you know when all you lovely people give advice...

PeachPickle

ali007 wrote: »

Option 1 - Left hand up all those who think they are great at their job?
Option 2 - Right hand up those who think they fluked their way into their job and are just waiting to be found out?

Right hand for me , even after 2 promotions in 6 years (or shoudl that be especially after 2 promotions.......)

I'd totally agree with that. Had a moment of madness when I applied for my job, it wasn't anything I ever thought I'd end up doing! Always waiting for them to realise I'm a bit rubbish :rotfl:

Go for the job that you want to do PAP, rather than the one you think you should do. Good luck!

spud30

I'm def option 2 - no idea how i even got my job, never even bloody applied for it :rotfl:

Even my DH asks how the heck I got the job :rolleyes:

postingalwaysposting

postingalwaysposting wrote: »

so here we go...

so soa ~
£100.00 ~ mum
£70.00 ~ bt (i am hoping they will reduce this soon as there is no debt on this account now :rolleyes:)
£11.00 ~ house insurance
£3.28 ~ bike insurace
£48.00 ~ bus cards
£6.00 ~ deno
£180.00 ~ driving (i so wish i could scrap this :rolleyes:)
£18.00 ~ xmas savings
£300.00 ~ savings (sig)
£50.00 ~ me money

sub total ~ £786.28

reinstate accounts ~ £80.91

total ~ £867.19 :eek:

I also want to phone the bank up on payday and cancel both overdrafts, £100 on my bills and £50 on my spending account as this really is debt in all honestly...

:doh: only got payed £799.26... dont know what to do now sainsburys are sending me my £50 back but it could take 7~10 days... i am stuck now :rolleyes:

bobbadog

postingalwaysposting wrote: »

:doh: only got payed £799.26... dont know what to do now sainsburys are sending me my £50 back but it could take 7~10 days... i am stuck now :rolleyes:

Hey PAP - can't you just save a little less this month? So long as you catch up again next month it'll make no difference at all xxx

RAS

Hi posting

Missed your posts for a bit.

Agree with bobbadog, save a bit less this month. This will happen sometimes. it is a bit like a diet, some people start, eat something that is not on it, decide the diet is a disaster and drop out. Others eat something that is not on the diet think, whoops, should not have done that, try to do better tomorrow. Guess who loses weight?

Posting, you have had some rather rough years. So you have learnt to react fast and possibly use the reflex to "motivate" you into sorting it out, given that there was not a lot in there for you when you sorted it out.

it does not have to be like that for ever, not even for today. yeh, stuff is c**p sometimes. You are young (really very young), and have had to cope with a lot for someone your age, without much support until recently. This may sound contrary, but you may need time for your reactions to get as old as your skills. Does that make any sense?????

What happens is that we learn reactions and we keep using them even when they are no longer appropriate. To get personal for a minute, a few years ago I was attacked. For months afterwards, if I heard feet running or walking fast towards me, I would totally freak out, heart pounding, adrenalin pumping etc. OK, I know rationally about fight or flight reactions, I knew rationally that buggins was locked up (he was on licence so was pulled straight back in), and I still reacted as if I was in danger. When I looked round, it would be some kid running for the bus.

I understood what was happening, which meant I was able to keep on top of the situation, but eventually I asked someone to help me. We explored how I would react if I knew that it was just a kid running for a bus. In my imagination I just experimented with how to react in ways that left me feeling better about it, then I rehearsed this time and time again in my mind. So next time, I heard footsteps, I had learnt a different way of reacting and could just look over my shoulder and think, kid running for a bus. Obviously, if I looked over my shoulder and saw a strange man running at me in a threatening manner, I still had the fight or flight option, but only when it was appropriate. it really did help my stress levels.

Your stress reactions have been learnt from living in a very difficult situation over which you had no control. Things still are not perfect, but they are better and you may want to update your responses? I know it is not as easy as all that, but it is worth thinking about.

And on the job front, at the ripe old age of nearly 22, you have at least four careers in front of you, should you settle down to one sometime in the next five years. Go try admin, see how you feel wiping old dears bu8s, fly a kite someday. It really is fine to shift jobs, sometime you will shift employer as well, others you will just end up doing stuff that was not in the job description. How are you going to know if you like "it" if you only try one thing?

You do not need to make THE decision, just a decision, to give this a try for a while. Given that you have only had two jobs so far, a couple of years of moving around, with the specific purpose of trying new situations to learn new things would look fine as long as you articulate that on your CV in 2 years time.

As for work experience, do you do any paperwork in your current job, or in your previous job? How much experience of paperwork and admin have you got from sorting out you family's finances?

