April 2013 weddings

scared1

Little Miss!

I hear you it is a stressful time. Me and my fiancee are feeling the stress too. I found that having a weekend away for the hen do helped us to unwind. Its easy to get so caught up in the prep and forget about what you're doing. Having some quality time usually helps me feel more connected again.

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We plan to sit down and do the final planner tomorrow. It has to be in on Monday. Seems just around the corner now!

We sent everything off to the registry office a week ago and they seem to be happy about it all which is a huge relief.

Still waiting on my bridesmaid dresses arriving...the lady I bought them off has changed the dates again and isn't hearing how close our day is. I'm most stressed about this. But keep telling myself worst case scenario I can just go buy a couple of pink dresses from the high street.

Ink for printer has arrived so we can do our seating planner too...we are almost sure we know who is coming. Just a couple of last minute people who cant confirm just yet.

Just hoping for some lovely weather...as our ceremony is hopefully going to be outdoors!

Hope everyone's planning is going well...I could use a spa weekend!

daisiegg

Aww lil miss sorry you're not feeling so great we are always here if you need to vent!

sk00bie1

Oh lil miss I feel your pain! How much donation would you have to give? It is a bit cheeky of them to ask when you said you didn't want flowers!

So much has been going on with me. You know when you couldn't possibly imagine anything else happening and then it does? That's me right now =/ I don't want to go on about it all but jeez I can't wait til we're on that plane!

Flights are booked, all our hotels are booked, rental cars are booked Need the rest of my family to sort themselves out so I can book the rental house. Just that and the wedding meal to organise! Everything else can be done on shorter notice, when we're there or just before.

On the subject of meals though, Daisie have you ever been to Top of The World?

jtr2803

lil_miss_insanity wrote: »

I'm really sick of it all at the moment, if I'm honest. OH and I have had a huge falling out, which we're trying to get over right now. But it really threw me. I've just got to the point where I wish I didn't have to think about the wedding. But now everyone's wanting payments, I am having dress fittings and having to think about all the little details, which I no longer have any interest in.

The church contacted me with my invoice, including £125 for church flowers which I had said I didn't want. When I corrected them, I got this response: "The flower arranger has explained that you do not want any specific flowers so there will be no arrangement in the porch. However there will be flowers by the pulpit as we need to be ready for the following morning. We wonder whether you could give a donation towards this arrangement?" - at that point I was so fed up with the whole thing I was tempted to call it off completely. We cut out flowers because we couldn't afford them - we certainly can't afford to pay for flowers we didn't want.

I actually burst into tears with my manager at work today. Again. Work has been really stressful and I think I just snapped.

I can't wait for it all to be over with and be on a beach in Jamaica!

This.

Honestly, this wedding can go f**k itself completely, I wish I had never pushed him to get married and I wish I could go back about a year and save myself the £6k it's costing and spend on going to my dream island in the Maldives instead.

The women I wanted to make my wedding gifts never bothered messaging me back so I had to try and find someone else to paint the bridal party gift glasses at the last minute and it's cost me a fortune in postage as the new lady is in Devon!

Oh yes, my favourite moment this week was when my friend called to say she couldn't get on our website....ah, yes, that would be because the bl00dy website address is wrong! It's missing a '.' so doesn't work at all. I think the lady who printed them got it wrong but I agreed the proof. Had to take back all the evening invites I had given out already and message the people I had posted them to. Am so embarassed. Lady who printed them doesn't stock the size to re-do them but said she would cut some card down but I sent her a list of ones that need re-doing on Wednesday and heard nothing since!

Flower lady messaged me when we were in NYC to say she was doing my flowers.....are you STILL doing them? It's been 11 days already and I have a half hour drive to come and get them from you and to be honest, my weekends are getting kinda busy now!

Realised Tuesday by dress is still with the seamstress and I've heard nothing for ages, OH also still only has a suit jacket, he bought trousers today and got them home to find out they were the wrong shade......no worries, got ALL THE TIME IN THE WORLD to sort that out haven't we?

Had arguments with my mum over the readings because my daughter wouldn't read what I chose and wants to read something as a surprise, meaning I have to now re-jig the whole ceremony plan. Still need to write my vows and decide on songs for the ceremony.

SiL who couldn't come to my hen do as she was 'working' forgot to continue the lie and now apparently isn't working so can take BiL to OH's stag do which is the same day as my hen...............Ended up organising the stag do for my OH as the best man was struggling and maybe I am ever so slightly jealous that he has 17 people going out in the evening and I have about 6, most of whom I am related to..............

Car people haven't messaged me back with pick up times so struggling to know when photographer and make up lady should be there.

Asked someone to make me another table name, she asked for some measurements which I tried to give her, she said she didn't understand what I meant but it should be ok......not had an invoice or anything since so no idea what is going on there?

Ordered some last bits for my centrepieces and paid for them on Monday but no confirmation of order or payment!

