“I get to do what I want to do on a weekend”

Jojo_the_Tightfisted

Why not get your mum to have DS and you disappear off without telling him in advance? So when he turns up, you're not there, your DS is being properly looked after and you are off hammering the credit card in a spa, your phone is off and there are all his clothes from the previous week still sitting where they landed. All he gets is a note on the microwave saying 'Off doing stuff I want'.

pupsicola

I think you may be married to my ex. He remarried and has a child that would be around your childs age. My ex treated me almost exactly to the letter how your husband treats you. He never changed either, no matter how I approached him about his behaviour or attitude.

Seriously I hope for your sake that you can get somewhere with your husband. Straight talking is what is needed. He may be away working hard, but you work just as hard at home raising your son. You are both entitled to quality 'me' time. You should also be able to expect to enjoy family time as well.

mildred1978

Dunroamin wrote: »

If you're at home with the baby all week, why are you catching up with the washing and housework at the weekend?

If you were free of this you could either do things together as a family or do things on your own.

a) I'm not "at home" all week! I'm out most days with DS.
b) OH arrives home on a Friday night with clothes he needs clean by Monday. Leaving them till Wednesday isn't really an option! I have a huge washing machine, so do 1 dark, 1 light and 1 delicates load a weekend. I don't really want to be doing more washes during the week - that's when I get the ironing done!

jellyhead

Dunroamin wrote: »

If you're at home with the baby all week, why are you catching up with the washing and housework at the weekend?

If you were free of this you could either do things together as a family or do things on your own.

If he is working away all week perhaps he brings his washing home for her to do?

I knew a few men (well, over-18's) who did this when they were at uni. Others would use a local launderette. I suspect Mildred's OH might be the first type.

mildred1978

candygirl wrote: »

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Or he could even help her!!!:eek::eek::eek:

That implies it's my job.

Thing is, OH is getting the best childcare possible for his son, for free. I'm not a cleaner or a chef. So why is it okay that when my job is already 24/7, his job as a husband and father finishes whenever he says so?

jellyhead

If he usually works in Lincoln, could you move to Lincoln? Then you'd spend every evening together.

mildred1978

Jojo_the_Tightfisted wrote: »

Why not get your mum to have DS and you disappear off without telling him in advance? So when he turns up, you're not there, your DS is being properly looked after and you are off hammering the credit card in a spa, your phone is off and there are all his clothes from the previous week still sitting where they landed. All he gets is a note on the microwave saying 'Off doing stuff I want'.

I think I may well do that. :beer:

mildred1978

jellyhead wrote: »

If he usually works in Lincoln, could you move to Lincoln? Then you'd spend every evening together.

Lincoln???

Most of his work is in London, but not all of it.

Having lived and worked there for 8 years of my life, no thanks! He doesn't want to live there again either.

I could buy a caravan and follow him wherever he happens to be. Isn't that a good little wifely thing to do?

mildred1978

pupsicola wrote: »

I think you may be married to my ex. He remarried and has a child that would be around your childs age. My ex treated me almost exactly to the letter how your husband treats you. He never changed either, no matter how I approached him about his behaviour or attitude.

Seriously I hope for your sake that you can get somewhere with your husband. Straight talking is what is needed. He may be away working hard, but you work just as hard at home raising your son. You are both entitled to quality 'me' time. You should also be able to expect to enjoy family time as well.

Nope. I'm definitely his first wife. I refer to him as the "practice one" :rotfl::rotfl:

jellyhead

When my youngest was pre-school we didn't spend much time in the house, and when we did we were baking, painting etc. making more mess.

I don't understand the idea that SAHMs are actually at home doing their housework. My baby was a full time job.