How much sex is ok for you?

MessyMare

Gavin83 wrote: »

Never experienced this to be honest. If it's dipped theres always been a reason.

I'm honestly still not convinced it would just drop for no reason. I'm not even convinced a woman's hormones would vary that much to affect your sex life unless shes pregnant or menopausal. Unless shes going through some big change why would they?

Welp, mine is at rock bottom again. I have a fantastic, full time low stress job, I'm getting on better than ever before with my family, my OH is losing weight and getting fitter (rawr, god he's flippin gorgeous), life is excellent. But I'm perfectly happy to lay in bed with OH having a cuddle and no sex.

I don't like my body- that's the only thing. But then, at the height of my body loathing I was having sex 3x a day or so.

Explain that one!

Sex drive does peak and trough, as many others have said. Sometimes the causes for troughs are obvious, sometimes they're not. An ex of mine used to push and push and push for reasons and when I didn't know, I used to stress myself and get upset thinking that I was wholly abnormal. On the whole my OH and I are far more relaxed about these things, so it doesn't worry me. I know it'll pick up again in time.

MessyMare

And here's a question for the men on this thread- how do you feel when your advances are rejected? Just curious as last time mine were rejected I felt quite hurt, but then...I've probably rejected his more than he's rejected mine, so does he feel as hurt as me or is he just resigned to it?

Just curious, my best friend is male but I can't ask him because he's a sex fiend, I don't think he's ever rejected an advance in his life!

Lotus-eater

ColleenPamela wrote: »

And here's a question for the men on this thread- how do you feel when your advances are rejected? Just curious as last time mine were rejected I felt quite hurt, but then...I've probably rejected his more than he's rejected mine, so does he feel as hurt as me or is he just resigned to it?

Just curious, my best friend is male but I can't ask him because he's a sex fiend, I don't think he's ever rejected an advance in his life!

Really really really annoyed tbh

I don't seem to be able to help it, I know all the things about how you are supposed to be able to just lie there and say it doesn't matter, but I've never been able to do it.
Next day I'm ok and not worried about it, but at the time, I'm a p1ssed off bloke.

MessyMare

Lotus-eater wrote: »

Really really really annoyed tbh

I don't seem to be able to help it, I know all the things about how you are supposed to be able to just lie there and say it doesn't matter, but I've never been able to do it.
Next day I'm ok and not worried about it, but at the time, I'm a p1ssed off bloke.

I think I need to re-think my attitude to shexual relations...I really don't want him to be upset! Perhaps I should be making more effort...

Lotus-eater

ColleenPamela wrote: »

I think I need to re-think my attitude to shexual relations...I really don't want him to be upset! Perhaps I should be making more effort...

Everyone takes it a different way, I am a very demanding person where sex is concerned, sometimes that's good and sometimes not.
It's better to ask him honestly how he feels.

nthomas

You can get condoms for free if you go to the family planning clinic!

umdelicious

Can't remember. Wish I could! :rotfl:

euronorris

balletshoes wrote: »

As someone else here said, we have a couple of hours in the late evening too midweek, after DD has gone to bed, and before I get really tired and just want to sleep.

Yeah, OH soon learnt that after 11pm generally means it ain't gonna happen, as I am too tired by then. But before then I am generally more awake and more up for it (so to speak).

euronorris

Gavin83 wrote: »

Never experienced this to be honest. If it's dipped theres always been a reason.

I'm honestly still not convinced it would just drop for no reason. I'm not even convinced a woman's hormones would vary that much to affect your sex life unless shes pregnant or menopausal. Unless shes going through some big change why would they?

Normal monthly fluctuations. Since coming off the pill, I seem to follow a pattern of no drive in 1st week, low drive second week, then high drive, followed by low in 4th week, and so the cycle repeats.

Problems with thyroids can have a massive effect too. As can a host of other mental and physical illnesses. Just because you may not have experienced them yourself does not mean they won't happen, or don't exist.

Also, just because something didn't affect you for years beforehand, doesn't mean it won't start! I was on the pill for 13 years without issue, and then started to develope migraines which gradually became more severe and very frequent. Came off the pill, migraines disappeared. Never going on anything hormonal EVER again.

Dontknowanymore

I must be weird because when I was with my ex, kids or not, pregnant or not we would have it almost every day!
I don't understand how looking after children would make you too tired for sex?

I've just started seeing somene and we only see eachother at weekends at the moment so have to have marathon sessions