MSE Newborn to 1 year Baby Club 1

fluffnutter

sexymouse, all your struggles with breastfeeding sound totally normal, especially in the first few days. Your experiences almost exactly mirror mine. I struggled to get Freddie to latch properly and he too had a touch of jaundice. If there's one thing I can say to you, it's hang on in there. It WILL get easier I promise. The midwives, books and support workers aren't telling porkies when they say it takes 4 - 6 weeks to properly establish BFing. That's not to say it will be difficult for that long - it won't, rather that it won't completely fall into place for a few weeks yet. As long as Jonathan puts weight on, then don't worry about a thing. Sore nipples can be dealt with, poor latching can be dealt with, honestly there's very little that you won't be able to overcome with the right support.

katiechoc_2

sunshine_1988 wrote: »

Hi katie
Sorry to hear sleep still bad
Hopefully its that he is ready for weaning and it settles down soon. Hope the HV can give you some advice if not.

I was super excited about weaning too. I do think that just a small meal mid evening really filled him.

X

I hope so too.

I meant to ask earlier - do you ladies have any recommendations (or things to avoid/are unnnecessary) for weaning?

Hope those with bf issues get them sorted soon, I was one of the lucky ones and had no problems with it. I can't imagine how hard it must be to go through what you're going/have gone through.

*Nutella*

No one tells you just how hard BF can be - you just get told how 'natural' it is. My LO was what I now know is known as a lazy feeder - she would latch on and then stay there for hours, having a bit of milk, then falling asleep, then a bit of milk etc. The HV told me that it's normal to feed for 'as long as 30-45 mins at a time' - which made me think I was not getting things right when my LO would often feed for three times longer than that. I had plenty of milk, and if I had perservered I think BF could have worked out. Instead I spent three weeks crying and being utterly miserable, topping up with formula and feeling like I was letting my little girl down. I eventually gave up BF and switched to formula only. It was a tough decision, but it was the right one for us. I've stopped feeling guilty as she's happy, healthy and thriving, but I know how hard it can be. My OH was a star though - he said he'd support my decision no matter what I ended up doing, and that I was already giving our LO what she needed most: love and care. Sounds a bit cheesy now, but at the time it made me feel so much better...

Only you can decide what's best for you and your LO. Happy mummy = happy baby, so go with what you want to do, whatever that is I think Fluff is absolutely right to highlight the importance of the right support - if I had gone to the BF support group (couldn't face it - was in so much pain from the c-section), spoken to a different HV etc. then things might have been different. If BF is what you want, access all the support available to you - then at least if for some reason it doesn't work out, you'll know that you tried everything.

*Nutella*

janninew wrote: »

My Cousin who has a baby who is 7 months was shocked that I gave her an Ella's pouch when we met for coffee on Friday! Somebody shoot me, giving my baby baby food! :rotfl:

Shocking Jannine! How could you?!... :rotfl:

sexymouse

Thanks everyone - I wish someone in the health services would publish a breastfeeding troubleshooting guide to take home with you in those first few days, as I know that they tell you how important it is, but don't tell you what to do in the middle of the night when you're tired, the baby is crying, your boobs are rock hard as your milk is coming in and you can't express by hand as it hurts so much. I'm lucky that someone was able to come out to me so soon, and that the lady who came today came in the morning (the one the day before came in the afternoon, so I was already stressed by then and so was Jonathan). The good one from today is coming back tomorrow to see how things are going and is going to text me in the morning to let me know when. Midwife is also due tomorrow at some point to do the heel !!!!! test etc.

So today: The first feed after the MSW left, I managed to get J to latch onto the left breast for a couple of minutes on his own - milk went everywhere when he pulled off as he lost concentration. I tried him at the right breast (his least-preferred one that he's never latched onto) and he couldn't latch still. So whilst Moon was feeding him 5ml of formula with a syringe (provided by MSW), I expressed the right breast and then topped him up with that after.

Next feed (the latest one): This started around 5pm. He would not latch to either breast to feed, so Moon fed him some formula through a syringe whilst I expressed from both breasts. I felt quite proud as I managed to express 13.5ml total, whereas when MSW had been here I'd only managed 2ml. J had all of those and was still hungry! So he had some more formula. He's wrapped up now and I think he's gone to sleep as Moon is looking after him and all is quiet. Poor thing has cried himself hoarse though.

I'm hoping that he will latch on tonight, as he seems to concentrate more on latching when it's dark. It would be great if I don't have to top-up with formula too. Can't believe how much he ate at the last feed! He's obviously making up for lost time.

I'm determined that I'll get to the stage where I don't have to use formula top-ups at all (I may try to express in between the next feeds a little to try to stimulate my own milk supply to produce more - is this a good idea?)

