what are the best value dating sites?

System

So after scouring POF for what seemed like ages i gave up and went back to OkCupid, and someone caught my eye And i've just messaged him...now to see if he replies!

I'm so crap at first messages!

lufcgirl

xXMessedUpXx wrote: »

So after scouring POF for what seemed like ages i gave up and went back to OkCupid, and someone caught my eye And i've just messaged him...now to see if he replies!

I'm so crap at first messages!

I hate first messages too! I wrote one this afternoon and got a reply about an hour later. I was nervous incase I'd messed it up! Then I've had constant replies, quite long messages too, for the rest of the day. Now I'm trying to figure out where to go from here. Do I just carry on messaging like this forever or do I ask for their number?!

There_Goes_Trouble

Ask for a number if you're comfortable phoning, or just arrange a meet up if you prefer face to face. Just coffee, or a quick drink or something like that. Go on, before you get cold feet!

coin_operated_girl

So I'm back from my date now. It went OK. It wasn't amazing but it wasn't awful either. We went to a pub for a drink and then we went for food. He booked a table at one of Jamie Olivers Italian restaurants because I mentioned at one point that I like Italian food (so that was kinda sweet) and then we went for a walk. Hes a nice guy but I think I found him a little bit boring. He kept describing things in a lot of detail that was completely irrelevant to the story- but maybe that was just nerves. I know I talk a lot sometimes when I'm nervous. There were a couple of awkward silences, but on the whole it wasn't too much of a struggle to make conversation. He asked if I fancied doing it again sometime so I said yeah. If he hadn't of asked then I wouldn't have been that bothered and I probably wouldn't have asked him, but since he did ask I figure it can't hurt to see him again, just to see what happens.

lufcgirl

There_Goes_Trouble wrote: »

Ask for a number if you're comfortable phoning, or just arrange a meet up if you prefer face to face. Just coffee, or a quick drink or something like that. Go on, before you get cold feet!

Well she asked me to go on the chat thingy on there so I did, and I kept asking her height. And it turns out she's 4"10 and I'm 5"7 so it really just wouldn't work for us. So she was lovely to talk to anyway for the evening and a really nice person, but I don't think I'm attracted to someone that much smaller than me.

There_Goes_Trouble

That's a shame lufcgirl, but I know those things are important, I wouldn't like a much shorter partner either.

Coin Op Girl sounds like you might have made a good start there, I like a man who takes note of what you say (Italian food), remembers it and uses the info wisely! And don't forget that the majority of relationships start out with people just kinda getting along OK, and then they grow.... so maybe that's better than the crash bang fireworks 'spark' we all seem to think we need on a first 'meet up'!

coin_operated_girl

There_Goes_Trouble wrote: »

That's a shame lufcgirl, but I know those things are important, I wouldn't like a much shorter partner either.

Coin Op Girl sounds like you might have made a good start there, I like a man who takes note of what you say (Italian food), remembers it and uses the info wisely! And don't forget that the majority of relationships start out with people just kinda getting along OK, and then they grow.... so maybe that's better than the crash bang fireworks 'spark' we all seem to think we need on a first 'meet up'!

Yeah, I was very impressed! I think you're right. I guess when you meet on a dating site as opposed to in real life its easy to think that there should be fireworks because theres more pressure for it to be that way. Whereas when you meet someone in real life you have a bit of time for things to develop before you start dating.

runningwoman wrote: »

Sounds great love! (ooh tell us was the food was nice at Jamies? - I had leftover curry tonight and a stale mince pie )

Seriously, judging by your previous posts, this sounds EXACTLY the kind of thing you need right now - not necessarily meeting someone perfect who you really want to get into an LTR with straight away, but just dating a few people, getting the confidence boost from realising "hey, I KNOW I can get male attention from nice eligible men who treat me well, but what do I want".

And as you're - what - early twenties, something like that, you have LOADS of time to date around, have some fun nights out with men when you don't necessarily think are going to be the "one", before settling down.

(I met someone when I was twenty one who I thought was "it". Split up a couple years later and was devastated - he was my world. Of course those feelings were genuine at the time, but having been out with...cough...a "few" more fellahs now .....I can look back and think "Christ I would have missed out on X, and Y, and Z if I'd stayed with him.....", so I can see how Gods plan worked out fine....)

The food was very nice A stale mince pie does sound pretty good too though

Yeah you're right, this probably is what I need right now. This whole experience has given me a confidence boost so far. I know I'm nothing more than average looking so its been flattering when I get messages from people (even if most of them are just after one thing, its still flattering to think they don't find me completely repulsive ) and so far, I've met up with 2 people and they both want to see me again, so that's been a bit of a confidence boost too.

Its been a lot of fun so far and not nearly as scary as I thought it would be. I think I would be ok just doing the dating thing for a while, rather than going straight into another relationship. As I say, I'm having fun just meeting new people and going on dates.

I thought I met my "the one" when I was 18. He left me a few months ago and I can see now that it was for the best. Like you, I've been able to think christ I would have missed out on certain things. He was also Mr Grumpy, so I'm glad I don't have to put up with that any more lol.

I think theres this massive stigma in our society that if you are single then you can't possible be truly happy and I must admit I was guilty of thinking that way before I became single, but I really am happy right now. I mean, hey, I've got 3 dates this week with 3 lovely guys, taken women can't do that

VestanPance

I'll go against the grain. I'd say one good long relationship is worth more than a million random dates.

Dickdasdedly_2

i second that

coin_operated_girl

Well of course, I just meant that I think its perfectly possible to be happy being single and to have fun whilst looking for "the one"