Help with Ear Stretchers please

pinkpig08

I would imagine that if it's left to heal before taking the stretcher out then the hole will not close up. After all, the skin around the hole will have healed.

I personally think they look awful and would hate it if my son came home with one in the future.

DKLS

Ravenlady wrote: »

I wouldn't judge a book by its cover and start the holier than thou approach on appearance.

I don't normally judge but I work in a conservative industry, and whilst I have hired people with assorted tatts and piercings, they are all for back office coding roles, if a candidate turned up with big holes in their ears for a client facing role they wouldn't get a 2nd interview.

craftoholic

I thought I would reply as a teen with experience of this.
Im 18 now, but I stretched my ears when I was about 15? I know I was still in school anyway.
FWIW my mom HATED it, but I did it anyway. A normal earing hole is 1.3mm, I started at 3mm and went up to around 5mm in each ear. Then decided I was bored, took them out, healed back to normal earing size. The only thing is, in my left ear, if i sleep with an earing in or have one in for weeks and weeks, the back goes into my ear a little bit - but this also happens with my nan and she's never stretched her ear!!!
Few months after I took them out, decided to stretch just the one ear again, my right, up to an 8mm. Its currently a 10mm - so 1cm. Everyone at work has saw it, and I work in a respectable office environment. They all say it doesnt look bad because its fairly small - it doesnt change the shape of my ear lobe at all, so it just looks like an earing you can see through now I have the tunnel in.
As a rule of thumb - according to piercers, internet ect. any smaller than 10mm and they will shrink back to normal size on removal - but that depends on your own healing. A friend had hers at about 2cm :eek: and took them out and they both returned to normal size.
You do have to be careful of tearing though, and you should always leave a few weeks before going up a size - I made the mistake of going from healed to 8mm in a week or two and ouuuch!
I agree the tapers (the long pointy triangle thingys) arent very appealing, but tunnels of a respectable size are nice, and yes maybe I am slightly biased, but I've never recieved negative comments whilst wearing a tunnel/plug, only when wearing the tapers.
My advice for your son would be not to go above 10 - although you have said that the normal piercing made his ear lobe protrude? this happened to my boyfriend so he only went to a 5mm to stop it from looking unnaturally minging. Sometimes kids are determined to do things their parents hate, I know I was, so just give him advice on how to look after it. He will get bored eventually trust me, I dont know anyone who has kept their stretchers in from a young age to now without taking them out for a bit at least. He must keep it clean with tea tree or tcp or similar, else they start to smell really vile !!!!!
He will also realise how expensive it gets. Its just a style thing, and also a music scene thing. Im not a raging emo/goth or whatever btw, I dress in fashionable clothes, with red normal hair, and work as a marketing assistant in a normal job who happens to like ear stretchers which is probably influenced by my perfectly healthy like for rock music. people are too quick to criticise. :cool:

lizzielondon

He's 14 you are in charge! No pocket money no treats until he takes it out or does whatever he needs to do to fix it. When he's 18 he can think about it again

euronorris

shelley_crow wrote: »

I saw a tattooist at a tattoo convention and his ears were stretched so far you could get coke cans through them.

I knew someone like that too. I really don't like the whole stretched ear look.

craftoholic

It's not ILLEGAL. Parents should be there to advise and guide, not to shelter kids from having an identity. If he goes and gets a tattoo - punish him, as its illegal. If he does end up stretching it to 30000000mm and ripping it and ruining his ear for life, its his mistake. You can get a disfigurment from playing sports, but people dont discourage their children from doing this. Surely theres more satisfaction for a parent to be able to say I told you so than having a boring whitewash kid who has no identity and isnt allowed to express themselves?

lorietta

I do know people who have done this. They have been able to get jobs in customer facing roles, provided they put in flesh coloured or clear "plugs", normally. In general the ear will shrink down, especially if the hole is under 1cm in diametre. I know someone who has had the hole shrink from nearly 2cm to slightly bigger than a normal earing size, but he can wear a normal earing in it. However, I don't think this would be true of everyone's ears, and it took about 6 months to shrink.

My main concern about your son is that he is stretching his ears too fast. Normally, a piercing studio (and I don't think he is doing this under the supervision of a qualified piercer, as they will normally ask for proof of age that he is 16), will advise you to wait until the ear is fully healed before begining stretching, and they will stretch the ear very slowly. If this is not done carefully, I do know someone who has actually split his ear lobe in half doing this too fast. He cannot get surgery to repair it on the NHS, as it is considered self inflicted, and he can't afford to do it privately, and his ear does look a mess. As the piercing has not been done professionally and may not be ideally placed, I would be especially wary.

If his ear is weeping and looks !!!!!, I would take him to a doctor, or a piercing studio if he won't go to a doctor's, as it could be sign of serious infection. I doubt any of the equiptment he has used has been properly sterilized, and it could be a serious health risk. If the flesh starts to look purple/bruised, I think this is a warning he is stretching his ears too fast, and damaging the blood vessels.

I would ask him how much he has researched stretching, and if he understands the risks, and how best to do it safely. I'm not in any way experienced, ear stretching has never appealled to me, but from what you've said in your first post, I think he is doing it too fast, and it could have nasty consequences.

euronorris

Kids don't play sports to specifically disfigure themselves. It is sometimes an unfortunate result. Stretching your ear though, is purposely disfiguring yourself.

But you're right, once he gets to 18 (or whatever the legal age is), he can do what he likes with regards to piercings etc. But he's only 14 right now.

lorietta

Actually, I believe there is no "legal age" for piercings as such- although there is a limit of 18 for genital piercings. Councils can choose to enforce one at liscenced studios, however- normally 16 or 18 without parental consent. Even if the council doesn't do this, most studios wouldn't advise someone on ear stretching (or any other kind) before they were 16 without a parent's consent. They might also sell the equiptment to someone without asking for proof of age.

craftoholic

True.

There is no 'legal' age for it though. And its vary rare that its done at a piercers, unless you have it 'punched' which is going from normal to fairly big straight away which is a really silly thing to do. If you do it properly, it doesnt cut the skin at all. I think it is a good idea to make the op's son aware of the dangers but the more parents 'lecture' about things - especially things like this, the more likely the kid is to do it anyway. I had one friend who just took them out at home and covered the holes, and she lied to her mom for years. The kid isnt legally doing anything wrong. So its best to advise and discourage, rather than to punish.