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name confusion

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Comments

  • Tiddlywinks
    Tiddlywinks Posts: 5,777 Forumite
    I've been Money Tipped!
    Life is really too short for this kind of dispute in a family - you need to just be the adult and choose something else. The alternative is to force your mum to always be "nan" and then watch her like a hawk to make sure she doesn't slip up - is this any way to live?

    I recently lost my mum unexpectedly after a very short illness - this has concentrated my mind about what's important in life... and this is not really looking like making my top 100. Sorry, don't mean to sound unsympathetic BUT really...?
    :hello:
  • jackieb
    jackieb Posts: 27,605 Forumite
    Part of the Furniture 10,000 Posts Combo Breaker
    My childrens grandparents (and my own) were all called Granda and Grandma. When we were them they were called Granda or Grandma, but when we were talking about them anytime they weren't there and we wanted to differentiate between them, we'd just say, 'It's Grandma Cathy, or Granda Bobby, etc. No-one ever got confused.
  • Saint_Chris
    Saint_Chris Posts: 3,876 Forumite
    edited 3 February 2012 at 2:15AM
    .......................
  • ellay864
    ellay864 Posts: 3,827 Forumite
    Part of the Furniture 1,000 Posts Combo Breaker
    I also agree with the idea that you could be nannie Chris, it's easy for a child to cope with and spares a problem you really shouldn't be having. My mums parents both divorced and remarried and I had a nan, nana Mary and slightly bizarrely nana in Middlesex!
  • Gingham_R
    Gingham_R Posts: 1,660 Forumite
    I had 3 grannies growing up and it never occurred to me that it might be confusing. If I needed to clarify who I was talking about I used their second name. My niece also calls both her grans granny. She clarifies by using their first names.

    My children use Gran and Grandma, but that was just what they wanted to be called.

    Let your mum have what she wants. There's no reason you can't have the same name. Be nanny 'Chris'.
    Just because it says so in the Mail, doesn't make it true.

    I've got ADHD. You can ask me about it but I may not remember to answer...
  • Gingham_R
    Gingham_R Posts: 1,660 Forumite
    but why should i change a name to my grandchild i've always wanted to be known by,.

    There's absolutely no reason why you should.
    Just because it says so in the Mail, doesn't make it true.

    I've got ADHD. You can ask me about it but I may not remember to answer...
  • Savvy_Sue
    Savvy_Sue Posts: 47,477 Forumite
    Part of the Furniture 10,000 Posts Name Dropper
    I can see why you think it is important to get consistency so everyone knows - couldn't each of you be nanny+first or surname? That's what we do in our family.
    What we always did too.
    Eliza wrote: »
    My mum was Grandma Seaside for years, and two granddads in the family are named after their cats - so Granddad Tigger and Granddad Puss. They love it.
    Our boys have always had two grandmas, and two granddads. For a long while they were 'with' and 'without' the doggies, because both sets lived in the same place. Then my parents moved, so now we distinguish by where they live (especially as the doggies are no more).

    But surely to goodness this isn't worth falling out over? And if you listen to yourself, you're upset because you're not getting YOUR way with what you're called, but you're also upset because your mother seems to be getting HER way, and according to your husband 'she knows what she is doing, she just wants her own way'. And you don't? ???
    Signature removed for peace of mind
  • jackieb
    jackieb Posts: 27,605 Forumite
    Part of the Furniture 10,000 Posts Combo Breaker
    You don't need to change your name, neither does your mother. Your granddaughter won't get confused. Give her some credit. My sister's 2yo granddaughter calls her Grandma, she also calls my mum, her great-grandmother, Grandma as well. If two Grandma's are int he room at the same time, my mum gets called Grandma Jean, and my sister is just Grandma. She's not exactly Einstein but she knows who's who. :)

    Your mum can be Nannie Maureen or whatever. It's really not a big deal.
  • GracieP
    GracieP Posts: 1,263 Forumite
    I called all my grandmothers and great-grandmothers, nana. It didn't cause any confusion. If I was referring to one specifically they were nana w-surname, nana m-surname, nana f-surname and nana c-surname, if I was just talking to them they were nana. (As nana w-surname still is.) It wasn't at all confusing, after all I had 3 aunts and 9 uncles and lots of grand-aunt and uncles who I also referred to as aunt and uncle. I knew their relationships to me, I knew that 2 were actually my parent's grandparents.
  • Saint_Chris
    Saint_Chris Posts: 3,876 Forumite
    edited 3 February 2012 at 2:16AM
    .............................................
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