Had a rotten cold since getting back from NYC and just not been able to sleep

Ok, so there are some good bits:

Great make up and hair trials this week! Ended up with hair completely different to how I imagined and so grateful she is doing it free! Make up also great, decided I wanted glam rather than natural and she did a great job with all of us, especially my daughter who just looked stunning!

Friend who I invited to the wedding has accepted , even though it means taking a day off unpaid.

We decided our entrance and exit song for the ceremony and agreed on one reading.

daisiegg

Ok, my turn for a very minor rant (although I know I am lucky that most things are going really well!)

OH got a text from his sister yesterday...just to give the background, OH's family live around 200 miles away and they were planning to drive down the day before the wedding, stay at our house with OH the night before the wedding and then we have organised rooms for all immediate family at the wedding hotel (at our expense) so they would stay there on the night of the wedding.

So OH's sister is a sigle mum with an almost year old baby...and she has now texted to ask if it would be possible for her and her mum to stay at the hotel the night before the wedding, too, as it will be a hassle to move the baby's stuff on the morning of the wedding from our house to the hotel.

The thing is, rooms at the hotel are around £120 and she doesn't make any mention in her text of paying for it herself. We're not sure but I think the implication is she's asking us to pay for it... Also, I think OH was looking forward to spending the evening before the wedding and the wedding morning with his family (I will be staying at my mum's).

I don't have any children and I do appreciate it must be difficult travelling with a baby. It's just a bit difficult to know what to say. We had arranged two nights of free accommodation for them (one at our house, where we have plenty of bedrooms and bathrooms, and one in the hotel) and now we need to try and change it. OH hasn't replied yet but is not sure what to say at all...

Argh! Families!

cats2012

Oh my god massive hugs to everyone!!!

I was really cracking last week, snapped at OH so much as was in tears multiple times, but I've had my hen do this weekend and it was amazing so I'm back to being excited again and just looking forward to seeing everyone in 2 WEEKS AND 6 DAYS - aaahhh!

My tip - go do something lovely to relax, whatever your fave thing is, I feel so much better for some pampering and wine with my friends and Mum.

My final bits to do:

- Pay people
- Choose first dance and songs for band/DJ
- Make favours and table plan
- Thank you gifts

But I think that's pretty much it!!

scared1

Looks like everyone is starting to feel the stress...have had my share too in the past few weeks but had a simply lovely weekend with my fiancee this weekend which has made me feel so much better. Spent some real quality time together - very much needed.

Also had a very productive couple of days...

Sorted out the wedding music. The ceremony playlist, The drinks reception playlist and the wedding breakfast music all installed on our IPOD. Huge job! Tick...I love ticking things off!

Sorted the wedding table name holders which I am having made as a suprise for her. They are going to be charectors from our fave show. And she has no idea.

Sent the final planners off to our venue with all the food and drink and program for the day complete.

Just a couple of things left but all are arranged...my dress fittings, the bridesmaid dresses, and she still needs to find her suit...far to relaxed for me but its up to her to sort and she isn't stressed.

Still need to sort the table planner...but no rush there. Planning some last min treats next like facials, massage, night out for my friends birthday...trying to stay calm and relaxed...and too STOP spending money.

Just so excited now! Only 36 days left! I am ready...

daisiegg

scared1, looks like you are doing well, well done This time in one month I will be enjoying my last day as an unmarried lady! eek!

However, things are getting a little bit more stressful here.

OH's sister has now made things even worse....after her text asking if she could stay in the hotel the night before the wedding (but not offering to pay for it), she then sent another one saying she has decided to travel down by train on the MORNING OF THE WEDDING.

Now, just to put this in perspective...

- The journey from her city to London takes 2 and a half hours
- The journey from her house to the city to get the train is probably close to an hour, so that makes 3 and a half hours
- The journey across London on the tube takes half an hour, so that's 4 hours
- The journey from London to the town next to our town takes half an hour, so that's 4 and a half hours, but that is with perfect connections which never happens so let's say the journey is likely to be 5 hours long
- She has never been through London on the tube before
- She has never been on a train with the baby before
- It will be the wedding morning so everyone will be getting ready and no one will be free to go and pick her up from the station
- She will be having to get across London with herself, the baby, a pushchair, their overnight stuff, presumably in her wedding outfit, on a busy Saturday during the school holidays!
- The wedding is at 1 so at the very, very latest she would need to leave at 8am, but even that would be cutting it very fine
- Her baby is a page boy so now he won't be at the wedding rehearsal, which is the night before, so the bridesmaid who is going to be looking after him won't get to practise carrying him up the aisle
- She could be travelling down the day before with her mum and brother, leisurely in a car, and then staying at our house in a nice room with its own en suite, and actually spending some time with her brother before he gets married....

We are both so confused about why she has made this decision! And quite upset. It just seems crazy and I am really, really worried that it is going to be the pre-cursor to her not actually coming at all, last minute. I don't know. I do understand she has never travelled anywhere with her baby before and never stayed overnight somewhere with him so she is probably stressed about the whole thing. But then that makes me think that's another reason why it would be better for her to travel down the day before in plenty of time with her mum and her brother!

