Taxi...from an ugly duckling to a swan

taxi73

elantan wrote: »

Have you done meditation ? Just wondering I that may help calm you and help with the feelings of wanting to run away ( I would say come up to mine but you would need to bring the polar bears to keep you warm )

have done a long time ago and may be helpful now so can give it a go

taxi73

seems like loads of people up early and all your work done already

taxi73

hubby just gone to work..think I'll try and get some sleep soon..just having toast and cuppa first..thanks all for being there x

elantan

Sleep well my dear, hope you get some rest and that helpful phone call

Your more than welcome for the chat it's always good

taxi73

thanks EL x

rising_from_the_ashes

Hi Taxi hope you're having a lovely snooze now .... just popped in to say "hi" - your diary is one of the ones I've started to read many times but always felt a bit like I was intruding on .

Re the meltdown .... totally allowed - glad the nurses were supportive (I had one when I was kept in in October & they were useless:()... keeping my fingers crossed the Councillor is in touch today.

duchy

Hope you finally got some sleep Taxi
Everyone needs to vent somewhere and you know you're with friends -but those dark, dark thoughts of yours I suspect aren't very unusual for someone in your shoes. You've battled through treatment once and thought -it was harder than I thought but this time you're going there with full knowledge of how tough it *can* be . There's an expectation that people battling cancer are going to be brave and valiant and bear it all with fortitude and a smile but I know many people who've admitted afterwards it was so bloody hard and they could only express the kind of feelings you have to professionals or other patients or past patients and not to their family or friends. So kudos to you for admitting it's hard -and reaching out. You are grieving .......for the recovery you expected and angry and you are perfectly entitled to be. Do you have access to MacMillian ? I think they could be really helpful to you.

The_Dragon

Hugs Taxi and I am sorry you are having a meltdown, this is your diary and if you can't vent your fear and frustrations on here then where can you? Passes over more virtual Jaffa cakes, mince pies and mulled wine.

lucielle

Morning Taxi (again). Hope you manage some sleep and the phone call comes through.

L

Piquant_2

duchy wrote: »

Hope you finally got some sleep Taxi
Everyone needs to vent somewhere and you know you're with friends -but those dark, dark thoughts of yours I suspect aren't very unusual for someone in your shoes. You've battled through treatment once and thought -it was harder than I thought but this time you're going there with full knowledge of how tough it *can* be . There's an expectation that people battling cancer are going to be brave and valiant and bear it all with fortitude and a smile but I know many people who've admitted afterwards it was so bloody hard and they could only express the kind of feelings you have to professionals or other patients or past patients and not to their family or friends. So kudos to you for admitting it's hard -and reaching out. You are grieving .......for the recovery you expected and angry and you are perfectly entitled to be. Do you have access to MacMillian ? I think they could be really helpful to you.

Wise words here taxi. It's so unfair having to go through it again, I wish I could sort it out for you.

I have battled cancer twice too and I understand how you feel. It helped me a little bit to stop thinking ahead, just live in the now and do as little as possible apart from rest. Watch as much trashy television as you can bear, eat as much chocolate as you can and try to stop thinking about tomorrow. I promise your brain won't stop, when needed it will kick in again. This is about getting through now.

I hope the support you need comes through for you today, if you can, open up to them as you have to us. They can help.

Darling taxi, you've helped me so much recently, I want so much to do the same for you, feel free to contact me anytime.

Piq x