I know this can't be solved I just need support

singlef

Tixy wrote: »

You've mentioned paying council tax - but if your only income is benefits then you would usually receive full council tax benefit - do you not? and have you checked that this is correct?

If you are paying ctax and cannot claim ctax benefit, are you paying as those there are 2 adults in the house or just you? does your aunt have an exemption? does she qualify as "severely mentally impaired" and so entitled not to pay? (e.g. my great aunt with alzheimers was not liable for council tax).

How much housing benefit are you both entitled to? does this not cover your rent?

We do get full council tax benefit but we have to pay water charges at about £220 a year, we also get housing benefit and this has been calculated in my budget.

singlef

RAS wrote: »

Hi

Have you asked for a up to date assessment of the benefits to which your auntie is entitled? And checked that you are getting all that you can?

I think a discussion with CAP might be a good starting point.

Yes all her benefits are up to date. I have been on the cap website but it does not seem to load when trying to find a centre near me, I will keep trying though. thanks.

dark^knight

Hi,

Sorry to hear about your situation. However, there is almost never any problem that cannot be resolved.

It may seem really difficult right now, but you will get through this. We have all been through similar hard times and we know what it's like.

People will always be here to help and support you.

^dk^

MrsTinks

Whilst the debts are in your mothers name then our normal avenues are somewhat closed... I suppose that it is still out of the question to get some of the debt into your own name with a loan or credit card? At least if you could do that you could default on them and address them.
Where you are living - is this the cheapest there is? I know it might be unsettling for your aunt to move but if you can find something cheaper it might be a way forward...
Ultimately you might not have liked the situation your aunt was in before but it might be that you need to think about letting someone else care for her, even in the short term so you can find somewhere cheap, get a job for a while and get yourself on an even keel again. Once you have dealt with your debts to your mum then you can look at finding somewhere affordable for you and your aunt again...
It might also give you a little time to sort out those dark thoughts without having to worry about her?

alice23

Hello,
It might be worth thinking about whether paying off the minimum on the credit cards at the expense of everything else is the right thing.
What do you think would happen if you stopped paying them? Would your mum get a shock and be more helpful? Maybe then she would consider helping you by getting a loan over a longer term.
Only you can weigh up what is the morally right thing to do, given that she tried to help you before and you ended up getting into more debt. I think it is quite common to end up spending on the card that you think is going to help you reduce your debt.
None of this is worth trying to take your life over though.

Also, look into charities that might be able to give you a lump sum, which would help you.

Also, are there things that you could make to sell while you are at home during the day? Maybe if you look in the craft books in the library or on etsy or some of the posts here, you might get some ideas. You could probably use freecycle to get the materials you would need.

Also, I wonder whether you can afford to be driving your aunt to her appointments. If you got rid of your car, would she be entitled to a car through some kind of motibility scheme?

alice23

Also, do you have a spare room that you could rent out?

LandyAndy

singlef wrote: »

I have filled in the form on this site and I am £332.94 short every month and that is living the way I described. God help me if anything breaks down and as for Christmas and Birthday presents for others or haircuts well it just isn't happening!

So post the SoA on here.:)

singlef

LandyAndy wrote: »

So post the SoA on here.:)

I tried but as I am a new user it would not let me

singlef

alice23 wrote: »

Hello,
It might be worth thinking about whether paying off the minimum on the credit cards at the expense of everything else is the right thing.
What do you think would happen if you stopped paying them? Would your mum get a shock and be more helpful? Maybe then she would consider helping you by getting a loan over a longer term.
Only you can weigh up what is the morally right thing to do, given that she tried to help you before and you ended up getting into more debt. I think it is quite common to end up spending on the card that you think is going to help you reduce your debt.
None of this is worth trying to take your life over though.

Also, look into charities that might be able to give you a lump sum, which would help you.

Also, are there things that you could make to sell while you are at home during the day? Maybe if you look in the craft books in the library or on etsy or some of the posts here, you might get some ideas. You could probably use freecycle to get the materials you would need.

Also, I wonder whether you can afford to be driving your aunt to her appointments. If you got rid of your car, would she be entitled to a car through some kind of motibility scheme?

I already have the car through the mobility scheme, and due to her mobility we could not do without it. I had considered getting a cheap car and sending the mobility one back but in the long run its not a good idea as i would have the insurance to pay and all maintenance and mot costs. I also don't have the cash to actually go and buy a car.

I have been looking at charities and if I want a holiday or help with a washing machine or something similar I could apply but nothing to help pay off debts that I could find.

I have had many a sleepless night thinking about defaulting on the payments therefore forcing my Mother to help but this is not an option, as desperate as I am I just don't have it in me to do something like that.

singlef

alice23 wrote: »

Also, do you have a spare room that you could rent out?

I do have a spare room, but a number of reasons mean I can't rent it out.

1. It is against my tenancy agreement to sub let.
2. My Aunt has quite severe learning difficulties and behaviour problems, I do not get much sleep at night so trying to rent a room to someone with the risk they might not get much sleep is not an attractive selling point.