me, it was a way of making people like me and of acting out, i then started shop lifting and was caught yet again nothing happened, my mum never took the time to acually talk to me and find out why, in her eyes i was just a problem child, my point is there could be an good reason for this (hopefully not as extreme) punishment is all well and good but there will be a proper reason, even if that reason is just that he's greedy and wants nicer things or cash.

FatVonD

You're not alone in this, OP, both my step sons have (I believe) stolen from us. The eldest when he was living with us stole one of his OWN Christmas presents prior to Christmas :eek: My middle step son has stolen money from my son but I can't prove it (other than I counted how much was in my son's post-birthday wallet before stepson stayed in his room and there was £15 less afterwards), I broached the subject with DH and he admitted he thinks money has gone missing from his wallet before when that son has stayed over but again he can't prove it. It leaves a horrible feeling in the pit of your stomach, I was shocked and really, really hurt. If I'm honest I've not felt quite the same about step son 2 after stealing from my DS so it must be especially hard when both are your sons.

springdreams

louhel wrote: »

He has also lost out on playing football for his saturday team though I will let him keep the Sunday games (if I take everything he doesnt have anything to aim for).

I appreciate that your son needs to be punished for what he has done.

However, for him to miss Saturday training but get to play the Sunday matches is unfair to the other kids. The game should be the reward for doing the training. What motivation is there for sticking with the Saturday training if he gets to play the match even if he doesn't train :cool:

I think letting him do the training, but miss the matches is a better punishment. The match is the reward, not the training.

Just my 2p ..

louhel

The saturday is a fun thing, the Sunday is as part of a proper team thats why I made that decision.

I see your point though.

Something to think about ...

supermezzo

Does he enjoy the refereeing for the mini-soccer? Does he realise that any sort of problem on a CRB check seriously affects this sort of thing and whether or not he could even continue with it? Might be worth getting PC plod to point that out..
And for what my opinion is worth, I'd lock the iPod away and set it at a value in terms of 'credits' until he earns it back. i.e. The iPod is worth 300 credits and doing an extra household chore/study is worth 10 credits etc. That gives something to aim towards.

RAS

louhel wrote: »

I have made it clear I dont want to press charges and the police officer agreed, he offered to give him a talking to if that would help. He would even come out to the house to do it.

They arent going to do anything without us contacting them first.

I recommend a trip to the police station as this can be pretty scarey.

Googlewhacker

louhel wrote: »

Thats the thing, I am more disappointed in him than angry now.

He has been grounded, lost the ipod (whether it gets sold or not he doesnt have to know at the minute what we have done with it), lost his phone and use of laptop/games consoles for at least the month.

He has also lost out on playing football for his saturday team though I will let him keep the Sunday games (if I take everything he doesnt have anything to aim for).

He is also still to do his refereeing for mini soccer as this will earn him money with which he can pay back for the things he has taken.

I have had a brief chat with his dad and we both thinking having a chat with the police would do him no harm, hopefully they will give him a telling off.

I have emailed the protection manager and await a response so until then we dont know exactly how much has been taken. At a rough guess its approx 6 or 7 games.

He knew this morning how disappointed I was in him, I just hope it sinks in.

You know its a parental right to use the phrase 'I'm not angry with you, just disappointed with you'

Will cut to his heart like anything!!!