MSE Pregnancy Club 23

Kira000

twigpig wrote: »

Hey everyone

kira - It's a tough one when it comes to kids and weddings. The problem the couple has is that if they make exceptions for small babies and another "baby" is a bit older, how does she explain to another mum that her child can't come. I think it's easier all round to say no kids or allow kids, as there will always be someone missing the "cut off" lol. I'd be miffed if I had say a 3yr old and wasn't allowed to bring them, but someone else has their child with them. It really is a tough one and no matter what the couple do, they can't please everyone......

Oh, i totally agree- we had the same rationale for our own wedding, so i have no problem with bean NOT being invited. It was unfortunate that within the guest list for our wedding, there were about 18 kids of various ages if we had allowed them, and the venue size and budget just couldnt cope with an additional 18 (even if some were half price!).

I guess i was more pondering on whether i was being a bit precious saying that i wouldnt be happy leaving our just 4 month old bean for what would essentially be 2 days, what with the 5+ hours travel each way...
It is replies by end of Jan, but even then, i have no idea if i will feel ready to leave her for so long, or if circumstances will allow it. And knowing budget and organising that go into weddings, i REALLY dont want to say yes hoping it will be ok, and then blow them out later on. That would have really peed me off doing our own wedding!

Kira000

twigpig wrote: »

Can't remember who is waiting til after xmas for their 16w check (ginvt maybe). Just wanted to say that in my area, they no longer check heartbeat at the 16w appointment. Have to wait here until the 25 week appointment......

Same here. The m/w outright refused to listen for heart beat at the 16 week appointment, and same at the 20 week- as it is still apparently hit and miss if they will hear it on the day, and if they try and fail, then you HAVE to be referred for further investigation despite them knowing chances are its just a position thing. I think i had to wait till 24 weeks..

ginvzt

twigpig wrote: »

Can't remember who is waiting til after xmas for their 16w check (ginvt maybe). Just wanted to say that in my area, they no longer check heartbeat at the 16w appointment. Have to wait here until the 25 week appointment......

It was me - I am not bothered about them listening in to hear the heartbeats - it was the excuse midwife used not to give us the consultant appointment before Christmas. We heard the heart beat 3 times, and are awaiting for the doppler, so I guess we will be fine without them trying to listen in at the next appointment. Besides, I was doubting they will anyway!

jenjade

oh this nesting thing is really weird. I have just fixed the fence panels! however the washing up still needs doing! odd

Blue_Monkey

Kira - could you ask your friend for a local babysitter recommendation so that someone could look after the baby for a couple of hours at your hotel or wherever you're staying? Or could a relative of yours go too? I guess that's a lot of faffing but perhaps could work. I had been invited to a hen do which was one night overnight in London - we're only about an hour away so not far, but it's in March so our baby would be < 3 months and I'm planning on feeding so I just said I'd have to play it by ear in terms of whether I stay overnight etc... But it's now been made local so it's not an issue anymore. I don't think it's precious, perhaps just call your friend and explain your dilemma?

4nnabella

Hi everyone, you're a chatty bunch today, have just had to catch up on three pages!

I had my 34 week MW appointment today and am now resting on the sofa instead of being back at work as my blood pressure has shot up from what it normally is. She took it 3 times, and it just kept getting higher! So I was told in no uncertain terms that I was not allowed to go back to work this afternoon, and I should take tomorrow off too (which luckily I'd actually booked off anyway) and I have to do absolutely nothing for the next 24 hours and go back to see her tomorrow afternoon to see if it's come down. She asked me when I was finishing work and when I said the end of the month she said I may have to think about bringing that forward if my BP stays high, as I may be overdoing it. Ho hum. This also means that I have to miss our work Christmas meal, which is tonight. Not that I'm fussed about missing a night out, it's more to do with the fact that I've paid for the meal and I won't get my money back! SO am trying to rest but actually am quite annoyed too! :rotfl: Apart from that, everything is ok with Pip. S/he's head down, bum in my ribs, good strong heart beat (which incidentally I don't think I heard until my 24 week appointment...)

I hope everything is ok with you Rebekah, it's good that you're getting seen so quickly.

Kira - we've been invited to an evening reception at the beginning of April which we've decided to decline as I don't think I'll be comfortable leaving the baby even just for an evening! The venue is near(-ish) my parents but they'll be at the wedding too so they can't babysit, and OH's parents live here in Nottingham and I definitely won't be comfortable leaving my eight-week old baby overnight, even with the PILs. So we are not going. Obviously it's only an evening invitation, so not quite the same as if we'd been invited to the whole day (and to be honest I'm not sure if it's child-free or not, I know they have a lot of friends with children...) but I understand your dilemma...

Kira000

Blue_Monkey wrote: »

Kira - could you ask your friend for a local babysitter recommendation so that someone could look after the baby for a couple of hours at your hotel or wherever you're staying? Or could a relative of yours go too? I guess that's a lot of faffing but perhaps could work. I had been invited to a hen do which was one night overnight in London - we're only about an hour away so not far, but it's in March so our baby would be < 3 months and I'm planning on feeding so I just said I'd have to play it by ear in terms of whether I stay overnight etc... But it's now been made local so it's not an issue anymore. I don't think it's precious, perhaps just call your friend and explain your dilemma?

Thanks BM. I know the whole weddings/children thing can get very emotive, and just didnt want to seem like i was being OTT. If it wasnt so far away, i'd probably just say sod it, i'll go, and make DH stay at home with expressed milk, and i can leave early if i need to, but its just soooooo far, and knowing it would take me so long to get home if something did happen, would be a killer. Not really got anyone to take with us either..
I'll think i'll give her a call and say no, and explain why, and if she wants to offer anything, then its in her court, without any pressure.

Kira000

4nnabella wrote: »

Kira - we've been invited to an evening reception at the beginning of April which we've decided to decline as I don't think I'll be comfortable leaving the baby even just for an evening! The venue is near(-ish) my parents but they'll be at the wedding too so they can't babysit, and OH's parents live here in Nottingham and I definitely won't be comfortable leaving my eight-week old baby overnight, even with the PILs. So we are not going. Obviously it's only an evening invitation, so not quite the same as if we'd been invited to the whole day (and to be honest I'm not sure if it's child-free or not, I know they have a lot of friends with children...) but I understand your dilemma...

Ours isnt the whole day either- it is wedding breakfast onwards, so from 5pm to 11ish- which makes going all that way for so short a time, even harder!

Sorry your BP seems to have bumped up. Great excuse for a cosy afternoon infront of the telly if you ask me . I think i remember you getting the hypnotherapy stuff? If so, i recommend using the chance to have a listen. My m/w commented how relaxed i seemed about everything, and my BP has actually been dropping everytime, since i started listening to it!

ginvzt

I' d say that your solution sounds perfect, kira.

I have my pregnancy risk assessment interview in the next 5 min.

Kira000

ginvzt wrote: »

I' d say that your solution sounds perfect, kira.

I have my pregnancy risk assessment interview in the next 5 min.

Thanks hon. Good luck with the assessment. Don't be afraid to raise any extra points that concern you, even if they dont seem keen or dont raise them themselves..