Shocked and desperately need advice!

going2die_rich

A question to ask is how and where this money has gone. As last thing you want is for this uphill struggle to be sorted only for him to go and do it again. After all everyone says it won't happen again but some do end up back where they were later on.

I think downsizing if possible will be the quickest method to paying it off. But with 5 children thats probably not the most practical.

A second part time job over the weekend for the hubby maybe? or yourself if he looks after the kids?

raq

dizzydaydream wrote:

My husband yesterday had his 'lightbulb' moment and revealed that he's got £50,000 worth of debt in credit cards and loans that I knew nothing about!
I've just given birth to our fifth child (yes, number 5! Ages 11,9,7,4 & 7 weeks) and don't know where to start to sort things out! Any advice is extremely appreciated, I've listed below our incomings and out goings as best as I can but unfortunately can't give the % on the debts at the mo' as need hubby to sort them out.
Please help us sort out this mess.

Income

Husband's Salary - £1500 flat without OT but OT available
My Salary -£0 at mo' but when I am working varies from £100 - £800
Other - £257.50
Child benefit - £210 (not including newborn yet!)
DLA - £176.60
TOTAL - £2144.10

Out goings

Northern Rock Mortgage - £920
Council Tax - £106
Gas & Electricity Powergen - £87
Sky tv & phone - £56.65
BT line rental - £11.50
Wanadoo Broadband - £17.99
Tesco Dog Insurance - £13.94
Repair Protection - £7.50 (don't know what it's protecting! Will find out!)
Centrepoint House Insurance - £31.58
American Life Insurance - £4.95
Charity - £16.00 (Definitey going!)
Magazine subscription - £1.50
L & G Assce Insurance - £68.98
Kids' Performing Arts Classes - £180
Shopping - £400
Petrol for 2 cars - £150 (need both as hubby works shifts)
Car Insurance - £70 (total guess-both paid in full)
Mobile phones - £100 (mine & kids are payasyougo, hubby on contract)
School trips/swimming etc - £20
Cigarettes - £100 (He'll have to quit)
Work snacks/food - £70 (:eek:)
TOTAL - £2433.59

SAVINGS

£21,000 - Inheritance from Mum :A
£400 - Tesco shares if sold at present rate
£3,000 - ISA
Hubby has Tesco SAYE & BAYE share schemes running

APPROX. DEBTS AND PAYMENTS

MBNA - £6000 MONTHLY PAYMENT £150
MORGAN STANLEY - £3500 MONTHLY PAYMENT £90
MINT - £4000 MONTHLY PAYMENT £90
AMEX - £800 MONTHLY PAYMENT £30
ABBEY - £10000 MONTHLY PAYMENT £313
EGG - 4000 MONTHLY PAYMENT £90
CITICARD - £8500 MONTHLY PAYMENT £270
EGG LOAN - £13000 MONTHLY PAYMENT £284

TOTAL PAYMENTS PER MONTH - £1317

Surprisingly he hasn't missed any payments but I've had to dip into my mum's money since not working to pay for things. I was a bit miffed as thought my hubby was just being tight but alarm bells rang when a loan company phoned to discuss a loan for £40,000!

I can see that there's a few things that we can cut back on and know that sadly my mum's money is going to have to go (hard to face as still hurting from the loss). We also have equity in the house but when I 'phoned they won't let us borrow any more for six months as a payment was missed in October (it's all up to date now). Has anybody got any ideas of how to get rid of this big black cloud and what would be the best move first?
Thanking you in advance xxx

First can I say many congratulations on the birth of your baby. Hope all went well.

Our 3rd baby was born 4 months ago and my husband thought I had post natal depression because I was always in a daze and crying all the time. the baby is fantastic so it wasn't that, it was the fact that I hadn't told him about 3 credit cards that I have run up over the last 5 years. Totalling to £8,00.00. I know this must be small to yours but I was in a terrible state. I finally come clean in november when I couldn't cope any more and just fell into his arms crying. He was great, am just so sorry I didn't tell him before. He blamed himself aswell and not just him. We are working on it now and he has also cut them up. We are on a tight budge but it has learnt my lesson. It will take us about 3 years to clear, but I have now started to enjoy the children just like I should.

My advice, work through it together as much as you can. I will be thinking of you all and CHIN Up.



There are a few things that you can cut down on the above and am sure a lot of people on this site has already pointed out.

misspoppy

Hi

This is going to sound really mean but I don't think you should throw all your Mum's money at this debt, you are still coming to terms with the loss. I know it makes financial sense but I also think you need to protect yourself and save it, come to some agreement to give him a % less than 50% and keep that money in a savings account in your name so if anything happens its there for you.

