Which way around should it be?

Lotus-eater

Torry_Quine wrote: »

I'm not saying that anyone can't celebrate at Christmas, I'm saying that they should at least acknowledge 'the reason for the season'.

The christian reason for the season. The other reasons for the festivities were there before christianity.

lostinrates

Torry_Quine wrote: »

I'm not saying that anyone can't celebrate at Christmas, I'm saying that they should at least acknowledge 'the reason for the season'.


.

we celebrate more than one reason for the season, the Christian one in defenrence to my background, the older one, which I feel as well as being referenced as pagan is IMO, a fundamental way to keep spirits up at a dull time of year, and a cultural one....merriment and a little indulgence.

The reason for the season is not just Christianity, but Christmas sounds nicer than ''midwinter duoldrums avoidance knees up''.

Torry_Quine

JC9297 wrote: »

But why would you need to lie about them, answer in an age appropriate way yes, but no need not to be honest.

If you've taken drugs you may not wish to share that with your children.

Lotus-eater wrote: »

The christian reason for the season. The other reasons for the festivities were there before christianity.

It's called Christmas, the clue is there. I have no problem with having a good time, to a point but not at the expense of Jesus' birth.

lostinrates wrote: »

we celebrate more than one reason for the season, the Christian one in defenrence to my background, the older one, which I feel as well as being referenced as pagan is IMO, a fundamental way to keep spirits up at a dull time of year, and a cultural one....merriment and a little indulgence.

The reason for the season is not just Christianity, but Christmas sounds nicer than ''midwinter duoldrums avoidance knees up''.

Sounds like you have things in proportion

digitalphase

Torry_Quine wrote: »

It's called Christmas, the clue is there. I have no problem with having a good time, to a point but not at the expense of Jesus' birth.

But it's not at the expense of anything, nor should it cause any disrespect. Surely it shouldn't matter to Christians if non-believers chose to celebrate Christmas in different ways to how you would? If everyone - or the majority, anyway - can dedicate that one day a year to spending good time with family, surely that's a good thing?

In reply to the subject of 'lying' to children, well, whoever says that don't or won't is a liar themselves. One poster gave some really good examples of when you may tell an 'untruth' to a child. It encourages a child to be diplomatic, and to get on with people in the future.

There are occasions where the truth would land you either in trouble, unpopular or both.

A small white lie like "yes darling, your first cake that you made at school was simply delicious" (when it tasted rank) is not harmful to the child. In fact it's the opposite. If you were truthful and told your child that their efforts were crap then you'd be knocking their confidence. They'd been really proud of making that cake and you went and hurt their feelings. If it carried on when they got older you could do some serious damage to your child's self esteem. They will learn by themselves that their cooking needs improving

I fully intend to indulge in the fantasies of the tooth fairy and father Christmas with my son. Why not, you're only a child once!

Sambucus_Nigra

Torry_Quine wrote: »

If you've taken drugs you may not wish to share that with your children.

Paracetamol are drugs, why shouldn't children know that a parent has or had a headache?

Torry_Quine wrote: »

It's called Christmas, the clue is there. I have no problem with having a good time, to a point but not at the expense of Jesus' birth.

Oh dear...

Hub

Torry_Quine wrote: »

It's called Christmas, the clue is there. I have no problem with having a good time, to a point but not at the expense of Jesus' birth.

I think this is the first post which mentions this.

If the OP likes to celebrate birthdays, atheist or not, there's surely no harm in celebrating Jesus' birthday, is there?

Torry_Quine

Sambucus_Nigra wrote: »

Paracetamol are drugs, why shouldn't children know that a parent has or had a headache?



Oh dear...

I suspect by drugs the person who first mentioned them meant something a little stronger.

Hub wrote: »

I think this is the first post which mentions this.

If the OP likes to celebrate birthdays, atheist or not, there's surely no harm in celebrating Jesus' birthday, is there?

I agree that celebrating Jesus' birthday ie Christmas is good. It's the OP who doesn't want to using her atheist beliefs as the reason.

saidan

this thread is fascinating - and shows it takes all sorts for the world to go round

we are pratising christians - so celebrate christmas- but not really the commercial side of things....

we never had a tree, but once our children came along they wanted one - so we had one......with an angel of the lord on top LOL :rotfl:
we don't do santa at all - our kids know other children believe and know not to spoil it for them, this means no grotto's, no being santa in the school play etc
we do have gifts - but they know they are from us - and they take great delight choosing gifts for their little cousins/friends. they will say 'we give presents to remember Jesus' birthday'...our house does not look like an argos store however, they have one main gift (this year lego fire set) and a stocking from us with little things eg, chocolate coins, crayons, toy car, bouncy ball. they do have gifts from the rest of the family. we don't write letters to santa or have a 'wish list' - the boys accept gifts without writing lists for others to look at (it helps we have no TV so no adverts for months before lol)
we send cards - but only religious cards to our closest friends/family - the children send an 'oxfam' card to their whole class eg we bought 500 school lunches - rather then cards to individual children.
we attend church on xmas morning - they open stockings, go to church, have lunch then open their main present.

we never planned to do the tooth fairy - and had never told them about it. ds1 came home last year with his first lost tooth in an envelope from school - and said 'if i put this under my pillow the tooth fairy comes with money for it' :eek: so as we didn't want to break his heart we did it.......we're not thrilled about this 'lie' but also accept that he goes to school and has chosen to believe this...i'm sure it will do him no harm when he learns the truth though

OP if i were you i'd send a 'best wishes' card - or a blank card with a nice picture and write a lovely message - or your ds handprint with his good wishes for the season or something.......there is no point hurting others feelings over something this silly.

i find xmas so so commercial these days - i struggle to make it religious for my family, i'm sure you could have a lovely day without even trying to taking the 'jesus' bit out of it - if you wanted to do that for your ds it is very much possible.

hth, saidan

jackyann

Lotus-eater wrote: »

You mean lie?

I can't really answer for that poster, but really, answering in an age-appropriate way is not lying.
I answered all my kids' questions in a way that I felt they could understand, leaving the door open for more questions. I did not lie.

And this thread has really polarised!
I always found it very easy to talk about Santa, Jack Frost, the Tooth Fairy, witches, Till Owlyglass, the entire cast of Star Wars, Robin Hood, Arthur (and my own beloved Hereward) and loads of other things, giving the impression that these are myths & legends, but they're not real. Neither I nor my kids ever remember "believing" in Santa.

I love myths & legends, they can be ways of explaining important things. It's quite easy to tell kids those stories, which often contain universal truths within them, without giving the impression that they are literally "true".
Our family count the Christian myth & Biblical stories as just that.

Mildred - stop worrying. Acknowledge whatever the g-gps do in a good spirit. As for how you handle any of the festivals that come your way as a family, you will find your own way of doing things. Some of the more sensible posters here have pointed out that a generous spirit is the most important, whatever you decide. Kids very soon get used to family members doing things differently.

Lotus-eater

Torry_Quine wrote: »

It's called Christmas, the clue is there. I have no problem with having a good time, to a point but not at the expense of Jesus' birth.

Well Jesus wasn't born at this time anyway, so what's your point?

Are you saying...... that everyone who doesn't believe in Jesus being the saviour and born on this day, shouldn't join in the Christmas celebrations?

It's become in modern times, so much more than the religious holiday it once was (in the perfect past that we live in sometimes) and is a general gift giving and good will to all men time.

I would have thought, as a christian, you were more than happy for this to continue.