ARGH!!

OH is really upset and stressed out. We had quite a wedding-heavy weekend with our marriage preparation course at church on Saturday and then travelling to do suit fittings on Sunday. Then yesterday evening we had to go and meet with the priest to sign the final paperwork.

On the way there OH said something like "I wish we'd just gone away and got married, this is all so much bl**dy hassle for one stupid day" or something. I cried, he apologised, we both felt sh*t etc etc.

The thing is I don't really know what else I can do to protect him from stress. I only get him involved in the things that he absolutely has to be involved in. All the nitty little details I have done all myself. Heck, I have done absolutely everything myself (apart from paying lol!). If anyone should be stressed it's me but it seems to be everyone else.

I have decided to only raise wedding related things with him when necessary - I don't need to tell him about all the little things I have done each day towards the wedding. I will try to be conscious of having whole days where we don't talk about the wedding.

The thing is, he never at any stage expressed any desire to go away and get married, he always really wanted the big traditional wedding! So I feel a bit like his attitude now is not fair.

Argh. Just feel quite stressed. It's people stressing me out rather than any actual wedding things - I think all the planning stuff is just ticking along nicely to be honest.

Oh, and I have a second dress fitting today, and I am FAT. So that is going to be good I don't think I have lost any weight since my last fitting and I may have actually gained a lb. NOT GOOD. I am going to be a beached whale bride

Argh, sometimes ranting baout things is not the best idea cos now I feel like crying

cats2012

Oh Daisy don't be down I'm sure you're not a beached whale and clearly your OH loves you exactly how you are!!

I'm so sorry we're all feeling so stressed I have 2.5 weeks to go now and not sure it's hit me - still loads to do!!

sk00bie1

daisiegg wrote: »

OH's sister has now made things even worse....after her text asking if she could stay in the hotel the night before the wedding (but not offering to pay for it), she then sent another one saying she has decided to travel down by train on the MORNING OF THE WEDDING.

- She could be travelling down the day before with her mum and brother, leisurely in a car, and then staying at our house in a nice room with its own en suite, and actually spending some time with her brother before he gets married....

We are both so confused about why she has made this decision! And quite upset. It just seems crazy and I am really, really worried that it is going to be the pre-cursor to her not actually coming at all, last minute. I don't know. I do understand she has never travelled anywhere with her baby before and never stayed overnight somewhere with him so she is probably stressed about the whole thing. But then that makes me think that's another reason why it would be better for her to travel down the day before in plenty of time with her mum and her brother!

ARGH!!

Oh dear Daisie Did you ever reply to her first message about staying in the hotel the night before? Could it be she is uncomfortable with staying in someone else's house but not staying in the hotel? If you said no to that, perhaps she sees this as the only alternative. Would you/could you pay for the hotel if it would mean she was there the night before?

On the way there OH said something like "I wish we'd just gone away and got married, this is all so much bl**dy hassle for one stupid day" or something. I cried, he apologised, we both felt sh*t etc etc.

The thing is I don't really know what else I can do to protect him from stress. I only get him involved in the things that he absolutely has to be involved in. All the nitty little details I have done all myself. Heck, I have done absolutely everything myself (apart from paying lol!). If anyone should be stressed it's me but it seems to be everyone else.

I have decided to only raise wedding related things with him when necessary - I don't need to tell him about all the little things I have done each day towards the wedding. I will try to be conscious of having whole days where we don't talk about the wedding.

The thing is, he never at any stage expressed any desire to go away and get married, he always really wanted the big traditional wedding! So I feel a bit like his attitude now is not fair.

I agree it doesn't sound very fair to me! But I wouldn't worry hon, he probably just said it in the heat of the moment, I think it's a guy thing, they do come out with the most insensitive stuff sometimes, something to do with the way they see stuff in black and white maybe?

I don't think you can 'protect' him anymore than you have! And maybe you shouldn't have to in this instance, it's his family and his wedding too! And not fair that you should have to shoulder all the burdens! As he said himself, it's only one day so he should be able to help you sort it out! Sorry if this sounds like I'm being horrid about him, I understand he works in a stressful job

Argh. Just feel quite stressed. It's people stressing me out rather than any actual wedding things - I think all the planning stuff is just ticking along nicely to be honest.

Oh, and I have a second dress fitting today, and I am FAT. So that is going to be good I don't think I have lost any weight since my last fitting and I may have actually gained a lb. NOT GOOD. I am going to be a beached whale bride

Argh, sometimes ranting baout things is not the best idea cos now I feel like crying

^^^ This! It's definitely people stressing me out, the wedding stuff I'm actually enjoying at the moment.

I haven't lost anymore weight either, ughh. Can't really do much about it now, am just going to try and look after myself so I'll have good skin and feel 'healthy'. Also might get my teeth whitened, every little helps as they say!

Everyone needs a rant (don't worry I've a rant to follow after this post :rotfl:) I think it's definitely true that a problem shared etc etc and also it's better out than in!