Can't bare to have toddler son sleep on his own in his bedroom

HappySad

Are you like me?

Son now 3 and baby on the way. I cannot bare to think of son having to move into his bedroom to sleep there on his own. I know all about those SuperNanny and TinyTearAway programs all working hard with parents to get their child to sleep on their own in their bedroom.. I just don't want him to.

I personally don't like sleeping on my own and I love sleeping in a room with Dh & son. When I was single I did not like sleeping on my own and teddy would then serve the job of pretending to be a person.

Will wait until new baby is 2years old then older and younger child can then go together into their own bedroom. So they will have company in the night.

this sort of thing is normal in my family but in many families the children go into their own rooms when they are babies.

Son has no issues with confidence and being away from both parents and can happily stay with friends + nursery confidently.. so no attachment issues there.

Do other families work the same also?

I know of a few other friends that operate in this way also. And it has only been in the last few generations that we were able to afford to each have our own bedrooms and in lots of countries around the world it is quite normal for everyone to sleep with company.

misty

My son slept in his own room at a month old - he didn't like or settle in his moses basket. I wouldn't have been able to sleep with him in my bed in case I squashed him. He did look small in there but he was fine and came in first thing in the morning for a cuddle and still does. That worked for us. However, if you don't want to part and he and your OH are happy don't do it. It's your family and up to you as to what you do

Spendless

So are you going to have all 4 of you sleeping in the same room till the baby is 2 . Is there room for a start? How do you get any privacy? My eldest has sleep problems still stemming from when he was a baby and frequently he plonks himself in our bed even lying along the bottom of the bed if he thinks he will be spotted and moved :rolleyes: . He's nearly 7 and it's just not comfy for us to have all 3 together. I wish he'd stop it, so not for me.

Rachie_B

Personally i find it a bit strange lol
but each to their own and all that

I do see it a bit as making a rod for your own back ,and just because your family / someone you know have always done it ,doesnt make it right ?

Why would a 3 yr old need "company" in the night ? lol he/she should be asleep ?

Like i say I do find the idea quite weird TBH ,why wouldnt you want just yourself and your partner in the room of a night time ?

I love mornings when my son comes in our bed for a cwtch but would be well weird to have him sleep there all night every night ! lol

hobo28

Do you have an OH? What does he think?

Personally I think he should go in his own room. Sounds to me like your trying to make excuses but deep down that you know he should. Apologies if I'm way off base.

Rachie_B

I am reminded who you are now,by re reading your other thread which is on this page again.

Do you think your depression is having an effect ? and making you want to keep your child close to you ?? doing it for yourself and not for your son.

lewt

i think if you keep both the kids in yuor room untill then they will grow up feeling uncomftable when they are single like you did dont you think?

Fizog

Had you thought that maybe your lad's sleep may be disturbed with the new arrival wailing for milk in the wee small hours? Just a thought. You will find that all your waking thoughts are not wrapped up round your eldest as the new baby saps your energy and sleep. I found it really wierd when I had my second child that it was almost an unconscious feeling that most of my focus was on the helpless new born.. even though I consciously didn't stop what ever I was doing to rush to the baby every time he cried i mad sure the 3 yr old nose wasn't pushed out of joint BUT I felt he was big enough to survive on his own....primeval or what?
You must do whatever is right for your family some people breast feed their offspring till they are 8!
Mind I have a friend who was still taking it turns with her husband to sleep on a camp bed by their 10 year olds bed every night as he couldn't sleep without someone holding his hand every night as he fell asleep!! He never went to cub camp/ school trip in year 6 because his parents couldn't come too.

tiff

I think if the children are staying in your room for this long they wont learn to go back to sleep on their own when they wake up during the night. I could understand if his bedroom was on the other side of a large house, but if its a normal semi/terraced then his room would only be feet away. You can use a monitor if you need to hear him breathing etc.

How can you tell your then 5 year old that he's slept with Mummy and Daddy all these years but now he has to move to his own room, I would bet there would be some separation issues and it wouldnt be easy.

ziffius

If the son will be happy with it, then it seems fine to me. Would have thought it would upset your Son to be moved into his own room, and then be replaced in your room by his sibling. Personally I find it a little 'cold' to put a baby in it's own room.

Smiley_Mum

Both my children slept in a cot from day one and had no problems. They never slept in with me at all and they happily went from cot to bed as well, no problems. They had a good routine set and have never had trouble sleeping etc. If your child is happy to sleep in a room on his own then fine. I wouldn't have him sleep in with you, feel you are going to be making problems for yourself further along the line which are unneccessary. Surely your child would get a better sleep undisturbed in his own room rather than all four of you being in a room together. That's just my opinion, but what you do is up to you.