MG - The Matrix Re-wired

Marru

Thank you both.

I wish I could do a trick: oops I bought a house in Finland, oh didn't you agree for us to move - sorry but I have bought it now so we have to go!

If he hadn't jumped the gun I would be ok letting them go (with strict agreement that this was a trial and would not set a presedence) but I can't allow him to just assume things and then go ahead making arrangements (not the first time - he says he had booked hotel and such for a weekend he knew I wasn't around but cafcass hasn't even agreed on over night stay until he has completed the parenting courses).

And the how it then turns into a threat: I will show the tickets to DD and yabba dabba dab.

The whole issue us being in this mess is because I can't trust him to stick with what is agreed.

Memory_Girl

.............. and CAFCAS will see right through it.

Because the sad fact is - that he isn't even original. Mos CAFCAS, Social Workers and Childrens Panel members would just roll their eyes again and think "Oh Fabulous - another one, how boring!!"

Oooo - carpenter chappie has arrived.

TTFN

MG

Bitsy_Beans

Marru what I really think of EX can't be posted as swear filter prevents me LOL

Personally he's not going to like it but I agree with sticking to court order. You cannot trust this man, ever. Look at him the minute you won't play ball he's willing to use his own daughter and her upset as a stick to beat you will. The sick !!!!!!.

Crickett hope all went well xx

fantasia322

I found this expressed exactly what I wanted to convey to my adult children, so its what is handwritten in their individual christmas cards.
I just loved the words, so would like to share.
So for Anne-Marie, David, Marc, Stevie, Kris, Suzi & Jamie.

I gave you life, but I cannot live it for you.
I can teach you, but I cannot make you learn.
I can give you directions, but I cannot be there to lead you.
I can teach you right from wrong, but I cannot decide for you.
I can offer you advice, but cannot accept it for you.
I can give you love, but I cannot force it upon you.
I can teach you to share, but I cannot make you unselfish.
I can teach you to respect, but I cannot force you to reciprocate.
I can advise you about friends, but cannot choose them for you.
I can tell you about lofty goals, but I cannot achieve them for you.
I can teach you kindness, but I cannot force you to be gracious.
I can teach you morals, but I cannot make you ethical.
but
I can love you forever regardless of your choices.

Kittikins

Thanks for sharing fantasia, that's beautiful x

Triciaxx

Marru: I wish I could be surprised at your current dilemma but, to be honest, most people who have been in your situation will nod wisely and say "Been there, done that." And that includes me!

The only way, in the long run, is to get DD in the loop. Let her choose if she wants to do this extra (which she probably will but may surprise you :eek:).

She will see through him as she grows up and you will be able to laugh with her at what Pippi Longstocking, not from the book but from MSE, calls, mildly but effectively "Silly Daddy".

All this advice is fine but - you are there. You know the situation. You should do whatever you feel is right for DD - nothing else matters.

Dorastar

School disco - I now stink of hotdogs and onions!

Actually managed to be a mummy today cos dh was being Santa so I was able to wangle way out of work and pick up kids from their school. Ds's reaction "yay mummy":j Dd's reaction "what you doin' ere?":eek:

Boss even more nangy today but can't say why on here - but enough to say he might have a rough time ahead and I am making sure I am squeaky clean and all t's crossed and all i's dotted. Have worked out a holiday plan to get all paperwork up-to-date and even get a few things done in advance. Going to have to buy a few notebooks I think!

Memory_Girl

I got walls and everfink!!!!

Everyfink being copious quantities of plaster dust everywhere - so off to the shower I go.

Cleaning day tomorrow - so early night.


Ooooooo - Singing in the rain on RVP - wohooo!!

MG

tellmeitsfriday

Photo day tomorrow, not cleaning day x

G;ad it's getting there :-D

Marru

Thank you ladies. He had been to the school play today and hadn't said anything to DD about Saturday. So I will take DD to see him but only for the allocated time in the original agreement. If he doesn't bring her back on time then he will be in trouble not me.

Off to bed, I know it is early but I am pooped. How I wish I had a sauna - I am too tired for bath (mine takes forever to fill), oh perhaps one day...

Well done MG for all the building work, very impressive :T