*Nutella*

Sexymouse - yes, expressing between feeds is definitely a good idea, especially whilst your supply is getting established as it's very much a demand and supply thing. You might also find that having some expressed milk ready in time for his next feed helps you relax a bit because you know that you have a back-up if he's struggling to latch - and being more relaxed can in turn help BF as babies can sense if you're worried or anxious.

Great that you've found someone who's able to help I completely agree with the troubleshooting guide idea - the health service seems so focused on BF being 'easy' and 'natural' it's as if they're unwilling to publicly admit that it can be really hard work!

sexymouse

Thanks Nutella - I'll definitely do that then - will try to do some in a minute whilst Moon is making dinner, as he's currently having Daddy cuddles (J is fast asleep after his mammoth feed).

Gillyx

Yes brilliant idea Sexymouse I know another few ladies who done exactly that, and then slowly reduced the formula feeds you are doing brilliantly xxx

*Nutella*

Oh, and also - if your boobs are rock hard and hurting, a bit of expressing can relieve the pressure and help you feel better, even if you end up not using the expressed milk because he's able to get what he needs directly from the breast.

fluffnutter

sexymouse wrote: »

Thanks everyone - I wish someone in the health services would publish a breastfeeding troubleshooting guide to take home with you in those first few days, as I know that they tell you how important it is, but don't tell you what to do in the middle of the night when you're tired, the baby is crying, your boobs are rock hard as your milk is coming in and you can't express by hand as it hurts so much. I'm lucky that someone was able to come out to me so soon, and that the lady who came today came in the morning (the one the day before came in the afternoon, so I was already stressed by then and so was Jonathan). The good one from today is coming back tomorrow to see how things are going and is going to text me in the morning to let me know when. Midwife is also due tomorrow at some point to do the heel !!!!! test etc.

So today: The first feed after the MSW left, I managed to get J to latch onto the left breast for a couple of minutes on his own - milk went everywhere when he pulled off as he lost concentration. I tried him at the right breast (his least-preferred one that he's never latched onto) and he couldn't latch still. So whilst Moon was feeding him 5ml of formula with a syringe (provided by MSW), I expressed the right breast and then topped him up with that after.

Next feed (the latest one): This started around 5pm. He would not latch to either breast to feed, so Moon fed him some formula through a syringe whilst I expressed from both breasts. I felt quite proud as I managed to express 13.5ml total, whereas when MSW had been here I'd only managed 2ml. J had all of those and was still hungry! So he had some more formula. He's wrapped up now and I think he's gone to sleep as Moon is looking after him and all is quiet. Poor thing has cried himself hoarse though.

I'm hoping that he will latch on tonight, as he seems to concentrate more on latching when it's dark. It would be great if I don't have to top-up with formula too. Can't believe how much he ate at the last feed! He's obviously making up for lost time.

I'm determined that I'll get to the stage where I don't have to use formula top-ups at all (I may try to express in between the next feeds a little to try to stimulate my own milk supply to produce more - is this a good idea?)

You're doing everything right, sweetheart. I know it feels like a chaotic mess at the moment, but things will become more settled. If you can't get him to latch, express and bottle/syringe/cup feed. Syringe or cup are recommended when they're little so they don't get nipple confusion (but, TBH, Freddie had expressed milk from a bottle every other feed for about 10 days and he's fine with boobies or bottles (or cups or syringes!)). Definitely keep expressing to keep your milk supply up, but try to get J actually on the booby as much as possible as having your baby suckle is more effective at getting your supply right than expressing.

One thing, how long are you trying for before you decide to syringe feed him? In the first few weeks it used to take me anything up to 10 minutes to get F latched on. It seems like an eternity, especially when they're screaming but keep trying because he needs to practise.

Some tips that helped me - try a different position. I use the reverse cradle as it's reckoned to give you more control, especially with newborns and their bobbing heads! Say he's on the right booby, then I hold him with my left hand at the top of the back with just a finger on his head, then support my right boob with my right hand. Touch his nose to the nipple, wait until his mouth opens wide (which they only do fleetingly when they're small) and bang, whack him on there.

One other thing I had to do - tie his arms to his body with my dressing gown cord (bad mummy!). He used to want to get his hands in his gob or his arms in the way generally and I couldn't get him in the right position.

It gets so much easier as they get older - their mouths get bigger and they stop flailing about so much. Now F dives straight in, gets a great latch straightaway and off he goes. Unless he's got a burp, then he'll start squirming and I have to stop, wind him and try again. Sometimes he even grins whilst he's on the boob. Always makes me smile