am fuming, sorry its a rant

blue_monkey_2

OP, why don't you call the police and ask them what your son has reported as you have had a call from the school.

I am not saying she needs to punish the lad, she needs to find out what he has told the school and also what he has told the police. She also needs to speak to the friend and find out what really happened. The friend will also be a witness and will need to be interviewed with his parents.

Also, reading the last post, why he waited to call his mother, if it was enough to call the police, why he did not call him mum too.

'Of course the man has pushed him, he doesn't tell lies'. You only know they are telling a lie when they get caught out. Maybe you have not caught him out yet. ALL children tell lies be it a small lie or a big lie, I refuse to believe that your son has never, ever told a lie - sorry. It's catching them out that is the art and some kids (like mine) are just pretty rubbish liars.

mirrorimage0

i have this morning they just said it is being investigated and will get back to me in 72 hrs

newcook

Gavin83 wrote: »

You've got to give the police some time to investigate this!

To be honest I don't think you can punish your son for this and I don't see why he needs to apologise, currently you don't actually know he's done anything wrong.

To be honest even if he did do something silly I'd be taking it further. There's no excuse for an adult assaulting an 11 year old boy.

what if it turns out that the man didnt touch him?! he may have just been 'in his face' telling him off for messing about by a road where they could cause an accident. in which case he should be fined for wasting police time as well as being punished for telling lies and mucking about!

euronorris

mirrorimage0 wrote: »

it wouldnt be no good reason though if it is a threat,bear in mind also he is 11 sorry 12 tomorrow not 15 or 16 so when i find out more later i can make the judgement and also if my son has done something wrong, he will see being taken to and from school as a punishment anyway

theres no way he will go unpunished if there is something he and his friend has done

But that's just it, I don't think it is a threat, per se. More a tactic to scare your son into behaving in future.

The chances of this guy driving past at the same time your son is at the bus stop again is probably pretty slim. It was a van right? Which likely means he travels around a bit for work and at different times, rather than being in rush hour traffic every day.

mirrorimage0

have just spoke to a police operator again, and they are coming round this evening to take a statement. but they wouldnt say what was reported exactly.

my son wouldnt of said he was touched if he wasnt. im hoping it wasnt just a threat and just a scare tactic if he has done something stupid, but i will know more later

euronorris

blue_monkey wrote: »

'Of course the man has pushed him, he doesn't tell lies'. You only know they are telling a lie when they get caught out. Maybe you have not caught him out yet. ALL children tell lies be it a small lie or a big lie, I refuse to believe that your son has never, ever told a lie - sorry. It's catching them out that is the art and some kids (like mine) are just pretty rubbish liars.

It's also worth bearing in mind that the OP's son may have exaggerated. The guy may have been ranting and raving at him, the OP's son felt upset and indimidated by this, possibly (and probably) even angry, and so has exaggerated the truth in order to secure a more sympathetic response from the responsible adults in his life.

I know I certainly did that more than once as a child. And yet my Mother would've said at the time that I didn't tell lies, because for the most part I didn't. But no one likes to be caught out like that, and exaggerating the truth can easily secure a more sympathetic response.

Again, this is all maybe. Her son may well be telling the truth. I'm not excluding that either.

mirrorimage0

im not saying he has never told a lie of course he has but he knows the difference when its serious, ie he told me he had breakfast the other day when he hadnt but soon came back down to tell me sorry and he hadnthe just wanted to finish some homework first. he knows i find everything out and has given up trying to pull the wool over my eyes lol

rachbc

I can't beleive most people seem to think its ok for a adult man to push, threaten and intimdate a young boy and that it was probably his own fault if it did happen

claire16c

mirrorimage0 wrote: »

of course the man has pushed him he doesnt make things up and tell lies. what i need to get to the bottom of later is what my son has done prior to this.

There is a chance that your son didnt do anything wrong, my friend was once followed to school by a nutcase and her Dad was convinced she was making it up to get attention. Well one day he followed her down her road, she had to run into a neighbours house and call the police and it ended up with her having a retraining order against him. So there are loonies around.

However all children tells lies or at least make small fibs - and its normally when they think they will get into trouble if they tell the truth. So perhaps your son happened to leave out the part where they threw a stone at a car, for sake of argument, because they didnt realise at the time how dangerous it was, but have realised now and is panicking.

hopefully you will find out later.

euronorris

rachbc wrote: »

I can't beleive most people seem to think its ok for a adult man to push, threaten and intimdate a young boy and that it was probably his own fault if it did happen

I don't think it's OK. Definitely not the pushing part, IF it happened like that. But I do think it is understandable for someone to react in such a manner IF they nearly crashed (or perhaps even run over the OP's son) due to the careless and dangerous actions of a child. I can very clearly remember my Mum's response the time I ran off in a car park and got lost as a kid. There was screaming, shouting, telling off and a smack on the bum for that one. And I've since learned that she reacted so strongly because she was sooo terrified that she'd lost me, or that someone had taken me.

Not right, but understandable. Not the kids own fault, but a likely outcome that he should be aware of, and not shielded from.

And for that reason, I think that ferrying the son to and from school would be an over reaction to the situation.