Help with Ear Stretchers please

craftoholic

you can buy ear stretchers in lots of little 'alternative' shops. There needs to be no piercer involved at all.

busiscoming2

pinkpig08 wrote: »

I would imagine that if it's left to heal before taking the stretcher out then the hole will not close up. After all, the skin around the hole will have healed.

I personally think they look awful and would hate it if my son came home with one in the future.

That is my thinking too.

craftoholic

busiscoming2 wrote: »

That is my thinking too.

It does close up, depending on the persons healing rate. My first lot were in for months before I took them out, matter of weeks and they were back to normal

busiscoming2

craftoholic wrote: »

you can buy ear stretchers in lots of little 'alternative' shops. There needs to be no piercer involved at all.

This is where he apparently bought the stretchers from, he says they were only a couple of pounds each. They are plastic pointy bone shaped things.

andthethreebears

i started stretching mine aged about 16, so i've had them a decade!
on the contrary to (what seems to be) popular belief having 'stretches' has had no impact on my career! i do not push trolleys, i am not hidden away in an office, i am not in a 'trade'!
in my opinion there are lots more 'alternative' piercings or modifications that are far more off putting - i would rather work with someone who has piercings than someone who doesnt know what an anti-perspirant is for!

if your son is choosing to stretch his ears, and you are letting him - at least make sure he does it sensibly.
i was advised: sterilise each new stretcher before using it, use mild salt water baths to clean the lobe, and something like a mix of vitamin e oil / tea tree / lavendar oil to moisturise. DO NOT stretch too quickly becuase there is the risk of splitting the lobe - or creating a misshapen hole.
They can be left to shrink back, but you do get a 'cats bum' effect after a certain size.

craftoholic

busiscoming2 wrote: »

This is where he apparently bought the stretchers from, he says they were only a couple of pounds each. They are plastic pointy bone shaped things.

yeah sounds about right, they're the tapers, if you measure it across the widest part, thats the width of it - 10mm is the widest that is recommended that it'll go back to normal. if you dont like the tapers (which my mom didnt, she hated them) you could make a comprimise with him of a certain size and he has to wear a tunnel? they just look like an earing really, to give you some idea mine is a 10mm and i cant even fit a biro pen through the hole that is visible.

peachyprice

craftoholic wrote: »

You can get a disfigurment from playing sports, but people dont discourage their children from doing this.

Sorry, that is the most ridiculous argument ever, you cannot compare a sports injury to a child permanently disfiguring themselves.

Surely theres more satisfaction for a parent to be able to say I told you so than having a boring whitewash kid who has no identity and isnt allowed to express themselves?

I would get far more satisfaction knowing that I'd brought I my child up to think of the consequences of their actions than seeing them give themselves the potentially irreversible appearance of a little oik.

There are other ways for a child to show their own identity without permanently disfuguring themselves. My son has very long hair, loves it now, when he grows up he can change it.

craftoholic

An exageration yes, but everything in life comes with a risk and surely the best thing the OP can do is discourage her son and warn him of the dangers rather than actually punish him?! I always though punishments were for doing really bad things, not for choosing to alter your own appearance which is not illegal. its not a permanent disfigurment, if you've read my posts, under 10mm, no worries. If the parent agrees this, and the child agrees, but then chooses to go bigger, then thats punishment worthy. I can guarentee he'll get bored before that stage anyway.

bringing a child up 'to think of the consequences of their actions' is completely different to not allowing them to actually ever see this consequence for themselves.

little oik? bit rude and offensive thanks. Theres moderation, and theres just been a plain idiot. It depends how responsible the OP thinks her son is.

meg72

craftoholic wrote: »

It's not ILLEGAL. Parents should be there to advise and guide, not to shelter kids from having an identity. If he goes and gets a tattoo - punish him, as its illegal. If he does end up stretching it to 30000000mm and ripping it and ruining his ear for life, its his mistake. You can get a disfigurment from playing sports, but people dont discourage their children from doing this. Surely theres more satisfaction for a parent to be able to say I told you so than having a boring whitewash kid who has no identity and isnt allowed to express themselves?

I would find no satisfaction in telling a disfigured child I told you so,
its part and parcel of a parents job to protect them.

craftoholic

you're all acting as if he wants to get dermal anchors or his cheeks pierced or a tattoo from head to toe. In moderation, ear stretching is fine, im sure if OP says to son 'if you go past 10mm its very likely to rip and your ear will look vile for the rest of your life but any less than that and it can go back to normal very easy' her son would not want to risk it? . which was the OPs question, was it not?