name confusion

JB1971

jackieb wrote: »

I give up.

totally agree

SingleSue

I had two nans, when we were with them, we called each of the nan, when we were not and to define which one we were talking about, we said nan L (her first name) or nan H (surname). By marriage, I had one nan who we addressed as nan C (her surname) when not with her but nan when with her.

For my boys, they have two nans and a step nan (ex husband's new wife's mum) and for a time, 3 great nans....the two nans are called nan or nanny when they are with them and nan I or nan M when they are not. The great nans were called nan C, nan H and nan L, the step nan is called by her first name only.

They're not confused at all and never have been.

Saint_Chris

But, your stats show that you've been on this site long enough to know

should have done the old .........................regular user, changed username for this....blah blah

coolcait

Saint_Chris wrote: »

should have done the old .........................regular user, changed username for this....blah blah

Possibly. But that wasn't the point I was making.

You've been on MSE for yonks, have posted many times. You know that it's very rare to see a thread where the replies are all basically telling the OP that they're in the wrong.

I don't think that the replies would have been any different if you had posted under an alias.

The situation is that clear cut - even though you have the advantage of being able to spin it to make yourself look good, but hard done by. Yet, despite that advantage, you have been roundly told that this is only a problem because you're making it into one.

Like the others, I'm out now.

*max*

I have no idea what happened for the OP to delete all their posts, but for what it's worth...Kids will call you what they call you and that's it!
Often when they learn to talk they will get names wrong, and those will stick. I have been calling my older brother by the name I "came up with" as I was learning to talk, and I still do! And he doesn't mind, nobody does. It's our "thing" I guess!

My nephew was just born (my brother's child), and I had several conversations with my mum about what we would like him to call us. She can't make up her mind (even harder because her and the other grandma have the same first name! lol). We came to the conclusion that it didn't matter. Baby - and then toddler - will call us by the name that they 1/ can pronounce and 2/like. Baby will know who they are talking about, and will find a way to differentiate. And it will be special.

Edit: it's even more awkward because I live in the UK, but I'm French. They live in France, but my sister in law is American. So I will never know what language to speak with my nephew! It's started already, so confusing. lol

Edit again: WOW...having read the thread, I'm kind of sorry I posted now. Really, adults are falling out and having hissy fits about this non-issue? Scary.

Slinky

Aren't I glad I slept through this lot............

Tiddlywinks

OP - I'm detecting a bit of resentment towards your mum - not just over the name thing. You mentioned (and then deleted but someone else had already quoted it so it's here anyway) how you get you mum over every week for a meal and how you do a lot for her - as if she then "owes" you the choice of Nanny as a name.

Given your user name choice of Saint Chris as well I'm guessing that you do feel sometimes that you go above and beyond... I think there's more to this than just the name, I'll bet that your relationship with your mum has always been a bit competitive. Now is not the time to turn this into something that will split your family up - take control, "let" your mum be Nanny and let her know that this is your choice and gift to her..... and then just enjoy the chuckles of a new baby.

CH27

What a sad thread. Adults arguing over what a much loved child is going to call them.

Redouble

My children have 3 grandmas, and did have 2 great grandmas whom have sadly passed.

All of them are/were Nanna through my children's choice. My mum wanted to be Grandma, but my kids called her Nanna. She signs cards grandma sometimes but has no issue with being Nanna at all. If my children want to clarify which Nanna, they add their name (So Nanna Jean, Nanna Sarah etc)
Nobody cared that great grandma was also Nanna.
It is not a competition, just enjoy your grand babies, they love you, they don't care what label you give yourself xx

JodyBPM

My children call my mum and dad Grandma and Grandad, and DH's mum and dad Nanny and Grandad. Obviously that means they have 2 Grandads. It's never caused any confusion though - if they are talking to us and need to clarify which Grandad they are talking about, they just say "Grandma's Grandad" or "Nanny's Grandad".

IIRC, Nanny actually wanted to be called Nan, rather than Nanny, but the children just chose to call her Nanny. Honestly, as the child grows up, it will make its own decisions over what to call you, and if a distinction is needed then the child will automatically do that.

This whole thing is a mountain out of molehill IMO, focus on what is important - your lovely new grandchild, who cares what she calls you!