Write a list of the things that you do/ have done in your jobs and of your responsibilities. I am trying to get into a book shop to see if I can track down a good book on CVs that I have used and has a really good section on non-standard job histories.

take care, save a little less and cut yourself some slack.

rAS

lynsayjane

postingalwaysposting wrote: »

lynsay, your last comment is exactly where i am, although i hate my job i find it great as it pays my bills allows me to save and i have no worrys/stress but i dont know i feel people think that i should be aiming for more... but at 21 i dont want to make life changing decisions, i know i can change but i dont want to be someone who is chnging jobs every 2 years...

eeek

today pap I stopped enjoying my work and I'm not sure the fun will come back to it! I very very nearly (and still might) walked out there and then. EVERYONE I work with said they'd be totally up the creek without the paddle if I left and I am so tempted... but the sensible side kicked in (stupdi dfw brain *kicks*!) so I didn't...we'll see what tomorrow brings!

anyway I wanted to add my family experience. My mum left my dad at about 30ish. She then managed to raise two pretty darned fantastic (if I do say so myself) girls by herself, work part time and put herself through uni to get a computing then teaching degree and at 40ish became a computing teacher (did ya see that coming there? :rotfl: ) and bought her first house etc etc. My aunt just turned 40 last xmas and is just about to finish her nursing degree after working in a social care type setting with new mothers and their kids and having been a nursery nurse etc

My point is that these days you can spend so many years doing a job then change for something better paid/more fun and not have any stigma attached. What you do now does not have to be what you do for the next 40 years!

postingalwaysposting

thanks ras and bobbadog, ok i am not worrying so much but its like first hurdle and i fail :rolleyes: anyways...

work was even worse today, i got 'talked to' because i didnt do this that and the other last night, but the stupid man wont look at the bigger picture :rolleyes: and i so wanna hand in my notice on thursday, just to give them all the two fingers and leave there. I am sick to the back teeth of always putting on a brave face grrrr

my driving instructor hasnt phoned back so i guess in havent got a lesson tommorow, i dont know if thats a good or a bad thing :rolleyes: thats two i have missed now and my test is in a month..

anyways... new soa ~

£100.00 ~ mum
£70.00 ~ bt
£11.00 ~ house insurance
£3.28 ~ bike insurace
£48.00 ~ bus cards
£6.00 ~ deno
£180.00 ~ driving
£18.00 ~ xmas savings
£50.00 ~ me money
£80.91 ~ reinstate accounts
£200.00 ~ savings (sig)

total = £767.19

i know i have left £32.07 over but as i am scrapping my overdrafts i think i will use this as a saftey net plus when they take my charge out i need £30 in there before i send my begging letter out :rotfl:

postingalwaysposting

lynsayjane wrote: »

eeek

so today pap I stopped enjoying my work and I'm not sure the fun will come back to it! I very very nearly (and still might) walked out there and then. EVERYONE I work with said they'd be totally up the creek without the paddle if I left and I am so tempted... but the sensible side kicked in (stupd dfw brain *kicks*!) i didn't...we'll see what tomorrow brings!

anyway I wanted to add my family experience. My mum left my dad at about 30ish. She then managed to raise two pretty darned fantastic (if I do say so myself) girls by herself, work part time and put herself through uni to get a computing then teaching degree and at 40ish became a computing teacher (did ya see that coming there? :rotfl: ) and bought her first house etc etc. My aunt just turned 40 last xmas and is just about to finish her nursing degree after working in a social care type setting with new mothers and their kids and having been a nursery nurse etc

My point is that these days you can spend so many years doing a job then change for something better paid/more fun and not have any stigma attached. What you do now does not have to be what you do for the next 40 years!

snap :rotfl:

ahh i see what you are saying, i know i can change jobs whenever but its a confidence thing i guess :rolleyes:

lynsayjane

postingalwaysposting wrote: »

snap :rotfl:

ahh i see what you are saying, i know i can change jobs whenever but its a confidence thing i guess :rolleyes:

I can promise you I know how that feels. Everyone see's me as being the confident sensible one, but you wanna know the truth? I'm so not. The people who think that don't see me on the kitchen floor paralysed with tears or the times I start drinking in the house, which is not very often and only when I'm broken, but I can get in some states.

I want to find someone who can take some of the burden, someone I can come home and just collapse into his arms and have my hreat break knowing he'll help to pick up the pieces...probably why most men fall by the weyside.

You'd be surprised by how many people you feel are so much stronger than you feel even smaller on the inside. They're just better actors.

postingalwaysposting

lynsayjane wrote: »

I can promise you I know how that feels. Everyone see's me as being the confident sensible one, but you wanna know the truth? I'm so not. The people who think that don't see me on the kitchen floor paralysed with tears or the times I start drinking in the house, which is not very often and only when I'm broken, but I can get in some states.

I want to find someone who can take some of the burden, someone I can come home and just collapse into his arms and have my hreat break knowing he'll help to pick up the pieces...probably why most men fall by the weyside.

You'd be surprised by how many people you feel are so much stronger than you feel even smaller on the inside. They're just better actors.

too true :rotfl: i hope you do find someone though lj, you deserve a nice hunky man


right i thought i would post this here before i start a new topic and see if anyone can help... i am just trying to work out something... now if i needed £330.00 per month take home and i work for £5.70 per hour and my tax code would be 522L c u m how many hours per week will i need to work? would it be 20 hours or 15?