I think it would be wise for you both to go to see CAB, CCCS or PAYPLAN so you know what is advised as welll. Your husband does need to learn this lesson and throwing £20k won't teach him anything.

Take care and good luck

halloweenqueen_2

I'd get back in touch with the tax credits as you have a change in circumstances with your new baby. Congrats on the baby BTW!!!!

dizzydaydream

Thanks for all your helpful replies! I don't think I'm ever going to get to the bottom of where the money's all gone plus part of me is too scared by what I may discover. Unfortunately we can't downsize, we're in a four bedroom house now and was looking to move!

all_hours

Hi,

Find out the APRs on the loan and cards. Is it just one loan and the rest are cards.

I'd look at the cards he has to see which have the best life of balance deals. Then use some of the savings to pay those cards off. Wait until they are totally clear then ask for the deal. Then transfer off the other cards. Wait until they are clear then transfer the next few cards. Keep going until all the card debt is on low life of balance.

Also look at the terms and conditions of the loan. Can you make overpayments or would you have to pay it all off in one go. It could work out that paying off the loan first and the cards with the best l.o.b deals means paying less interest overall than paying off the highest interest cards.

Based on the SOA you've posted when you aren't working the household outgoings are £300 higher than income - could this account for some of his debt - he's tried to keep on top of things during the periods of lower income? What was your average income last year? When do you plan to go back to work.

There are things missing from your SOA such as xmas and birthday expenses, days & evenings out, car repairs and servicing, household repairs etc. With 2 cars and 4 kids (until recently) these add up over the year.

The mortgage company won't let you release any equity but would a repayment holiday or an interest only mortgage be an option until you go back to work?

Adrasteia01

Hi,
To answer your previous question, I think the websites for payplan and CCCS are https://www.payplan.co.uk and https://www.cccs.co.uk.. If I'm wrong I'm sure someone will correct me.

Only you will know what you're willing to cut back on, and also contribute to the debt. I'd say have a look at the figures, interest etc and work out how much the interest will be too. It could be hundreds a month adding to the debt. That's why it might be a good idea to pay off a fair chunk of it, although if you could freeze/reduce your interest it would make it a lot easier to pay it off.

Even though consolidation might sound like a good idea, there would be a longer repayment term and you (or he) would probably end up paying a *lot* more interest in the long run. Consolidated loans are also usually secured on your house, so if you didn't keep up repayments you'd risk losing it. I think you need to look at the figures and make an informed decision.

Sorry for asking, but are you sure your husband hasn't used his cards at all for online gambling? I'd say most of the other people I've seen on here with debts in excess of 50k have run it up through online gambling. Even if it only contributed a bit towards the amount, it's something to be wary of as it's easy for people to do the same thing again.

I certainly mean no offence, but I'd say to get a more specific idea of how to combat your debts, have a look at the statements and see exactly what your husband spent the money on. It's good to be aware of what items he's inclined to spend a lot on, so you can convince him not to! <G> Doing so might not be easy at times.

Also to make a bit of money here and there check out https://www.pigsback.com and https://www.quidco.co.uk (i think it's co.uk). They're sites where you can click on links to earn points, enter competitions, get vouchers, and they offer discounts off certain products etc. You wouldn't get a lot back from them, but in pounds I'd say I've got back about 60 pounds of bookshop and boots vouchers from pigsback so far. Can't sign up to quidco though because I'm not in the uk. From what I've heard it's a goodie.

Tamara

all_hours

Adrasteia01 wrote:

Hi,
To answer your previous question, I think the websites for payplan and CCCS are https://www.payplan.co.uk and https://www.cccs.co.uk.. If I'm wrong I'm sure someone will correct me.

Tamara

Adrasteia01,

There's a link in the resource bar at the top for the list of non profit debt agencies.

dizzydaydream

Hubby has joined an Extras agency to get some extra money in but because he does 12 hour shifts he never has the same days off each week so it's impossible to get a part time job! I'm a children's entertainer and party organiser so can work around him but due to the new bubba (breast feeding plus c-section) I wanted a bit of a break! I did work right up to the week before baby was due and also did two parties afterwards that were already booked (it nearly killed me!).

all_hours

Adrasteia01 wrote:

Hi,

I certainly mean no offence, but I'd say to get a more specific idea of how to combat your debts, have a look at the statements and see exactly what your husband spent the money on. It's good to be aware of what items he's inclined to spend a lot on, so you can convince him not to! <G> Doing so might not be easy at times.

That's a good idea to go through the bank and credit card statements to work out where the money has gone.

I know £50,000 is a lot but if it's built up over 7 years the amount of overspending each month might not be as high as you first think - especially when you add on high CC interest and the charges for withdrawing cash - as he's been doing to make the minimum payments.